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New to forum/old to trying and failing at sobriety

Old 10-03-2009, 12:31 PM
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New to forum/old to trying and failing at sobriety

Hi,
I'm glad to have found you. Only a few days sober and still in the process of medical detox. Have tried and failed at aa for the past 7 so that has not yet worked for me...will be there again in the coming week.
Hope this forum will be a lifeline too.
Thanks for your support
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Old 10-03-2009, 12:45 PM
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Welcome lulamay. SR was definitely a lifeline for me. I was terrified & miserable when I first found this place - still drinking too. Within a few months I had read so many wonderful stories & so much helpful advice that I got the strength to pour my last drink down the drain. I never looked back - mostly because I have a place to come to where everyone understands. I did falter a few times, but I was always picked up and set straight.

Please tell us more about yourself - and be proud for wanting a new and better life. I know you're tired of being numb & oblivious to the world around you. I decided I wanted to feel alive again - smell coffee, not beer first thing in the morning. Open the drapes, not hide & cower from the outside world. (Well, maybe you never got that bad -I'm just sayin'.) We understand how hard it is, but you can do this!
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Old 10-03-2009, 12:50 PM
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Hi Lula and welcome to SR. I had failed at rehab and not staying sober for 20+ years. Jan 07 I had finally had enough and got serious about recovery. I am now over 2 1/2 years sober. If I can do it you can too! Please stick around and let us get to know you.
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Old 10-03-2009, 01:36 PM
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Hi Lula and welcome to SR. I am newly sober having just celebrated 1 year only by the Grace of God and AA meetings. Keep in touch, you can do this.
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Old 10-03-2009, 03:24 PM
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Hi lulamay

Welcome!

SR has been a lifesaver for me too - I've found it really helps to connect with others, and to have another way of reaching out when we want that drink or drug or whatever.

Hope to see you around some more
D
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Old 10-03-2009, 04:12 PM
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Hi Lulamay, I am in much the same situation, just found this site today and still in detox. I have had one long (10yrs) period of sobriety and am committed to stopping my drinking, again! I too have struggled with the AA meeting thing. Do your best, listen to the parts that make sense to you.. if it does not make sense, don't worry about it. Hang in and good luck.
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Old 10-03-2009, 04:49 PM
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Welcome to SR! The stories and advice and support I've found here in my 14 days of sobriety has been a lifesaver. You have found a great place
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Old 10-03-2009, 05:17 PM
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Hi. I can so relate to trying over and over to stay sober. I had 13 yrs sober in and now i have been drinking again for 5 yrs. Twice in my life I have been seriously ill due to my drinking and using. It is a life threatening thing for me but still I don't stop. It's so crazy. If I don't stop now I won't live to see my grandchildren, but even that thought doesn't stop me. The insanity of it all. I thought I would try this for the support. My family believes I could use just a little more willpower and i would be alright. They don't understand. I hope someone here understands. I use the name wantohavefun because alcohol and drugs seems to be the only way I can have fun. Is there something fundamentally wrong with me. i envie other people who can laugh and have fun at the drop of a hat. But not me. I'm always so responsible except when I drink.
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Old 10-03-2009, 06:29 PM
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Hi and Welcome,

SR is definitely my lifeline and I hope you find the same thing.
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Old 10-03-2009, 06:38 PM
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Welcome!!!

Keep coming back, you'll find a lot of support here.
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Old 10-04-2009, 07:38 AM
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Thanks for all your replies.
As you'll all know, I'm sure - it's so much easier when you know you're not on your own in this.
Me?
(I'll try to keep this as brief as I can)
I'm early 30s. Drinking heavily from 17 on and off but nothing I couldn't cope with - turned into a problem in 1997.
Did numerous home detoxes then went into a Priory unit in 2000 for a detox programme. That facility has since closed.
Stayed sober for 6 months after that then slipped again. This has been pretty much the pattern with periods of sobriety between 5 and 11 months ever since. Each time I've started then stopped drinking the sickess the shakes have been harder, the visions worse and the problems I've left in my wake even more difficult to get my head round. But I'm not telling you anything here you don't already know! How awful it is. The guilt.
I'm a few days into a home detox and feeling a lot better than I did on Wednesday/Thursday. More lucid than I've done before after a few days but I've sipped water, eaten very small amounts of food, tried to keep the meds at a minimum. The grogginess is there but not as bad as the alternative.
This has got to be a changing point - how many times has that been said before?!
I've sent message to employers that I've had a bereavement (a most terrible lie -may God forgive me); my partner has told me I'm on my last chance so I stand to lose my home and the bank account is empty. Everything I've tried to work for between these awful relapses will go. And I know that. Yet, after a few months, I pick up the drink again thinking that everything will be ok. Sure enough, it isn't.

So here's the question. It can be done and I know it can because of what I've read here and people I've met in AA. But how?
I've struggled with AA. I've nothing against it but it hasn't worked for me since 2002/3 so I'm not sure if it'll start now. Or maybe thats down to my attitude towards it.
Thanks for reading this. Sorry for rambling and I hope we can all support eachother in the future. Xxx
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Old 10-04-2009, 03:57 PM
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