Nichole78

As im sitting here crying my heart out because my brother gf threw him out again with no phone, no money, no food, i need a reminder that he will wake up and do the right thing with his recovery once again!

This girl is young, 18 yrs old has a child and is pregnant with his child and playing so many head games with him, one min she loves him and is gonna stand by him, next min hes out on the street and he keeps going back for more (3 times now)

So now he doesnt have a phone cause he lost it when he got high last week, no money, no food yes i feel bad real real bad, but is this what he NEEDS for him to hit bottom again and go back into treatment???

I hate the hurt i feel, and i hate that he is hurting so badly

I just need some comfort from others ...thank you

outtolunch

Getting high is more important to your brother right now than his phone, money, food, housing or his unborn baby.

There is absolutely nothing his GF can do to force him to seek help. There is nothing anyone can do. No one controls him . He either controls himself or not. It has to come from within him. Sounds like he is not ready, right now.

Give him the dignity of experiencing the consequences of his behavior. Rescuing and enabling him will not help him. He has to do this because he wants it, more so than anything else. He has a long journey ahead of him.

cinderellawkids

Maybe she's playing headgames or maybe she is truly in pain too and throws him out because its what is best for her children.

The most loving thing for the people in his life to do is let go and stop feeding into his grief, he's where he's at due to his choices

Nichole78

im not going to blame her for throwing him out, it was just the moment i found out i got upset, but now that i think more into it i know its whats for the best.

he called me tongiht from someones phone at a meeting, he went to SMOCK,,,its the company that runs the sober house he was in, they have all kinds of programs, shelters ect... he filled out the paper work and has to go back at 9am to talk to someone,

He definitely knows he needs help, he says he needs help, maybe hes just not ready to put in the work that goes along with it, we shall see tomorrow.

JMFburns

Hang in there Nichole, I know it's hard to hear, but he is a man and can take care of himself. Try to keep the focus on yourself - express love and caring, but when you hang up that phone try to turn it over to your Higher Power and move on with you day/evening.

A big hug to you.

coffeedrinker

if it's a reminder you need, you got it. we all need those from time to time.

you know what you know.

of course he's hurting, of course he knows what he needs to do - it's just frightening. but he does have to do it on his own. you'll be waiting for him on the other side.