sarah5256

I have been with the love of my life for over two years he has been dealing with alcoholism. We were living together and after a night of drinking he came home (we live together) and said he had to leave and get help. He packed everything up and left to get help. HE said he really cares about me and does not want to hurt me anymore. He said I am doing this because I love you. HE said he can't be in a relationship while he does this. I really love him and want to be with him although I understand he has to do this alone. I want to be by his side but I guess I dont know how to. What is calling too much? can we still have a relationship and no that we can not be intimate but i think going to church together is a good start but I dont know any suggestions

GiveLove

Sarah, I'm so sorry about this. It must hurt a lot.

I can't offer any suggestions -- he has the right to make choices for his own life. He's evidently chosen to go off on his own, for reasons only he knows. If he wanted you by his side, he would be allowing you to do that...it appears he's decided against it.

I'm just sorry those decisions are really painful for you right now. Big hugs to you to get through this and get on with your life

naive

hi sarah-

i think it's loving of him to want to spare you the slow torture of living with an alcoholic. that would be great if he's gone to get help and embraces recovery. if he sobers up and loves you, he will be back when he feels he can be a good partner for you.

perhaps he's been down this road already and can see that he needs to do his work solo. recovering alcoholics understand that their sobriety must come first, above everything else, even those we love, because if they don't get sober, they will loose everything.

i would give him his space and get on with your own life in the meantime. alanon could be helpful for you to deal with your feelings and also, to help you understand alcoholism.