ice17

I have told you guys about my dads drinking etc, but i have never touched on my moms drinking. Despite the problems i have had with my dads drinking, he has now been sober for 3 years. But after he got sober, the spotlight began to shine on my moms drinking. For years my mom and dad would get drunk, but my dad was the one who binge drank and fought etc, so it is only when he stopped drinking that i began to focus on my moms drinking. My dad admitted he was an alcoholic long before he actually stopped drinking. He accepted the fact that he had a problem and made an attempt to fix it.

But the problem with my mom is the fact that even when she knows she is wrong, she brushes it off. If she gets drunk and does something, the next day she will brush it off or if you nag her about it, she will blithely say 'sorry' and expect you to forget it. Secondly is the fact that she seems to have control over her drinking to a degree. She wont get drunk in front of her brother because he doesnt drink. Thats not to say she wont come home and continue drinking, but she tries to maintain a facade. Also, no one really knows how bad she gets when she comes home. She will be all smiles in front of her friends, but then comes home and fights with my dad or occassionaly me. Then when we make a fuss when she is sober, she will 'behave' for a while, meaning she wont get plastered and fight, but she will still drink and act silly.

She will also insist she is right even when she is wrong and people are telling her that she is wrong. Tonight for example she argued with me about a trip i took 10 years ago! My dad told her she was wrong and she just kept arguing that she was right, even when we tried to explain to her that logically she could not be right! This went on for 1 hour!. I am telling you this because she also wont admit she has a problem of any kind. She insists that we are exaggerating and my dad is trying to spoil her fun because he no longer drinks. But then sometimes when she drinks she acts tipsy but normal and that makes me doubt my sanity because then i wonder if maybe i am over reacting.

I also feel sorry for my dad in this respect, because as a recovering alcoholic, it is very difficult to have a wife that gets drunk and doesnt consider how it makes you feel. You can only help a person that admits that they have a problem. But she just refuses to believe what her own family is telling her.

Thanks to all of you for your support.