dedubya

I have anxiety but nothing major yet, also can tell I am not going to be able to sleep well tonight. Last drink was Wed night in Las Vegas on a business trip....had 5 beers with a group after dinner. I knew I was quitting today, have been planning this for a while. Wonder what tomorrow will bring? Thought I would touch base. I have had enough of this crap and this is it.
Dub

fragrantrose

That is great news Dub!
I am day 2 after relapse I am so sick and disgusted with myself that I have had to take to my bed for the day,wasted day,eating wrong foods, exercise program falls apart,at least I managed to drag myself to work yesterday.
Why do we do this to ourselves, why cant I accept in my inner most being that I can no longer drink safely again i know there is a much happier motivated me inside as i have given up before for nearly 4 years!
I am here to say to anyone who reads this THE LONGER WE KEEP DRINKING the HARDER IT IS TO GIVE UP and THERE MAY NOT BE A NEXT TIME ......STOP NOW WHILE YOU ARE AHEAD

Hevyn

Dub, I hope this can be where the insanity ends for you. Drinking isn't giving you anything but misery at this point - the enjoyment you once got from it isn't coming back. That was so hard for me to realize, but once I did - I made it out. You can do this. We are all behind you.

Fandy

congrats on Day #1 Dub!!! which will turn into Day 2 and beyond...small steps one day at a time...draw on the the strength from the people that love you too.

did you make a doctor appt? do you need to work with him/her for help with stopping? keep us posted on your progress.

24hrsAday

Glad You Have Had Enough Dubya.. i Know You Can Do it My Friend!

least

THat is so true! I'm afraid to start drinking again as I fear I might not have any more recovery left in me. Or if I drink again one of the 'yets' I haven't had yet will happen, something I can't easily undo, something that could wreck my life. Sober is safer and better.

Congrats on day one! May you have many more sober days one at a time.

NEOMARXIST

All the best mate


Peace and Love

dedubya

Well it's morning of day two- and I need to knock on wood, I really dont feel too bad at all. Kind of lethargic and anxious at the same time- which is weird. I thought WDs would be in close to full force this morning....they were last time I did this, but I was drinkiing a lot more. I also know that today could possibly be when it hits, but I am strong on this and ready to take it on. I know several will/have ask about DR plans. I am going to take my BP 2-3 times a day to keep an eye on it, and also if I start shaking too bad I will go to ER, its only minutes away. Last time I was shaking like a flag in a hurricane, but I had been hard at it for 3-4 months prior to going to detox ctr (for those that dont know- I was laid off last spring with pay for 12 months (but started back working in July....., and I spent my days riding my Harley and drinking pretty much all day- but never on the bike by the way). That's enough for now. Going to work out- I am off work until Tuesday, sneaked in a mini 4 day weekend to do this.
Love and Peace
Dub

Emmy69

Your situation sounds like mine. I was laid off about 12 months ago from high tech/software sales and had no luck finding anything else yet. I'm starting day 5 of my sobriety and waiting for the WD to hit and so far just high anxiety at night and quick temper during the day, but no real bad WDs. Kind of weird. I too like to ride my Harley for chilling out, but kind of hard to do in the winter here in NH.

This site has been great for me and I hope it helps your efforts too! Hang in there, we can do it!

SCAMY04

Your doing great Im on day 13 Ive had ups and downs but the day has started good Im starting to feel alot better I hope you do and I hope tou have a good day stay positive

dedubya

Hey Emmy
awesome on 5 days- can't wait to be able to say that. If you are like me- idle time is dangerous ground, like a mine field. Best of luck in your job hunting, and keep adding to that 5 days!

Kerbcrawler

Yeah Good for you Dub.. Im on day 7 havent suffered too much,this time with DT,s first 2 days being pretty rough..I Know this Weekend is goin to be the Tough one it always is, a matter of fact just back from the supermarket..As i Headed past the drinks Isle there were the Wine specials..Without even thinkin instinctively went over and picked up an interesting label brand half price..And yes you guessed the Voice ooh that looks nice one for the road..We Could always do this thing from tommorow chain of thoughts came cruising through my brain!!! YOU ALL KNOW THE ONES!!!, almost being seduced by the glossy nice pic on the bottle, and the half price tag...COMPULSIONS OF OLD HABIT,
kickin in bigstyle... Well pulled myself away..ASs you DO!! headed down and am gettin by for now on a few alcohol free lagers..The type with no Alcohol in, its early days i figure for now..Its my Antidote for now..I know many dont agree with, though for now it helps me...GOOD LUCK DUB,and all other Newbie Quitters to the captive Poison.

Suomi

congrats to you all!!! Until coming to this website, I thought I was going nuts all alone at night when I've tried to quit and it's the difficulty of the night that gives me the most anxiety. Nice to know that I'm not alone and that it can be lived through (although it doesn't feel like it at 2am and your dog tired but can't sleep and you are sweaty and twitchy) - this gives me hope.

hands up for your strength!!!

Fandy

Dub; I just wanted to tell you that since i quit drinking wine 18 days ago, my BP is much more NORMAL....I even had to cut my dosage in 1/2....also my resting HR is naturally LOWER...it was running over 100, now it's settled into the low 80s.

exercise will definitely help (b-vitamins too)....I started with my weights today...first time in 6 months....not much but a start and I hope to build on it every day.

Tazman53

Glad to hear you are trying again.

Are you going to continue to "Fight" this your way again?

I sure hope not, it took me a lot of years relapsing all the time to figure out that doing it the same way over & over again always brought me the same results.

Mark75

Awesome buddy, stay close to SR. You said you were open to AA, might be something else to help you.

Mark

oldman

Dub:

I am with you man. I am on day 2 also. I started Antabuse last night (was scared but it's not so bad). I got lorazepam for the DT's and that certainly helps too.

I've been trying to get this thing for 5 years. I have not stopped going to AA at all - I just drank between meetings. And everyone knew it. And since I used my group as my higher power, my higher power turned it's back on me. Man, that's REALLY a bummer. I don't want to get all God on you, but he's the only one who will NEVER turn his back.

So, I am feeling pretty good. And I feel pretty safe because I know if I drink I am gonna be REAL REAL sick. Can't even have Tabasco (MAJOR bummer).

Anyway, know that you are not alone. You will never be alone in this fight. It's the hardest thing I have ever done.

Your pal, oldman

bbr

Hi Dub, I've been following your ups and downs since I started on SR over 3 months ago. YOU CAN DO IT! Hang in there. This time is the one for you.

BBR