vent
I Love Who I Am
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
vent
Don't you even try to insinuate I shouldn't be going to yoga you dumbass. Oh yea, I forgot, yoga is to me what drinking is to you. I'm addicted and can't stop and it's ruining my family.
It's saved your life a few times doncha know? I'm sure I would have stabbed you by now if I didn't practice. Or at least thrown the pan at your head instead of the wall.
You suck. I"m so glad I don't have to live with you anymore. YOU CAN BITE MY SWEATY ANGRY CODEPENDANT NO MORE ASS YOU PATHETIC JERK!!!
It's saved your life a few times doncha know? I'm sure I would have stabbed you by now if I didn't practice. Or at least thrown the pan at your head instead of the wall.
You suck. I"m so glad I don't have to live with you anymore. YOU CAN BITE MY SWEATY ANGRY CODEPENDANT NO MORE ASS YOU PATHETIC JERK!!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,888
What did he do, try to say you are addicted to healthy, stress relieving, zen inducing, and body conditioning persuits????
Maybe it's true.....maybe you are....
Doesn't matter if you're addicted to cat urine, transform. What blinkin' matters is what you bring to the table in your relationships.
He's an alcoholic.
That part we've established as true.
What he brings to the table is what you're feeling now...gnarly, hairy, good for nothing, cheating on your wife, useless, and blinding RAGE! He brings it to the table and he puts your face right in it.
I'm not going to tell you not to speak to him. I'm not going to tell you to detach and have compassion. I'm not going to tell you to turn your recovery inward. Because you know what...all of that is obvious to you at this stage.
I'm going to ask you instead....what can you do to keep yourself from going homicidal on this man??? When the BS gets this deep into your head, what can you do to get rid of it???
If it weren't for cutting my XABF out completely and blocking him from contacting me, I think eventually I would have blown.
I need to know you're going to be okay my friend. I don't want to see you on the next season of SNAPPED
Alice
Maybe it's true.....maybe you are....
Doesn't matter if you're addicted to cat urine, transform. What blinkin' matters is what you bring to the table in your relationships.
He's an alcoholic.
That part we've established as true.
What he brings to the table is what you're feeling now...gnarly, hairy, good for nothing, cheating on your wife, useless, and blinding RAGE! He brings it to the table and he puts your face right in it.
I'm not going to tell you not to speak to him. I'm not going to tell you to detach and have compassion. I'm not going to tell you to turn your recovery inward. Because you know what...all of that is obvious to you at this stage.
I'm going to ask you instead....what can you do to keep yourself from going homicidal on this man??? When the BS gets this deep into your head, what can you do to get rid of it???
If it weren't for cutting my XABF out completely and blocking him from contacting me, I think eventually I would have blown.
I need to know you're going to be okay my friend. I don't want to see you on the next season of SNAPPED
Alice
I Love Who I Am
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
Oh Alice, you're a gem.
Is this a real show? I don't have TV so I'M painfully ignant of pop culture.
I'm fine. The way you don't see me on Snapped is for me to -go to yoga and - vent here instead of interacting with him.
I speak to him as little as possible, only when I need to and we're still dividing up and moving out stuff so it's a little tough right now. The last of it (hopefully) is getting moved tomorrow. and to be truthful, he has done a majority of the packing, cleaning and moving. While drinking. While I work and take care of the kids.
I just wanted him to watch the kids tomorrow when they get out of school so I could work and go to yoga. He got snarky and I just said, "if you don't want to commit to watching them, that's fine just tell me."
He agreed. It's all so insidious, his passive aggresive BS. He told me a few months ago that I was "addicted" to yoga like he is alcohol, which is insane. Yoga makes me calm, happy, organized, healthier in every sense of the word.
So that was just a little vent. Yes, a brutally angry vent with several references to physical violence, even a few threats to kill him I think.
But I won't, really, Darling. No, really. Those days are over. And in fact, my anger is over. Venting here instead of talking to him is very very effective.
Especially after seeing your post.
I need to know you're going to be okay my friend. I don't want to see you on the next season of SNAPPED
I'm fine. The way you don't see me on Snapped is for me to -go to yoga and - vent here instead of interacting with him.
I speak to him as little as possible, only when I need to and we're still dividing up and moving out stuff so it's a little tough right now. The last of it (hopefully) is getting moved tomorrow. and to be truthful, he has done a majority of the packing, cleaning and moving. While drinking. While I work and take care of the kids.
I just wanted him to watch the kids tomorrow when they get out of school so I could work and go to yoga. He got snarky and I just said, "if you don't want to commit to watching them, that's fine just tell me."
He agreed. It's all so insidious, his passive aggresive BS. He told me a few months ago that I was "addicted" to yoga like he is alcohol, which is insane. Yoga makes me calm, happy, organized, healthier in every sense of the word.
So that was just a little vent. Yes, a brutally angry vent with several references to physical violence, even a few threats to kill him I think.
But I won't, really, Darling. No, really. Those days are over. And in fact, my anger is over. Venting here instead of talking to him is very very effective.
Especially after seeing your post.
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,888
Phew!! That's good to hear!
As long as you can get yourself back to center and back to sanity that's what really matters.
Yeah, SNAPPED is a real show about real women who are charged with violent crimes. Some are crimes of passion. Others are in self defense. Others are by madness, jealousy, or pent up emotion. The one thing they all have in common is that you would never suspect it from them if you knew them and the only way to comprehend it is to say they just...snapped.
My XABF would growl at me when he saw me watching the show that it only gave me ideas on how to bump him off. I used to give it right back to him saying that I watched SNAPPED for the good ideas, and criminal investigation shows to remind me just how hard it would be to get away with them.
Near the end when I wanted my XABF to do something while I went out and he would ask why, I would tell him I was going to see...here it comes...truely silly... "Noneya." That would prompt the "Noneya who" response. To which I smartly replied, "Noneya Business."
After a couple of rounds of this, he got the jist and stopped asking me who, what, and where and just agreed to do the desired task or not. I wasn't about to give him ammunition to belittle me with or suffer any of his ignorance about my life. I just hate that snarky alcoholic BS!
Transform, as they say, you're recovery is showing!!!
Alice
As long as you can get yourself back to center and back to sanity that's what really matters.
Yeah, SNAPPED is a real show about real women who are charged with violent crimes. Some are crimes of passion. Others are in self defense. Others are by madness, jealousy, or pent up emotion. The one thing they all have in common is that you would never suspect it from them if you knew them and the only way to comprehend it is to say they just...snapped.
My XABF would growl at me when he saw me watching the show that it only gave me ideas on how to bump him off. I used to give it right back to him saying that I watched SNAPPED for the good ideas, and criminal investigation shows to remind me just how hard it would be to get away with them.
Near the end when I wanted my XABF to do something while I went out and he would ask why, I would tell him I was going to see...here it comes...truely silly... "Noneya." That would prompt the "Noneya who" response. To which I smartly replied, "Noneya Business."
After a couple of rounds of this, he got the jist and stopped asking me who, what, and where and just agreed to do the desired task or not. I wasn't about to give him ammunition to belittle me with or suffer any of his ignorance about my life. I just hate that snarky alcoholic BS!
Transform, as they say, you're recovery is showing!!!
Alice
I Love Who I Am
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,210
Ugh, I can't believe there is actually a television show like that. TV freaks me out.
You're a good friend Alice, I"m sorry if I freaked you out. Remember, I'm the PTSD poster child of SRFF, so yes, I do have moments of rage but thanks to three days in a row of yoga, it's totally managible. Or however that's spelled.
And your XABF's snarky comments sound just like mine! Hmm. Another common denominator that illustrates how a) we're not alone and b) A's are not unique. It's all a formula. And guess what! I know that formula now! Ha!
Do not engage, even when you're angry and want to. Vent if you've gotta, but let it go quick like a bunny. Then, it goes away. Poof. And I can focus on my happy little life again. Beautiful..
You're a good friend Alice, I"m sorry if I freaked you out. Remember, I'm the PTSD poster child of SRFF, so yes, I do have moments of rage but thanks to three days in a row of yoga, it's totally managible. Or however that's spelled.
And your XABF's snarky comments sound just like mine! Hmm. Another common denominator that illustrates how a) we're not alone and b) A's are not unique. It's all a formula. And guess what! I know that formula now! Ha!
Do not engage, even when you're angry and want to. Vent if you've gotta, but let it go quick like a bunny. Then, it goes away. Poof. And I can focus on my happy little life again. Beautiful..
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,888
quick like a bunny
Right back down the rabit hole...exactly!!
You are right about the formula. Sometimes the bits and pieces are different, but it is amazing to me how may times I read a post and feel those butterflies in my stomach and some old feelings bubble up like acide reflux. Urrgh.
But with time and work, and the good people here, I spend very little time feeling that way anymore.
Wooosh, right back down that hole it goes. Buh-Bye!
Alice
Right back down the rabit hole...exactly!!
You are right about the formula. Sometimes the bits and pieces are different, but it is amazing to me how may times I read a post and feel those butterflies in my stomach and some old feelings bubble up like acide reflux. Urrgh.
But with time and work, and the good people here, I spend very little time feeling that way anymore.
Wooosh, right back down that hole it goes. Buh-Bye!
Alice
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