Relapse
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Colorado
Posts: 4
Relapse
Hi everyone. I first found this site over a year ago but did not stick with it.
Tried f2f AA and had negative experiences with 2 different groups. One wasn't very friendly, and the other had a guy in it who kind of stalked me. I was happy to see on the boards here that many have found sobreity without AA. I also don't feel comfortable with the Christian slant at AA meetings around here. (My spirituality is more Eastern philosophy.)
Wish me luck. I seem to be unable (or unwilling?) to go more than 10 days without binge drinking. Ugg! I am in self-hatred mode right now, wishing for a drink to make me feel better. How sad.
Am living an hour at a time today.
Tried f2f AA and had negative experiences with 2 different groups. One wasn't very friendly, and the other had a guy in it who kind of stalked me. I was happy to see on the boards here that many have found sobreity without AA. I also don't feel comfortable with the Christian slant at AA meetings around here. (My spirituality is more Eastern philosophy.)
Wish me luck. I seem to be unable (or unwilling?) to go more than 10 days without binge drinking. Ugg! I am in self-hatred mode right now, wishing for a drink to make me feel better. How sad.
Am living an hour at a time today.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
Hi Sunny,
I am glad you're back.
It's such a vicious cycle to be caught up in the self-hatred, and then drinking to ease those feelings, and of course back to the self-hatred. I thought I would never get out of that mess. But, you can do it! Make one small change and it can have a ripple effect in your life. You can do this!
I am glad you're back.
It's such a vicious cycle to be caught up in the self-hatred, and then drinking to ease those feelings, and of course back to the self-hatred. I thought I would never get out of that mess. But, you can do it! Make one small change and it can have a ripple effect in your life. You can do this!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,372
Hi Sunnydog 
Welcome.
SR can be a great help to you - it is to me...recovery's a lot of hard work, but the rewards are so worth it
If you like, check out our Sept thread - full of ppl who quit this month...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html
and our two weeks and under thread, full of people just starting off, like yourself
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-9-a-5.html
Hope to see you around
D
Welcome.
SR can be a great help to you - it is to me...recovery's a lot of hard work, but the rewards are so worth it
If you like, check out our Sept thread - full of ppl who quit this month...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-2-a.html
and our two weeks and under thread, full of people just starting off, like yourself
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-9-a-5.html
Hope to see you around
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Living in Today!
Posts: 3,944
Originally Posted by sunnydog 
Hi everyone. I first found this site over a year ago but did not stick with it.
Tried f2f AA and had negative experiences with 2 different groups. One wasn't very friendly, and the other had a guy in it who kind of stalked me. I was happy to see on the boards here that many have found sobreity without AA. I also don't feel comfortable with the Christian slant at AA meetings around here. (My spirituality is more Eastern philosophy.)
Wish me luck. I seem to be unable (or unwilling?) to go more than 10 days without binge drinking. Ugg! I am in self-hatred mode right now, wishing for a drink to make me feel better. How sad.
Am living an hour at a time today.
Tried f2f AA and had negative experiences with 2 different groups. One wasn't very friendly, and the other had a guy in it who kind of stalked me. I was happy to see on the boards here that many have found sobreity without AA. I also don't feel comfortable with the Christian slant at AA meetings around here. (My spirituality is more Eastern philosophy.)
Wish me luck. I seem to be unable (or unwilling?) to go more than 10 days without binge drinking. Ugg! I am in self-hatred mode right now, wishing for a drink to make me feel better. How sad.
Am living an hour at a time today.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 89
I hope you find hope here.
I'm sorry you had such negative experiences with face to face meetings. That doesn't mean you should stop looking for them though!
I understand your inability to find solace in the non-secular modes of recovery. The 12 step process, unfortunately, includes this as a fundamental step, which severely turned me off of it. Just remember that you are the single most important agent of your own change. Either you do it, or you do not. That's really all it all comes down to. I know it may seem impossible and difficult and a HUGE up-hill battle...but if you don't do it...who will?
Make the change happen that you want to see in your life.
Good luck and keep posting!
I'm sorry you had such negative experiences with face to face meetings. That doesn't mean you should stop looking for them though!
I understand your inability to find solace in the non-secular modes of recovery. The 12 step process, unfortunately, includes this as a fundamental step, which severely turned me off of it. Just remember that you are the single most important agent of your own change. Either you do it, or you do not. That's really all it all comes down to. I know it may seem impossible and difficult and a HUGE up-hill battle...but if you don't do it...who will?
Make the change happen that you want to see in your life.
Good luck and keep posting!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WA Perth
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hi Sunnydog
and our two weeks and under thread, full of people just starting off, like yourself
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-9-a-5.html
D
and our two weeks and under thread, full of people just starting off, like yourself
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-9-a-5.html
D
Thanks Dee47 didnt know that was available
LOLLooking For Myself...Sober
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
I think the first thing you need to do is find that self love inside you. You have to love yourself and believe in yourself if you are to succeed in anything.
Dont focus on the past, the negative, what you cant fix.
Start clean. Literally.
Nothing that has happened matters. It may cause some issues in the future. But you take it as it comes and always remember that that was then and this is now. Just stay the course and do the right thing and things will fall into place.
And always keep trying. I cant stress that enough. I dont care if you fall a million times. You get up a million and one.
Welcome back.
Dont focus on the past, the negative, what you cant fix.
Start clean. Literally.
Nothing that has happened matters. It may cause some issues in the future. But you take it as it comes and always remember that that was then and this is now. Just stay the course and do the right thing and things will fall into place.
And always keep trying. I cant stress that enough. I dont care if you fall a million times. You get up a million and one.
Welcome back.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
