I think Im better now.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
I think Im better now.
Im think Im better now. What do you think?
Should we take a poll? LOL.
Been reading lots of the other posts and its helped me put my stuff in perspective. Compared to what some of you have gone thru Ive had it easy.
These months are always bad for me. I think I got a toxic build up from keeping everything inside. A lot of its out Now. Arent you the lucky ones? LOL.
Its nice to be able to talk and just be me.
Thanks.
Ps
I get whinny again around Christmas and New years Eve/ my Bd.
Should we take a poll? LOL.
Been reading lots of the other posts and its helped me put my stuff in perspective. Compared to what some of you have gone thru Ive had it easy.
These months are always bad for me. I think I got a toxic build up from keeping everything inside. A lot of its out Now. Arent you the lucky ones? LOL.
Its nice to be able to talk and just be me.
Thanks.
Ps
I get whinny again around Christmas and New years Eve/ my Bd.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Baltimore,MD
Posts: 150
Hey...I feel lucky!
Anytime I see someone say they feel better, just because they were able to get it out and express how they feel...it makes ME feel even better.
Hang in there and keep coming back. This place and al-anon have been so wonderful.
OH and you are not whinny! Christmas and New Years are tough on everyone but at least now, you have somewhere to hang out and dump it all, so that you can move on and enjoy the holidays.
Anytime I see someone say they feel better, just because they were able to get it out and express how they feel...it makes ME feel even better.
Hang in there and keep coming back. This place and al-anon have been so wonderful.
OH and you are not whinny! Christmas and New Years are tough on everyone but at least now, you have somewhere to hang out and dump it all, so that you can move on and enjoy the holidays.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: georgia
Posts: 531
GREAT....so glad that you are feeling better! We all come here and whine at some point or another. We takes turns whining and then we take turns telling how we have successes. That is what is so wonderful about everyone here!
Constant
Constant
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: That's what I'd like to know.
Posts: 2,416
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=2759
That's just an example of some of the silliness that goes on around here at holiday time, Cecelia. Maybe we can help distract you a little when the time comes.
That's just an example of some of the silliness that goes on around here at holiday time, Cecelia. Maybe we can help distract you a little when the time comes.
Paused
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: california
Posts: 15
feel great!
I feel a whole lot better. For the first time in my life, I can honestly say I like living with just the kids and I, and I don't have to put up with living with an A anymore. Its all about ME now and what I want.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
Thanks muchly everyone.
Smoke that was a hoot.
Ive been told that I have way too much humour for my own good. If I get out of hand just hold me down. LOL. He on the other hand has none. I probably drove him to drink. LOL.
I am so bad. The other day I asked him if they rattled their cups on the bars_and sang Nobody Knows The Trouble Ive seen. He was not amused. Poor thing its hard on him now. I am so me now that its scaring him.
I told him that if I was there Id be making the most of a bad situation. It never helps to fret over what you cant change. It just gets your knickers in a twist and then you walk funny.
Tried to get him to take autoshop etc. He says hes too busy and he doesnt want to be a mechanic. I said doing what. You have plenty of time. You dont have to be a mechanic but wouldnt it be nice to know what their talking about when we take the car in for service. You got a lot of found time now. Take some courses. Get some Mexican dude to learn you to speak Spanish. Make original greeting cards instead of spending cash.
Hes not all bad. He may just surprize me and grow up yet. He tells me that theres a lot of guys in there who dont read and write. He writes letters for them and reads the ones they get. He said that a lot of people charge them to do this. Boy! How selfish can you be.
I dont think Ill ever be all better. And Im not sure I want to be. These are MY quirks, theyre what make me Me. Some of my weaknesses ae only weaknesses cause I take them to extreme. I dont have to be the one in contol but I need to learn not to let others control me either.
Im still up to some of my old tricks. I know_I should tell his family to stick it in their ear. Im still working on being able to disagree without waiting till Im pushed over the edge. I know if I say one thing to them Ill say it all and Ill scorch their eyebrows off. Once I reach that point Im done with you. I gots to work on this all or nothing stuff.
Smoke that was a hoot.
Ive been told that I have way too much humour for my own good. If I get out of hand just hold me down. LOL. He on the other hand has none. I probably drove him to drink. LOL.
I am so bad. The other day I asked him if they rattled their cups on the bars_and sang Nobody Knows The Trouble Ive seen. He was not amused. Poor thing its hard on him now. I am so me now that its scaring him.
I told him that if I was there Id be making the most of a bad situation. It never helps to fret over what you cant change. It just gets your knickers in a twist and then you walk funny.
Tried to get him to take autoshop etc. He says hes too busy and he doesnt want to be a mechanic. I said doing what. You have plenty of time. You dont have to be a mechanic but wouldnt it be nice to know what their talking about when we take the car in for service. You got a lot of found time now. Take some courses. Get some Mexican dude to learn you to speak Spanish. Make original greeting cards instead of spending cash.
Hes not all bad. He may just surprize me and grow up yet. He tells me that theres a lot of guys in there who dont read and write. He writes letters for them and reads the ones they get. He said that a lot of people charge them to do this. Boy! How selfish can you be.
I dont think Ill ever be all better. And Im not sure I want to be. These are MY quirks, theyre what make me Me. Some of my weaknesses ae only weaknesses cause I take them to extreme. I dont have to be the one in contol but I need to learn not to let others control me either.
Im still up to some of my old tricks. I know_I should tell his family to stick it in their ear. Im still working on being able to disagree without waiting till Im pushed over the edge. I know if I say one thing to them Ill say it all and Ill scorch their eyebrows off. Once I reach that point Im done with you. I gots to work on this all or nothing stuff.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
If you think about it you just gotta chuckle. Theres a lotta funny stuff going on all around us if we just look for it.
I know why his family is so MEAN. Ive decided theyre all dry drunks with gas. LOL.
Seriously. I gotta work on that. They bother me more than all the other people put together. When I know I have to be with them it changes my whole outlook. Its like all my alkie copeing has shifted to them. I dont like that crabby whinny angry woman I become. Shes no FUN.
My relationship with him is a lot better. He still tries to make me mind occasionally but I just tell hm to back off.
I like your Alanon saying. Dont say it mean. Its the way Ive always tried to be. Just didnt realize there was a saying that fit. Comes in handy when you dont like conflicts. LIke me. I can state my case and get someone to do what I want without a fight. More flies with honey......
I know why his family is so MEAN. Ive decided theyre all dry drunks with gas. LOL.
Seriously. I gotta work on that. They bother me more than all the other people put together. When I know I have to be with them it changes my whole outlook. Its like all my alkie copeing has shifted to them. I dont like that crabby whinny angry woman I become. Shes no FUN.
My relationship with him is a lot better. He still tries to make me mind occasionally but I just tell hm to back off.
I like your Alanon saying. Dont say it mean. Its the way Ive always tried to be. Just didnt realize there was a saying that fit. Comes in handy when you dont like conflicts. LIke me. I can state my case and get someone to do what I want without a fight. More flies with honey......
Supply Manager
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Cleaverville
Posts: 2,898
I can state my case and get someone to do what I want....
Oh yeah I remember! That's what sent me screaming into Alanon to start with.
Hugs,
JT
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
I didnt say I say I get the Huz to do what I wanted. We wouldnt be chatting here if I could. LOL.
Im wondering now if I didnt do BOTH of us a disservice by letting him manipulate me into letting him always have his way. Look at all the trouble my "kid" got into cause I gave in when he threw "tantrums". At the very least I wouldnt be here dealing with his ratty family. LOL. I might have even found someone who appreciates SciFi and my sense of humour and who hates sports. LOL.
If I really wanted to get the Huz and his buds going I would ask them "Do you know Football is a gay sport?"
Im wondering now if I didnt do BOTH of us a disservice by letting him manipulate me into letting him always have his way. Look at all the trouble my "kid" got into cause I gave in when he threw "tantrums". At the very least I wouldnt be here dealing with his ratty family. LOL. I might have even found someone who appreciates SciFi and my sense of humour and who hates sports. LOL.
If I really wanted to get the Huz and his buds going I would ask them "Do you know Football is a gay sport?"
a work in progress
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Cobourg, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 54
Cecilia
I just wanted to say I'm glad you came here and I'm glad you're feeling better. I haven't been posting very much, but I've been reading everything you've posted. I can identify with so much you've typed, the "outlaws" especially LOL I've got a million stories about the hoops they've had me jump thru to try and please them. They still don't talk to me since I separated from their son, although I heard they've been trying to find a way to take the kids away from me... I'm such an unfit mother.... yeah.. whatever.
Once again, so glad you're here and keep coming back!
To one Midwestern SciFi loving RedHeaded Codie from an Eastern SciFi loving Redheaded Codie LOL
P.S. Just wondering if Cecilia is your real first name? Mine is a variation on it... here goes... mine isn't Mysty... lol.... bout time I coughed it up... my first name is Sheila
Hugs
Sheila
I just wanted to say I'm glad you came here and I'm glad you're feeling better. I haven't been posting very much, but I've been reading everything you've posted. I can identify with so much you've typed, the "outlaws" especially LOL I've got a million stories about the hoops they've had me jump thru to try and please them. They still don't talk to me since I separated from their son, although I heard they've been trying to find a way to take the kids away from me... I'm such an unfit mother.... yeah.. whatever.
Once again, so glad you're here and keep coming back!
To one Midwestern SciFi loving RedHeaded Codie from an Eastern SciFi loving Redheaded Codie LOL
P.S. Just wondering if Cecilia is your real first name? Mine is a variation on it... here goes... mine isn't Mysty... lol.... bout time I coughed it up... my first name is Sheila
Hugs
Sheila
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
Ive always felt you have to be my friend to hurt my feelings. Thats why what the other people do doesnt stick for long. Besides I know its not personal. And some of them are just stupid.
The Outlaws on the other hand thought I was the "Bees KNees" for 30 years. Well I still got the same knees. So does that mean they NEVER liked me. LOL.
I dont think yours can take your kids. They usually dont let Inlaws have them unless the Moms are REALLY bad. You dont beat yours and leave marks do you?
The Outlaws on the other hand thought I was the "Bees KNees" for 30 years. Well I still got the same knees. So does that mean they NEVER liked me. LOL.
I dont think yours can take your kids. They usually dont let Inlaws have them unless the Moms are REALLY bad. You dont beat yours and leave marks do you?
a work in progress
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Cobourg, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 54
Beat my kids? no... but some days.... lol kidding.
My Outlaws were the same way... I was the "daughter they never had". I brought the kids to see them every summer for 2 weeks, 9 hour trip one way, plus nearly every holiday, x-mas was usually the only time their son came with us. I was usually counted on to cook holiday meals for the parties she threw when I was there. Her husband had a riding accident 3 years ago and broke his neck, not paralized, but had one of those halo's they screw into the skull. She's an RN, but couldn't take the time off to look after her husband ( yes she could, she had lots of holidays saved up) So could I please come for the summer and look after him ie; help him shave, make his meals, give him his meds, change his t-shirts under the support vest, feed the cows, cut the hay, rake it, bail it, haul it home... I could go on. Aren't I just the best little Codie? LOL I can't believe I actually did all that.... I'm 100% city bred. Now they have the nerve to slam me for leaving thier son... oh gee.. I guess they didn't like loosing thier doormat. Nevermind that mom in law has asked her son for years "if he thought he might have a wee lil drinking problem?"
Ummm... so why does she deny it now? Oh well... whatever makes her feel better. I dont' believe she really wants to take the kids anyway, she's called them exactly 5 times since we moved away. It's a good way to make her look like the concerned gramma tho, she likes to play the Martyr.
Sorry to go on, the "outlaws" are still a touchy subject for me LOL But I'm the same way you are, you burn me once and goodbye, unfortunately when it's family you don't have that luxury.
Hugs
Sheila
My Outlaws were the same way... I was the "daughter they never had". I brought the kids to see them every summer for 2 weeks, 9 hour trip one way, plus nearly every holiday, x-mas was usually the only time their son came with us. I was usually counted on to cook holiday meals for the parties she threw when I was there. Her husband had a riding accident 3 years ago and broke his neck, not paralized, but had one of those halo's they screw into the skull. She's an RN, but couldn't take the time off to look after her husband ( yes she could, she had lots of holidays saved up) So could I please come for the summer and look after him ie; help him shave, make his meals, give him his meds, change his t-shirts under the support vest, feed the cows, cut the hay, rake it, bail it, haul it home... I could go on. Aren't I just the best little Codie? LOL I can't believe I actually did all that.... I'm 100% city bred. Now they have the nerve to slam me for leaving thier son... oh gee.. I guess they didn't like loosing thier doormat. Nevermind that mom in law has asked her son for years "if he thought he might have a wee lil drinking problem?"
Ummm... so why does she deny it now? Oh well... whatever makes her feel better. I dont' believe she really wants to take the kids anyway, she's called them exactly 5 times since we moved away. It's a good way to make her look like the concerned gramma tho, she likes to play the Martyr.
Sorry to go on, the "outlaws" are still a touchy subject for me LOL But I'm the same way you are, you burn me once and goodbye, unfortunately when it's family you don't have that luxury.
Hugs
Sheila
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
Bloods always thicker........
I can talk about my family but if you say the same thing. Watch out.......
You should offer to send the kids for a visit. LOL.
We dont have any kids. And nobody in their right mind would want custody of our hyperactive Rottenweiler child.
I can talk about my family but if you say the same thing. Watch out.......
You should offer to send the kids for a visit. LOL.
We dont have any kids. And nobody in their right mind would want custody of our hyperactive Rottenweiler child.
a work in progress
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Cobourg, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 54
LOL @ Rottenweiler.... kids are kids in all shapes and forms. I've got 3 furless and one with fur... my little shetland sheepish dog. <whispers> and don't even dare try to tell her she's not one of my kids, she just rolls her eyes and sighs... I think she got that from my teen..... or she taught it to her first.. I'm not sure LOL
Sheila
Sheila
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 413
Mysty
My fur kids and I pass the crown to you. Ive done a lot of stuff for my outlaws but Ive never milked a cow. They look like vicious beasts to me. They have a MEAN look to them. LOL.
AS I read some of the other posts I think how lucky I am. Things are actually pretty calm here right now. I dont get into any hassles unless I go out to meet them. And even then I can walk away. Even from the outlaws. I always go there so I can leave whenever I want.
They havent set foot in this house since he went to jail. Thats why I just about lost it when I found out my SIL was telling people that Im totally alone with no support and how they were my only family and how there were taking care of me. Made me sound pitiful. LOL. From what Ive seen so far....I could use a little less of their version of "taking care of".
My fur kids and I pass the crown to you. Ive done a lot of stuff for my outlaws but Ive never milked a cow. They look like vicious beasts to me. They have a MEAN look to them. LOL.
AS I read some of the other posts I think how lucky I am. Things are actually pretty calm here right now. I dont get into any hassles unless I go out to meet them. And even then I can walk away. Even from the outlaws. I always go there so I can leave whenever I want.
They havent set foot in this house since he went to jail. Thats why I just about lost it when I found out my SIL was telling people that Im totally alone with no support and how they were my only family and how there were taking care of me. Made me sound pitiful. LOL. From what Ive seen so far....I could use a little less of their version of "taking care of".
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