It has Been 1 Week........

Old 04-16-2010, 07:59 AM
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It has Been 1 Week........

Since I asked Ah to move out. House is calm and peaceful except for high school son and college son laughing and cutting up and dogs chasing balls and playing with toys. No cursing - well not angry cursing - no fights, no gross beer breath stinking up my room, no moaning about how life sucks and how the country sucks and how much a holes we are! Life is good - truly - for me - I just have to stay positive and know I am doing the right thing - which I am. I shopped for a jet ski last night so AH can have the freaking boat. I will have a cute little jet ski and my neighbor said I can keep it on her extra lift. Can't wait! Not saying this road is easy- I still get sad . I don't know if I cried yesterday but today I am getting a pedicure and damnit enjoying this beauty of a day! I am grateful and I know My Mom is proud of me in Heaven! I love you Mom!
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Old 04-16-2010, 08:03 AM
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YEAH BABY, you *so* rock
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Old 04-16-2010, 12:09 PM
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Yes, Yes, Yes. What a difference 1 little week makes. Going from what you had up to last week, to what you have now.....WOW.....chaos, moaning, "gimmee from him".... to fun, peace, order and "goodies for us and me".

Enjoy the jet ski

God bless
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Old 04-16-2010, 12:13 PM
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Clapping and hugs to you Redheadsusie.
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Old 04-16-2010, 01:06 PM
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Way to go, and it gets better too!
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Old 04-16-2010, 01:25 PM
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Ah, yes, normal life with people who like each other. Imagine.

I never missed my xAH or his kids one single minute. Never once.
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Old 04-16-2010, 03:09 PM
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sounds fantastic! what progress!!
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Old 04-16-2010, 03:20 PM
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Cheering over here, and high-fives...


posie
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Old 04-16-2010, 07:19 PM
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Had a glorious afternoon at my son's tennis match and then college son who is home and I rode the golf cart to the marina and ate and talked and laughed. I swear to God I have not had a date like that with Ah in years.! What a blessing my sons are! Ah told my son he is in our old town tonight with friends partying it up and is spending the night cause he will be wasted . Nice. Dont' miss that crap at all. I will be fine..I will be fine...I will be fine...... Who cares what he is doing right- I am at home with my 2 awesome sons and my dogs and saw some friends in the neighborhood and got a hug from another friend. LIFE IS GOOD!
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Old 04-16-2010, 08:14 PM
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Redheadsusie - way to go! Glad to know this afternoon was joyful, peaceful and filled with hope.
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Old 04-17-2010, 04:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Redheadsusie View Post
I shopped for a jet ski last night so AH can have the freaking boat. I will have a cute little jet ski and my neighbor said I can keep it on her extra lift.
Hey that's a good plan. I use to have a jet ski and lots of friends with boats. Jet skis are much easier to own, low maintenance and much easier on the wallet. Your friends with boats will invite you out because they want to play with your jet ski, it's a great symbiotic relationship.

Might I suggest a Yamaha Wave Runner. Those have the best pump designs and you get more thrust per horse power. Plus the engines were designed from scratch to be marine based and not just a modified snow mobile engine. Keep us posted on what you get!

Oh... and it sounds like you're doing great! I prescribe more fun on the water to help move on
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Old 04-17-2010, 04:47 AM
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what a glorious day you had. life is good
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Old 04-17-2010, 04:51 AM
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And the codie in the background can be heard faintly chanting:

SPF, SPF, SPF.......dont forget the sunscreen:ghug3
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Old 04-17-2010, 08:40 AM
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You guys are awesome. I am the queen of SPF. I spray constantly. Thanks for the reminder though Also- I am only looking at Yamaha- they have the best rep. Thank you for the recommendation! Heading out to William and Mary's Spring football game now! I am excited- My son's best friend from high school plays! Lfie is good!
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Old 04-17-2010, 09:31 AM
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I am so happy for you.....keep up the positive movement.
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Old 04-17-2010, 04:01 PM
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Back Pedal a little. Ah called to talk about his great time last night with old friends and what fun he had and he was bike riding and not going on the boat but might weed wack and wash his truck. Mind you this man has not not gone on the boat to drink in forever and now he calls and says yea- I'm great ....yada yada yada . I know it is blabber but God it made me pissy which even makes me more pissy that it upset me. I dont' care -I spent the day with my sons and a great family we know. He never did things like that with me..Why do I care. I am still moving on- can't talk to him. SOB!
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Old 04-18-2010, 09:34 AM
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Smile

Back pedaling is my middle name I think. I want my AH to be better for him and for our kids. So when he has some progress, I get hopeful. But, I am realistic enough to know that only time will tell....I can't make any decisions about his recovery until I see permanent recovery.

You didn't backpedal...you were just experiencing feelings that I think are a part of this whole issue!

Stay strong and believe in your strength.
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Old 04-19-2010, 09:52 AM
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wow. what an inspiration you are!
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Old 04-19-2010, 10:57 AM
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That is terrific to hear!!! Good for you. I hope you really enjoy your pedi and are happy with all your fabulous progress!! Stay positive is a great way of dealing with all this..
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Old 04-19-2010, 12:30 PM
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I found this a fun and useful exercise after my divorce:

Rehearsing comeback lines so I have them at the ready when my insides are churning & my mind goes blank.

I would look in the bathroom mirror, or do it while I was driving. Like practice cutting short his Exciting Weekend Report by saying energetically:
"Faaaaaaaaaaaaascinating, that's super, but the doorbell just buzzed - gotta go, byeeeeeeeee!"

"Oh, hi, I'm actually swamped at the moment - is it something urgent about the boys cuz my rhodedendrons need watering right now. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Super news! I had a fabulous weekend too. In fact I'm updating my blog right now so I gottta go byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

or maybe "Oh, hi, how are you? Can you make this quick, I have to get back to watching my toe nail polish dry!"

Whatever! I always end up cracking up and coming up with more and more outrageous comebacks that I may never get the chance to use but they help me let off steam and laughter IS the best medicine.

Here's to many more peaceful and fun days for you and your sons!
peace-
b
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