7 months so far.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 37
7 months so far.
i can't believe it has been 7 months. i never thought i'd be saying that.
not really sure what to say but i want to get some words out. maybe someone will benefit or gain some insight. i've sat down many times in the last month to type out a little of my story but for some reason i end up deleting it.
in not particular order.
it's been 7 months and by now i've done everything sober that i used to do drunk, new years eve, parties, sporting events (the superbowl and i am from new orleans, i still can't believe the saints won) you name it. i enjoy doing these things sober and have even been the life of the party....SOBER. that was a strange thing that happened in such and honest and innocent way and didn't offend anyone. hell i was just eating cookies.
it's been a huge emotional ride for me, i've gotten support from lots of folks but also have gotten no support from folks i thought would have supported me.
the lack of support from some people was strange, i didn't push anything though, i'd just walk away or change the topic.
no one who knows me tries to get me to drink anymore, they know i won't and that feels good to me.
...but some have left me with comments like "i know you'll be back" or "we're waiting for you over on the darkside...."
i'd never say that to someone who has given this crap up. alchoholism is like prison, we drink because we can't help it, not becuase we want to.
i can distinctly remember many times saying "i am not drinking today" and i'd go on autopilot to the liquor store. all the while my heart was sinking in my chest. i didn't want to drink but at that time i didn't have the strength not to.
i see the heavy drinkers now and it reminds me of how i used to me, i am shocked and extremely dissappointed at what i was doing to myself, others around me, and in general how i was acting. it saddens me for them but it gives me strength. at the end of a party when everyone is sloppy my resolve is stronger than ever.
i say a prayer for every single one of them every time. if they ever need me for anything i'd drop what i was doing.. all they need to do is ask, i won't force myself on anyone but damnit i drop hints all the time
after a few months, once folks realized i was serious an awesome thing happened, people around me started drinking less. that is truly amazing to me.
my brother, who was on the same road i was, gave it up. that makes me very happy.
i think about alchohol ALLOT but there is never the urge to drink it. i wish i didn't think about it at all.
randomness:
i've lost 40 pounds and am in the best shape ever for me.
i plan on never drinking again, that is a huge statement but i am pretty sure i can do it.
i just imagine being able to say i haven't had a drink in 20 years!!
i don't miss any desserts and i don't plan to.
quiting happened by getting the flu, i didn't feel like drinking for a couple of days and i held on to that with vigor. one day turned into two, two turned into a week, a week turned into a month and my strength grew.
the day i quit, i was not planning on quiting, thank you to the higher power that stepped in and gave me that tiny window (foothold) it was all i needed.
ok, got that off my chest, time to go workout!
not really sure what to say but i want to get some words out. maybe someone will benefit or gain some insight. i've sat down many times in the last month to type out a little of my story but for some reason i end up deleting it.
in not particular order.
it's been 7 months and by now i've done everything sober that i used to do drunk, new years eve, parties, sporting events (the superbowl and i am from new orleans, i still can't believe the saints won) you name it. i enjoy doing these things sober and have even been the life of the party....SOBER. that was a strange thing that happened in such and honest and innocent way and didn't offend anyone. hell i was just eating cookies.
it's been a huge emotional ride for me, i've gotten support from lots of folks but also have gotten no support from folks i thought would have supported me.
the lack of support from some people was strange, i didn't push anything though, i'd just walk away or change the topic.
no one who knows me tries to get me to drink anymore, they know i won't and that feels good to me.
...but some have left me with comments like "i know you'll be back" or "we're waiting for you over on the darkside...."
i'd never say that to someone who has given this crap up. alchoholism is like prison, we drink because we can't help it, not becuase we want to.
i can distinctly remember many times saying "i am not drinking today" and i'd go on autopilot to the liquor store. all the while my heart was sinking in my chest. i didn't want to drink but at that time i didn't have the strength not to.
i see the heavy drinkers now and it reminds me of how i used to me, i am shocked and extremely dissappointed at what i was doing to myself, others around me, and in general how i was acting. it saddens me for them but it gives me strength. at the end of a party when everyone is sloppy my resolve is stronger than ever.
i say a prayer for every single one of them every time. if they ever need me for anything i'd drop what i was doing.. all they need to do is ask, i won't force myself on anyone but damnit i drop hints all the time
after a few months, once folks realized i was serious an awesome thing happened, people around me started drinking less. that is truly amazing to me.
my brother, who was on the same road i was, gave it up. that makes me very happy.
i think about alchohol ALLOT but there is never the urge to drink it. i wish i didn't think about it at all.
randomness:
i've lost 40 pounds and am in the best shape ever for me.
i plan on never drinking again, that is a huge statement but i am pretty sure i can do it.
i just imagine being able to say i haven't had a drink in 20 years!!
i don't miss any desserts and i don't plan to.
quiting happened by getting the flu, i didn't feel like drinking for a couple of days and i held on to that with vigor. one day turned into two, two turned into a week, a week turned into a month and my strength grew.
the day i quit, i was not planning on quiting, thank you to the higher power that stepped in and gave me that tiny window (foothold) it was all i needed.
ok, got that off my chest, time to go workout!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,775
Congrats on your seven months sober and your improved health.
And good for you for sticking to your sobriety while others are just "waiting for you to come over to the darkside"... Be true to yourself, no matter what.
Again, congrats and big hugs! :ghug3
And good for you for sticking to your sobriety while others are just "waiting for you to come over to the darkside"... Be true to yourself, no matter what.Again, congrats and big hugs! :ghug3
Snarf Snarf
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: ATL
Posts: 835
That's awesome, tabata! I hope that I too can one day say I've not had a drink for 7 months. So glad you've been able to do it.
I myself am just starting down this road. I've found AA to be incredibly helpful to me. Have you been involved in any type of program, or have you found that you've been able to abstain by sheer willpower?
Congratulations again!
I myself am just starting down this road. I've found AA to be incredibly helpful to me. Have you been involved in any type of program, or have you found that you've been able to abstain by sheer willpower?
Congratulations again!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: IL
Posts: 81
7 months is great and inspiring! Whats really inspiring is all the positives just 7 months off of booze brought you! You are now in shape, 40 lbs lighter, having fun while being sober around drinkers, and positively impacting people around you! Thats awesome and I'm happy to hear you are doing sooooo well!
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