Why are you angry?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
Why are you angry?
Quote of the Week, from The Wisdom of the Rooms
In the old days (before recovery), a lot of people, places and things really upset me. I resented my family for always trying to tell me what to do (thinly veiled as, "We're just trying to help you."). Schools, jobs, or any other institution that tried to dictate my behavior also upset me. I guess you could say I was pretty angry before I got sober. (Am I still angry?)
When I entered the rooms there were a whole new set of "rules" to follow (thinly veiled as suggestions), and I transferred my rebellion and resentment to them. After 90 days I was still pretty angry when my sponsor told me something I didn't get at first, but which is a principle I now live by. He told me that whenever someone or something made me upset, it was always because there was something spiritually unbalanced in me.
What I've come to understand today is that whenever I get angry, resentful or upset in anyway, I can almost always trace it back to self-centered fear.
I'm either afraid I'm going to lose something I have or not get something I think I deserve.
When I'm spiritually centered, however, and close to my Higher Power, I realize I already have everything I need and that essential completeness can never be taken away.
Today when someone upsets me off I realize they are just teachers, and I begin looking within for the lesson.
In the old days (before recovery), a lot of people, places and things really upset me. I resented my family for always trying to tell me what to do (thinly veiled as, "We're just trying to help you."). Schools, jobs, or any other institution that tried to dictate my behavior also upset me. I guess you could say I was pretty angry before I got sober. (Am I still angry?)
When I entered the rooms there were a whole new set of "rules" to follow (thinly veiled as suggestions), and I transferred my rebellion and resentment to them. After 90 days I was still pretty angry when my sponsor told me something I didn't get at first, but which is a principle I now live by. He told me that whenever someone or something made me upset, it was always because there was something spiritually unbalanced in me.
What I've come to understand today is that whenever I get angry, resentful or upset in anyway, I can almost always trace it back to self-centered fear.
I'm either afraid I'm going to lose something I have or not get something I think I deserve.
When I'm spiritually centered, however, and close to my Higher Power, I realize I already have everything I need and that essential completeness can never be taken away.
Today when someone upsets me off I realize they are just teachers, and I begin looking within for the lesson.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: scotland
Posts: 1,493
complete identification 1 day @ a time!,,oh my goodness,this is my biggest character defect,,,there have been a few days since i got on the programme when things have got,,,how shall i put it? messy (stop trying to run the show Charmian!!!!!!) quick inventory and guess what,,,,all stems back to SELF SEEKING FEAR! it is the thing i have to pray and work on the most.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,385
Your post reminds me of one of my all time favorite songs. It's titled The Balance and it is by the Moody Blues. Here are the lines I am particularly reminded of...
And he thought of those he angered,
For he was not a violent man,
And he thought of those he hurt,
For he was not a cruel man
And he thought of those he frightened
For he was not an evil man,
And he understood.
He understood himself.
Upon this he saw that when he was of anger or knew hurt or felt fear,
It was because he was not understanding,
And he learned compassion.
And with his eye of compassion
He saw his enemies like unto himself,
And he learned love.
Then, he was answered.
Thanks 1day. And thanks to you too Anna...wise words to live by.
And he thought of those he angered,
For he was not a violent man,
And he thought of those he hurt,
For he was not a cruel man
And he thought of those he frightened
For he was not an evil man,
And he understood.
He understood himself.
Upon this he saw that when he was of anger or knew hurt or felt fear,
It was because he was not understanding,
And he learned compassion.
And with his eye of compassion
He saw his enemies like unto himself,
And he learned love.
Then, he was answered.
Thanks 1day. And thanks to you too Anna...wise words to live by.
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