millieveronika

I posted yesterday regarding my drinking and needing to stop. Thank you for all of your kind replies.

I had been drinking all weekend but stopped around 6 pm last night. I did not sleep well and felt shakey until a few hours ago. I was sweating during the night and felt itchy.

I was actually wrong about how much I drank, I thought a fifth was smaller - I was drinking about a third of a fifth (350-375 ml) of vodka per day for the past about year... Prior to that I was drinking everyday but about half of that. Even though it is not a whole fifth a day it is still waaay too much. I know I should have gone into a detox place for help medically but I needed to go to work and (and also - that was not fun).

Tonight I am going to walk my dogs, maybe do the lawn (I have neglected it for so long - usually a guy that lives in the downstairs apartment in my house does it - however I just found out he is sick and on chemo - so I think being hungover is no longer an excuse).

I've detoxed before this summer - I am now scared of how much I drink and realizing that my life is just stuck - so I tried to "slow down" and not drink for a few days - but when I would return I would drink more than ever and over the past few weeks I have finally admitted I cannot drink. Period.

I know that physically I will feel better tomorrow. I know how peaceful it will be to fall asleep reading a good book and not chugging vodka, I am looking forward to it. I know it will be scary but I am remembering all the AA slogans (there is alot of addiction in my family so I know what I need to do). Tomorrow I hope to make it to a meeting. Thanks for all of your support, such inspiring stories...

Anna

Hi,

I think it would be a good idea to talk to your dr about detoxing. It can be dangerous for you. It's great that you know you can no longer drink and now you can begin your recovery.

Dee74

I agree with Anna about the Dr and detoxing.

Even tho it's not a fifth, it's still over moderate levels - I'm not an American, but you were drinking at least 5-6 times more than the recommended amount here (50 ml of spirits = 2 units) for women.

D

tallcactus

So now U have admitting that U R powerless. Good for U! R U tried of beating that dead :horse ? Now go to step 2!!
:ghug3 2 U. Doing great, but seek medical help, 4 a safe detox.
Stay strong.

millieveronika

Thanks for the insight, I know I should have seen a doctor. I was terrified of getting in trouble with work, dumb, so I just kinda stuck out the day and kept to myself - but I guess until I read through some of these I didn't realize that it could be lethal. This is probably the third time over the past six months that I have detoxed like this, scary. I am going to try and sleep but will talk with a doctor tomorrow. I've always lied to doctors and therapists so this should be interesting. Maybe it will actually do some good...

I haven't memorized the steps yet so I had to pull out the blue book. I like step 2. :-) My mom has this saying everywhere - relax, God's in charge - one of my favorites. Too bad I have forgotten to do that for the last however years...

Thanks to everyone, have a good night.

bt1978

millieveronika:

Thanks for sharing and for being here. Your story reminded me of mine in some ways (I came into recovery/sobriety because I spent 3 days drinking...I think about 10 bottles of wine). Sleeping sucked at first (either I was sooo tired or up til all hours...) but at almost four months....I love what it feels like to fall asleep naturally (or not fall asleep at times). It has been one of my favorite things in sobriety.

I pray you get to enjoy those experiences (sober) again and again!

Blessings and Peace (and delightful rest!)
BT