Hiya, Just putting it all out there.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 4
Hiya, Just putting it all out there.
I just decided yesterday that I was going to stop drinking. I've been thinking about it on and off for the past few days. Recently my drinking has increased and I was starting to wake up and think about later on that evening when I would be able to have a drink. I always drank after my kids go to sleep (my husband works evenings) and it was a sort of escape for me in the evenings. Before my kids I was an occasional drinker, maybe on the weekend I would have glass of wine or a beer with some friends, but never during the week because I thought it would interfere with my lifestyle at the time. (I was in the Marine Corps, so we had early PT frequently, and I took PT very seriously and didn't want to fall out because of a few beers the evening before.) Later, after I married my husband, and had my son I would drink on the weekends occasionally, but only a few drinks. I became pregnant again with my daughter, and after I had her I started drinking a beer a day (At this time I became a stay at home mom after I got out of the military) to help with my milk supply. My husband worked evenings and my daughter woke up frequently so I had to keep my wits about me so I only had 1 drink an evening... Well the drinks slowly increased until this point, where I was drinking 5-6 beers, or 4-5 generous glasses of wine an evening. I noticed my tolerance increased, and it took more to get a buzz. When alcohol started popping up in my head at 9 AM I decided maybe I should take a break... but I didn't. Finally yesterday I asked my husband (who drinks on the weekends with me while we hand out after the kids are asleep) who has control over his drinking, meaning he can have 1 and stop, or not have one at all even if it's in the fridge, if he would quit with me. I just don't want my kids growing up the way I did, my mother was an addict (pills, or methadone) and an alcoholic, and I saw myself going down that path. I'm not sure yet if I will never take a drink again, but I do know I don't want to drink anytime soon. I'm hoping my husband will stand by me with this but I'm scared he isn't taking me seriously. I never have been fall down, blackout drunk, or even in front of him (or while I'm at home with my kids) so he thinks I'm fine and I just need to cut back. I'm nervous if I keep drinking I will become a blackoutfalldown drunk. I feel like I'm at a point now where I can make a choice to stop, or it's going to get ugly. I don't know if I'm an alcoholic, but if I have to ask myself that question, surely I have a problem.
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Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: norwich, uk
Posts: 80
Welcome sarcasma
Your problem sounds exactly like mine except I wasn't in the Marine Corps. My reason for giving up was my sons. My Husband (who doesn't live with me, but I see nearly every day) is the same as yours, but he is supporting me.
Show him what you have written here, tell him you are serious, who buys the beer?
Good luck on what ever path you choose
Your problem sounds exactly like mine except I wasn't in the Marine Corps. My reason for giving up was my sons. My Husband (who doesn't live with me, but I see nearly every day) is the same as yours, but he is supporting me.
Show him what you have written here, tell him you are serious, who buys the beer?
Good luck on what ever path you choose
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Welcome to SR Sarcasma, I have a feeling that if your husband does not have a problem that as long as there is no booze in the house, he will support you without even knowing it. If you really are ready to stop drinking you can do it with or without his support, it is easier if ones spouse supports one, but it has been done with out spousal support.
Just do it one day at a time, simply make a commitment to not drink TODAY, do not worry about tomorrow.
Just do it one day at a time, simply make a commitment to not drink TODAY, do not worry about tomorrow.
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
Good morning, Sarcasma. That was a great post, and wise of you to look down the road ahead and see what's coming. How I wish I could go back and change the path I took. I never saw what I was doing to myself when I was younger, always made excuses and promises to myself to moderate, & of course it never happened. 25+ yrs. of hard drinking cost me dearly in every area of my life. This never has to happen to you.
It was the whole tolerance thing that I didn't get. I honestly thought each time I sobered up and got my head together - then allowed myself to have a few drinks - I was starting over from scratch in terms of damage & tolerance. I went from getting a buzz from 2 beers, to the ability to drink a 30 pack of beer all by my little self in a day. My innocent few drinks to have fun resulted in 24/7 drinking to maintain a certain level of booze in my system so I wouldn't fall apart. The way you describe your growing tolerance, it's likely you'd be headed that way too. I would've laughed at anyone who told me where I'd end up.
I'm glad you're here, please let us know how it's going.
It was the whole tolerance thing that I didn't get. I honestly thought each time I sobered up and got my head together - then allowed myself to have a few drinks - I was starting over from scratch in terms of damage & tolerance. I went from getting a buzz from 2 beers, to the ability to drink a 30 pack of beer all by my little self in a day. My innocent few drinks to have fun resulted in 24/7 drinking to maintain a certain level of booze in my system so I wouldn't fall apart. The way you describe your growing tolerance, it's likely you'd be headed that way too. I would've laughed at anyone who told me where I'd end up.
I'm glad you're here, please let us know how it's going.
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Dallas, Tx
Posts: 2,405
Welcome to SR Sarcasm. Congratulations on coming to the conclusion that even if you don't have a problem now you could be heading for one, most of us don't realize that until too late. I'm an adult child of an alcoholic and I think we are somewhat predisposed to follow in our parents footsteps, if not genetically at least by "nurture" so recognizing this can help with prevention.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 4
Thank you everyone for your support! I talked to my husband a bit last night, and I think he is taking me seriously now. He is definitely willing to stop drinking to help me. My main problem now is finding something to do with myself after my kids go to bed (normally I would drink my beer or wine and read a book). I tried iced lemon water, and I think tea will help to. It's almost like I still need to be drinking some form of liquid to keep my mind from thinking about having a beer. Totally strange, almost like when I quit smoking. I don't find myself missing the buzz, just the act of drinking it. I did wake up with a flat stomach because I wasn't bloated from 5 beers, so that made me happy for sure. I also found out the insane cost of preschool, so there's another reason to stop drinking... saving money so my son can learn the alphabet for 420 dollars a month! Thank you so much, this has been so relieving to overshare like this.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: NC
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by greebobeebo 
Welcome sarcasma
Your problem sounds exactly like mine except I wasn't in the Marine Corps. My reason for giving up was my sons. My Husband (who doesn't live with me, but I see nearly every day) is the same as yours, but he is supporting me.
Show him what you have written here, tell him you are serious, who buys the beer?
Good luck on what ever path you choose
Your problem sounds exactly like mine except I wasn't in the Marine Corps. My reason for giving up was my sons. My Husband (who doesn't live with me, but I see nearly every day) is the same as yours, but he is supporting me.
Show him what you have written here, tell him you are serious, who buys the beer?
Good luck on what ever path you choose
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