self-love
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Join Date: May 2008
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self-love
No, this is not about something naughty 
Not that kind of self-love - lol
Anyway, something hit me like a bolt of blue this morning. Maybe it's because I re-read a MySpace blog I wrote after watching the show Intervention (see my earlier post on this)
this is the crux of the whole issue and why I can no longer stay with my axbf any longer.
I love myself way too much to stay with someone who is destroying himself.
I care about my own wellbeing way too much to continue to endure the stress, hurt, and pain my xabf's drinking has caused me.
It's that simple.
Not that kind of self-love - lolAnyway, something hit me like a bolt of blue this morning. Maybe it's because I re-read a MySpace blog I wrote after watching the show Intervention (see my earlier post on this)
this is the crux of the whole issue and why I can no longer stay with my axbf any longer.
I love myself way too much to stay with someone who is destroying himself.
I care about my own wellbeing way too much to continue to endure the stress, hurt, and pain my xabf's drinking has caused me.
It's that simple.
Getting to my HAPPY PLACE!
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Virginia
Posts: 298
I love myself way too much to stay with someone who is destroying himself
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Join Date: May 2008
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Yep, I hear ya.
You're from Virginia? Me too!
You're from Virginia? Me too!
Originally Posted by lovtolaff 
That is probably the main reason I ended my relationship with xabf. Not only was he destroying himself - but I was destroying MYSELF by staying caught up in the drama and turmoil.
Power is not having to respond
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Wabbit Hole
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Originally Posted by sandrawg
I love myself way too much to stay with someone who is destroying himself.
I care about my own wellbeing way too much to continue to endure the stress, hurt, and pain my xabf's drinking has caused me.
A jug fills drop by drop
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,784
after i realized my own quacking, i loved him, quack quack, i loved him so much, quack and putting the mirror infront of me i realized i am not very close to loving anyone as i do not love myself. self love is vital, no wonder i have been so unstable all these years! i feel self love is the key to sanity and health. thank you for this thread!
i realized the same thing you realized, after 9 months of mourning LOL i guess some of us are slow learners
i realized the same thing you realized, after 9 months of mourning LOL i guess some of us are slow learners
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Join Date: May 2008
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You're welcome!
Originally Posted by TakingCharge999
after i realized my own quacking, i loved him, quack quack, i loved him so much, quack and putting the mirror infront of me i realized i am not very close to loving anyone as i do not love myself. self love is vital, no wonder i have been so unstable all these years! i feel self love is the key to sanity and health. thank you for this thread!
i realized the same thing you realized, after 9 months of mourning LOL i guess some of us are slow learners
i realized the same thing you realized, after 9 months of mourning LOL i guess some of us are slow learners
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
In my early recovery days, I was babysitting my niece, who is just a funny, smart, loving, thoughtful kid -- gives out lots of hugs, gets along with others without caving, takes care of herself. I had a blinding flash of love for this kid, my brother's daughter, and I realized that in that moment, I could personally kill, with my bare hands if necessary, anyone who tried to hurt her. That moment of fierce love was frightening and exhilirating.
When I was home again, locked in the drama and chaos of living with an alcoholic/drug addict/sex addict, while writing in my journal I had an epiphany: I did not love myself in the same way. I wasn't willing to defend myself, and my own right to be serene and happy, the way I was willing to defend my niece. I allowed bad things to happen in my life because I didn't love myself enough to say no to them.
It was a huge moment in my awakening from the nightmare of codependency.
After many years, I can finally say that I would protect my own happiness with the same ferocious efforts I'd use to defend my niece. Finally.
Thanks for this thread, sandrawg!!
When I was home again, locked in the drama and chaos of living with an alcoholic/drug addict/sex addict, while writing in my journal I had an epiphany: I did not love myself in the same way. I wasn't willing to defend myself, and my own right to be serene and happy, the way I was willing to defend my niece. I allowed bad things to happen in my life because I didn't love myself enough to say no to them.
It was a huge moment in my awakening from the nightmare of codependency.
After many years, I can finally say that I would protect my own happiness with the same ferocious efforts I'd use to defend my niece. Finally.
Thanks for this thread, sandrawg!!
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