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soooooooooooooooooo tired

Old 02-15-2010, 08:30 AM
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soooooooooooooooooo tired

i'm back to give this another try. I HATE MY INABILITY TO CONTROL MYSELF. 12 pack a day. went to church yesterday, prayed and prayed and prayed...by 3pm, cracking beers. No matter how strong my conviction at 10am, by 2pm, it's toast.

but today is a new day. I have a most beautiful family (with a new baby due any moment) and I have so many reasons to clean up. But everyday I tell myself that I can quit tomorrow.

I'm wore out.

any good advice?
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Old 02-15-2010, 08:39 AM
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I'm new and just starting myself, but I know the cycle all too well. Typically, I felt like quitting while I had a hangover, but just as soon as it faded I was right back at it.

I also have young kids, and told myself I'd quit when they were born, when their birthdays rolled around, etc, etc, but never stuck to it.

I did have to quit for me. It's for the family, too... but it didn't do any good to quit for them if I didn't even tell them.

Reach out for help. You'll definitely get it here.

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Old 02-15-2010, 08:46 AM
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Hi Tex,

What helped me in the early days was changing my routines. Do things at different times. If you are normally home drinking at 3pm on Sunday, go out. Go for a walk, spend time with your family, do something different that helps you to break the pattern of your drinking.

I'm glad you're back and trying again!
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Old 02-15-2010, 09:11 AM
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If what you've been doing isn't working, maybe it's time to try something new. Have you considered any of the recovery programs? Something like AA or SMART or LifeRing? Might be worth a try. And yes, changing your routine is a good idea.
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Old 02-15-2010, 09:30 AM
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Originally Posted by BigTex View Post
I'm wore out.

any good advice?
You are worn out from fighting it. Stop fighting. Will power and good intentions are often not sufficient. Do you believe that you are alcoholic?

Welcome to SR!!

Mark
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Old 02-15-2010, 09:34 AM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
 
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Glad you are making a fresh start for sobriety.

I see recovery miracles in every AA meeting
I attend and in my mirror.
God uses us to help others.
Have you considered checking out AA?

Blessings to you and your family....
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Old 02-15-2010, 09:51 AM
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Originally Posted by BigTex View Post
i'm back to give this another try. any good advice?
Glad you're back Tax. Been there done that.

They told me "You can continue to beat yourself up hopelessly, or you can just do like so many of us did."

In my experience fully conceding to this paragraph was the toughest part:

p. 44
"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic. If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer."

But once we do we quit beating ourselves up......

Three suggestions:

1.
a. Honesty: We go tell people who drank like we did that we are drinking like they did.
b. Open-Mindedness: We listen closely with open ears to their experience and what has worked for them.
c. Willigness: We become willing to "do" what they did to recover.

2.
a. Go to meetings
b. Get a sponsor
c. Work the steps

3.
a. Trust a God
b. Clean house
c. Help others

It's worked for me since I started working for it.
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Old 02-15-2010, 10:55 AM
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thank you all.
1pm and doing ok. can feel the urge coming on, but am steadfast today. if i can make it to 6pm, i'm home free................for today.
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Old 02-15-2010, 11:32 AM
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Go ask the Multivax
 
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In case you're not going to meetings -

Ya slipped, no big deal. But, perhaps it's time to pull that on-line directory and give it an honest whirl.

Get to it. <whipflash>
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Old 02-15-2010, 12:58 PM
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Welcome back Tex
My advice? Make a commitment every day not to drink - but don't be like me dfor so many years - I let that be the end...it should really be only the beginning.

Make the commitment - and then do everything you can to ensure you keep that commitment.

If that means physically making yourself go to meetings, physically changing your routines, physically being aware of your thought processes, and posting here for help to get through them - do all that.

Do all that and more
I guarantee you'll be glad you did BigTex

D
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Old 02-15-2010, 01:36 PM
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wow. so here it is 330pm, and i am fighting off every justification on earth for drinking. It's beautiful outside today, work has been a beast, i'm going to be cooking up some steaks tonight, and cause I can always start tomorrow.

THIS SUCKS.

I know it will get easier, but sheesh, I can barely make it thru one day!!

Help!!
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Old 02-15-2010, 01:46 PM
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Nothing changes if nothing changes Tex.
To make the change you need a day one....

keep posting here
D
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:53 PM
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Originally Posted by BigTex View Post
wow. so here it is 330pm, and i am fighting off every justification on earth for drinking. It's beautiful outside today, work has been a beast, i'm going to be cooking up some steaks tonight, and cause I can always start tomorrow.

THIS SUCKS.

I know it will get easier, but sheesh, I can barely make it thru one day!!

Help!!
this might sound "dum" but try it,....when you have an urge,...each a chocolate bar. An old timer in AA told me this and it worked,...something in chocolate actually calms the cravings.
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Old 02-16-2010, 03:17 AM
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Woohoo! I did it!
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Old 02-16-2010, 01:39 PM
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Originally Posted by BigTex View Post
Woohoo! I did it!
one day at a time
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