I confronted her
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Right where I need to be
Posts: 601
I confronted her
I talked to the lady from my Alanon group after our last meeting. Shedidn't have a lot of time to talk, she had an appointmnt to get to. Here is the low down 
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I got the facts first. She said she did go to my AH's trial. I asked if he had asked her to be there. She said no.
I expressed to her my discomfort with this.
I explained that I fet like a boundary had been violated, personally and in the Alanon group. That I was uncomfortable with her taking information from the meeting/after a meeting and then inserting herself into my peronal situation.
She seemed a little taken back, didn't quite understand. She said, well I thought you were going to be testifying.
I replied, I did not invite you to be there for support. I understand your motives were genuine, but I did not ask you to be there. Can you imagine if that was the day I was suppose to testify and I saw you there with no prior knowledge you were comming. It would have been very difficult for me.
I repeated that a personal boundary was violated a few times and reitterated that we need to keep the things we hear in the confines of our minds and not act upon them.
I also requested that she please not speak about my family situation with former co-workers. She said she hadn't, but clearly she had or else I would not of known that she went to AH's trial. (I didn't argue though, I kept it to myself)
I said my peace and left in peace
It was all very civil. I really hope she got it though??
I think I will be distancing myself from her though.
. I got the facts first. She said she did go to my AH's trial. I asked if he had asked her to be there. She said no.
I expressed to her my discomfort with this.
I explained that I fet like a boundary had been violated, personally and in the Alanon group. That I was uncomfortable with her taking information from the meeting/after a meeting and then inserting herself into my peronal situation.
She seemed a little taken back, didn't quite understand. She said, well I thought you were going to be testifying.
I replied, I did not invite you to be there for support. I understand your motives were genuine, but I did not ask you to be there. Can you imagine if that was the day I was suppose to testify and I saw you there with no prior knowledge you were comming. It would have been very difficult for me.
I repeated that a personal boundary was violated a few times and reitterated that we need to keep the things we hear in the confines of our minds and not act upon them.
I also requested that she please not speak about my family situation with former co-workers. She said she hadn't, but clearly she had or else I would not of known that she went to AH's trial. (I didn't argue though, I kept it to myself)
I said my peace and left in peace
It was all very civil. I really hope she got it though??I think I will be distancing myself from her though.
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