Twiddle

Hello - I need to vent sorry for this

I am sick of that gnarling feeling in the pit of my stomach...I am sick of not feeling loved...I know this sounds selfish but when is it my turn to have a person to lean on...I let my husband (the recovering Alcohilc of 6 months) lean on me everyday...tell him I love him every day...give him kisses everyday...but I get nothing in return...now when he looks at me he justs looks through me, he can't even look at me straight in the eye...when I ask for 5 minutes of his time he has an excuse like the dog needs him or something stupid like that (he gives more hugs and kisses to the dog than me, which is kindda strange to be jealous of a dog).

When will he see me and love me again...can't he see that I loved him when he was drinking and I love him even more that he's not?

It seemd like he loved me more when he was drinking...now he'd rather be with his new AA friends and confide in them.

wanting

Twiddle, I know how you feel. I had those same feelings for years. The thing is, that time may never come, and I had to realize that I needed help and healing, so that *I* could become that person who loves myself. This situation and this person are in your life for a reason - maybe that reason is so that you can finally face whatever it is that makes you seek from others what you should be giving yourself. That was the lesson for me anyway. I got to a point where I embraced the pain because I knew it would bring healing. I began to look at the recurring themes in my life and am working on healing those deeper problems that led me to a marriage with an emotionally unavailable man.

FindingPeace1

Hear, hear!
I think first, we begin to love ourselves as much as we want love
And second, when we do, we can see if others are not treating us with the love and honor we now know we deserve.