5Fingaz

My ah is very up and down. By that I mean one minute she cant keep her hands off me telling me she loves me every 5 min. Other times it seems she cant stand the sight of me. Its like Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hide. What is this? I dont get it... anyone else have experience with this behavior from their ah?

Still Waters

Not in exactly those terms no. Mine told me to get out, yet has tracked me where ever I went. Tells friends we have an anniversary coming up, in the same sentence that he boasts about "repossessing" my vehicle in the middle of the night (I "stole" it from him you see).

What do your AG's actions and my AH's actions have in common? Crazy. You cannot make sense of crazy, don't even bother trying..it's futile.

MeHandle

Yes, the Dr. and Dr. is a very common saying on these threads, very!!!!!!!!!!!! My AH has even said it of himself, both sober and drunk.

Keep reading, you see what they are Dr. And Dr. over, and the answer will be pretty much everything.

Mine believes me to be one of the most wonderful wifes a man could have and then holds resentments towards me bigtime, for my sex life before we were married,( I married him at 19) and for telling him "F#*& You" once during our marriage. I can't even remember what year I said it.

TakingCharge999

yes of course. one hour ex was abusing, saying i was a coward, a loser, etc the next hour he was crying his heart out saying i did not deserve that treatment, to promise him i was going to be happy "even" without him, that he was "truly sorry" next binge he was treating me badly again. yup. expected.

my error has been to think he was the "good one" jekyll and alcohol turned him into hyde.

now i know he just acted as jekyll in order to grab an enabler. they are both jekyll and mr hyde. alcohol just shows who they really are, without masks.

for many of us, hyde is unacceptable, thus we need to get faraway from them, and keep the memories of their jekyll side in us. i guess that longing never fades... at least for me.

you cant pick up one aspect of their personality or excuse it with "its the alcohol". a person is described by her or his acts. when ex said i drank too, i answered "yes, but i have not and would never hurt you regardless of how sober or drunk i am"

my therapist said, in the end its about how they TREAT you, its not a matter of 2 beers or one bottle of wine or whatever, its the remarks, the way they see you, the way they treat you, the way they care about you... or the way they ignore you or take their frustrations out with you or lie to you or make you feel invisible...

smacked

In the scheme of things, does it matter?

Are you ok with it?

Is this what you want in a relationship?

MeHandle

oops, Dr. and Mr.