Tough Days Ahead

Old 06-29-2009, 07:10 PM
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Tough Days Ahead

I'm anxious for this week to be over. Tomorrow will be two years since my XABF's dad died of cancer. This coming Sunday my ex and I would have celebrated 6 years together. I thought he was going to propose during Christmas and instead he met some one else and broke up with me. At the time I didn't know about the new girl and thought our separation was for the best since his drinking had gotten to be too hard to handle. He continued calling, texting, and emailing me alternating between telling me what pills the new girl took and how she was scary and evil and asking if he got sober would I give him another chance. I finally had enough and changed my number and email. We had lived together and when I moved out I did not tell him where my new place was. After I changed my number I gave in twice and called him with my number blocked. I have gone 81 days with no contact! I don't want to give in this week so am just looking for some extra encouragement. I am spending the holiday weekend with my family who lives 2 and a half hours away. I even scheduled to take Monday off work so I could stay with my family an extra night and wouldn't have to spend Sunday night alone. The sadness does get better, but around these memory-filled times I miss the man I feel in love with six years ago.
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Old 06-29-2009, 09:48 PM
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It looks like you are taking great care of yourself! Try to enjoy the time with your family as much as you can!
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Old 06-29-2009, 11:31 PM
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Congratulations on getting a day off work, and going 81 days with no contact -- most excellent! Yay! Hope it's a fun & relaxing long weekend with those who love you.
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Old 07-01-2009, 09:53 AM
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Thanks Kimmie and Covington. I made it through yesterday and it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. I went to work, the gym, took my dog fora walk, went to dinner, worked on some reports I had due and gave my Doha bath. Then last night I dreamt about the ex. Can't remember much of the dream but it dealt with running into him and finding out he was already living with someone else. When I woke up the negative depressed feelings were back. I know I have no idea what he is doing or feeling so who's to say he is happy. I just know I am not happy today. Sometimes I feel such doubt about myself and mourn the loss of him. On good days I realize the relationship I was in is not the relationship I want to be in forever.
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