supportforme

AH is staying at his Mom's. I actually suggested that he remove himself and take some time to deal with his depression after he told me that "I'm coming down on him" because I question credit card charges at pharmacies and excess money out of the account. My response was - you lied, you had the affair, you're the addict. These are consequences. I choose to try to make this marriage work and support his recovery because it's in my children's best interest. I do love him; however, right or wrong- I'm trying to give this the best chance so that the man I married has a better chance at recovery. When I spoke to him today, I asked him what's the plan. He replied that he shouldn't have to tell me since he is trying to take my advice - funny - key to successful marriage is communication right? Whatever...So, for now, we tell the kids he's working nights. I was calling him just to check in and to show my support. I think I need to stop calling and let the cards fall where they may. I need to practice what I preach - I told him, this is out of my hands. I can't fix this, there is nothing I can do for him but love him. I'm a strong woman and will be able to handle this. Any advice would be appreciated. I'm glad that I have a stressful job - actually a nice outlet. Work is a walk in the park compared to dealing with this. I've been enjoying the evenings with the kids. As long as we are doing fun things, they don't ask about Dad so much. It breaks my heart b/c they used to ignore me if he was home. He's the fun one. He claims he's taking his Suboxone and just sleeping all day. Sad - life is too short.

teke

sorry you are having to go through all of this, i pray that he finds his way soon and a special prayer for you.

greeteachday

Are you checking into any Naranon or Alanon meetings? I found the face to face support and really working my own recovery helped me to stop trying to control my loved one's recovery and detach. ...to practice what I preach, as you said.

Keep reading and posting..This isn't an overnight process but we do get better, one baby step at a time.