Bamboozle

4 months sober. Yea! It does feel good, but...



...it hit me last night. The same thoughts I've had before about how I've always been addicted to something.



The food addiction started when I was very little.

I won't go into details, but the reason I'm upset about this now is because I've hit a plateau in my weight loss.

I'm on a pill (for depression) that cut down my food cravings and drastically cut down my appetite for about two weeks. What an unbelievable difference...and a much needed respite. I remember thinking, "so this is how normal eaters feel". It felt right.

Now the cravings and voracious appetite are back like mad. The wonderful side effect has worn off.



I wish the food problem was like the alcohol problem. I just stopped drinking. Why can't I just stop eating?

I've been this way for the longest time and I just want the madness to stop. I'm tired of feeling keyed up all the time...and it's not even over the alcohol. As bad as the alcohol was (and it was pretty bad), my food addiction is worse. It's been around much longer.

I just ate...and I could eat a lot more. I could eat until I feel sick and bloated.


I'm so tired. What can I do?


I wish my brain would shut the duck up.

Anna

Hi Bam,

I think you can look inward and try to find what it is, that you are burying. What feelings are you trying to run away from? It might be helpful to keep a journal and write down your emotions. You might be able to get a better perspective, if you do that.

Bamboozle

I'm going to go for a walk...

jamdls

Walking sounds like an excellent idea! Whenever I've given up smoking (I'm a serial quitter!) I try to arrange to do things or be places that I wouldn't have smoked anyhow. Obviously since I'm a serial quitter it hasn't worked for me long term but I figure even if I only quit for a month here and there it is ultimately good for me.

Bamboozle

I'm back...went for a brisk walk for an hour.

Now I'm tired and a little sore. Craving went away after about 20-30 minutes of walking.

I was really anxious earlier...I get like that...even though I'm tired most of the time. I think I burned off my energy.

I've lost weight countless times and have always gained it back. I don't want to fail again.

Earlier I was ready to eat my hand (really...I kept putting my fist in my mouth instead of food) ...now the urge has passed.

FightOn

I will not even attempt to think that I know what you are going through as I am an alcoholic, but my wife is the same as you describe. She could sit down at 4 in the afternoon and eat until she goes to bed at 11 pm. I do not if you cook but what has worked for her is cooking healthy. It is amazing how much food you can eat if you cook yourself and buy healthy food. The calories really do not add up if what you are eating is a little more healthy than usual.

Again, I am an alcoholic who burns calories like an arsonist so take my advice for what it is worth. Keep at it, I wish you the best.

Tazman53

Bamboozle one of my daughters is a recovering anorexic, kind of the exact opposite of what you speak of, she is working a good program and has been doing well since she got out of rehab over a year and a half ago, we talk recovery every once in a while, she says that Anna still talks to her some times but she just blows her off now.

There is a guy I know in the rooms who has found his solution for alcoholism in AA and his solution to his over eating disorder in OA. We were talking last week and he said that the over eating took him a lot longer to gain control over for the exact reason you mentioned, one has to eat and learn how to control it.

He said combining AA & OA has been what has worked for him.

I will be honest and say I am thankful that I am not an over eater, it is one thing to totally abstain from alcohol, it would be pure hell for me to have to just have 2 beers a day!!!

It may prove benificial for you to check out OA, I have no idea how thier program goes, but as with AA where it is one alcoholic helping another alcoholic stay sober I would imagine it is one over eater helping another over eater to moderate.

Keep in mind I am not speaking from experience here, I am just sharing what some one in your boat shared with me.

Philly

Hi Bam,

I know exactly how you feel. Exercise helps alot. I lose all craving while exercising. Even though I was exercising everyday and eating health I still had about 15lbs that I had retained during my drinking career. Weight watchers helped me lose it. If I stayed within the points and ate filling foods I lost the weight rather quickly. There are some tricks which I am always learning. I think there is a site here too about Food Addiction. I will say that now I am totally addicted to exercise which is not good either. I just don't think moderation is part of my vocabulary. Read all you can. I read something in the Oprah about it is all in the brain. The aniexty brings on the fight/flight mentality and then we want to eat.

Bamboozle

This is what sucks about it. Maybe if I walk every single time I get the urge...maybe the urges will decrease.

Thanks, folks. I do want to be healthy...but I don't want to be fat anymore. I would like to find out what it feels like for me to be at a weight that fits my body type. I'm a bit stocky anyway, so I'd be happy weighing about 160 lbs. I think that would look good for me...and it's realistic.

Gypsy Feet

The old weight watchers program "core" lets you eat til you are full, round the clock. It helped me lose 50#. The food is just so crappy and bland you end up not over eating much haha

<3

Dee74

(((Bam)))

D

KenL

((Bam)), are you saying what I think you're saying? This is from Sweets79's thread on sugar. I hope you're just referring to "giving in" to the sugar and not something worse.

tallcactus

I'm an RN, my friends are mostly nurses. One nurse that I'll call Betty, just started a new antidepression drug. Has gain about 25 pounds. Actually, she looks good, since I thought she was a little to thin, like me, (that's another story, always struggled with my weight and also on the thin side; if I miss a meal, I can actually lost a pound or two and this is no way that I'm bragging here.)
Look up this drug, talk with you Doctor and continue with the walks. You are doing just great, YOU'RE SOBER!

Gypsy Feet

She's sober Ken, just on to the next fight>< Progress not perfection

((((bam))))

I love you girl!!

Bamboozle

It was the chocolate I gave in to. I'm still sober.

I'm just disappointed in myself is all. I'm trying to balance everything out...but I know where all the hiding spots are for junk at home (I live with family). I was doing well yesterday and then I gave in. I notice I usually give in when I'm not feeling well emotionally...

tallcactus

Emotions were for me ad still are triggers. Another day sober for you and I Bam.

Aysha

I have always been an over eater too Bam. But it didnt start to stick until after I lost my pregnancy.
And really packed it on in the height of my addiction.
The crack diet back fired on me. I gained over 100 lbs smoking and running in the streets for days at a time. But I would also go home and starit sleep for days too and just constantly eat. Because I didnt eat for most of those days high. I did this for years.

I am still struggling with my weight and is one thing I gained from my addiction that I want gone so bad.
Now that the summer moneth are here. I have been trying to go ride my bike for a little while every few days. I am not a walker. I can ride a bike all the time and enjoy it. Swimming and volleyball too.
Find some easy on hand things to do that are active and that you enjoy.
I know once I get going and feeling "the burn" and the active movement. I feel so good.
But getting to that point is hard. I have a hard time getting my big butt up and just starting sometimes.
But once I am going. it feels good and my apetite goes away.
Just start putting small activities into your day at a time.
Even at work. I have to walk back and forth and up and down stairs alot during the day. So I use that as a little mini workout. LOL
When your out taking your pics.
Find a way to put some exercise into it as well as your looking for your shots.
I agree that the eating is way harder than the crack addiction for me.
Hang in there my friend.

coffeenut

Hey, Bam....I've said many times being an overeater would be so much harder than being an alcoholic. You can live w/o alcohol.

Weight Watchers worked for me. Taught me what a serving size actually looked like. Kept me accountable with the scale. It really is a good program. I got to my goal weight.....gained it all back. Took it off again....and added exercise, the weight has stayed off.

Like others have said....You're Sober! For FOUR Months! Awesome, cool.

As you travel on this journey finding balance is so difficult. I think you're doing great. And I wish you the very best.