Day 3 Can it be part of the healing process
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 98
Day 3 Can it be part of the healing process
Here I am at Day 3
Giving it all to God to help me.
I was exhausted over the weekend.
Trying to get to the root of my problems.
Sexual molestation as a child
Abandonment issues/Mother died when I was very young
Neglected child/Father to busy to take care of all the kids
Made fun of/dirtygirl,hair messy, no clean clothes, no new clothers
Unhappy marriage
Married the wrong person, who does not love me.
Why are all of these things in my head?
I never thought about the sexual molestatation before this weekend.
Can it be part of the healing process
To accept it and move on?
I need to take care of me.
To take care of that little girl that was neglected
I will be 50 years old this year, and these feelings have been festering for 42 years. I have been an acoholic for 32 years, but just admitted and wanted change in the last 4 years.
This time, I am throwing everything I have at my sobriety and taking care of myself. It is time, to take care of me.
Giving it all to God to help me.
I was exhausted over the weekend.
Trying to get to the root of my problems.
Sexual molestation as a child
Abandonment issues/Mother died when I was very young
Neglected child/Father to busy to take care of all the kids
Made fun of/dirtygirl,hair messy, no clean clothes, no new clothers
Unhappy marriage
Married the wrong person, who does not love me.
Why are all of these things in my head?
I never thought about the sexual molestatation before this weekend.
Can it be part of the healing process
To accept it and move on?
I need to take care of me.
To take care of that little girl that was neglected
I will be 50 years old this year, and these feelings have been festering for 42 years. I have been an acoholic for 32 years, but just admitted and wanted change in the last 4 years.
This time, I am throwing everything I have at my sobriety and taking care of myself. It is time, to take care of me.
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
WELCOME!
glad you are here, the admitance is critical, then acceptance.
most of us have plenty to see & feel when we get sober & start the process of recovery.
stick around........and give serious thought to formal recovery.
I'm alive today because of that!
glad you are here, the admitance is critical, then acceptance.
most of us have plenty to see & feel when we get sober & start the process of recovery.
stick around........and give serious thought to formal recovery.
I'm alive today because of that!
Disposable Hero
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Being, ME
Posts: 3,758
It is normal for the disease of addiction/alcoholism to get you to focus on the negative aspects of your past. It is trying to get control of your life again in this way because thats how it works to isolate us from life in the here and now. i have a similiar past as you have shared and just like you, i don't want to resort to drinking or drugging to help me feel better about those things that have happened. The Twelve Steps offer a better solution to those problems.
Have you given any thought to attending A.A. or N.A. meetings?
Give yourself a break and let the past stay in the past for now. Concentrate on staying clean & sober!
Have you given any thought to attending A.A. or N.A. meetings?
Give yourself a break and let the past stay in the past for now. Concentrate on staying clean & sober!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
Yes, I do think it's part of the healing process.
Alcoholism is a symptom and we need to deal with the problems that lie beneath the surface.
I had avoided dealing with my life issues for much of my adult life, not by drinking, but by being controlling and over-busy. Eventually those things stopped working and I did begin to drink. What I found when I began to recover, was that all the problems and issues were still there and I had no choice but to work through them.
You can do this and hopefully you can be gentle with yourself as you go through the process of growing and recovering.
Alcoholism is a symptom and we need to deal with the problems that lie beneath the surface.
I had avoided dealing with my life issues for much of my adult life, not by drinking, but by being controlling and over-busy. Eventually those things stopped working and I did begin to drink. What I found when I began to recover, was that all the problems and issues were still there and I had no choice but to work through them.
You can do this and hopefully you can be gentle with yourself as you go through the process of growing and recovering.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,476
I think it can be some of that Ladyb.
For me, I sabotaged myself. I was much more afraid of succeeding, than failing. I felt more comfortable failing, sad as that sounds. I really had to give myself permission to know that I could recover.
But, I do think you need to deal with the issues that are on your mind, so that you feel more comfortable with where you are in your life.
For me, I sabotaged myself. I was much more afraid of succeeding, than failing. I felt more comfortable failing, sad as that sounds. I really had to give myself permission to know that I could recover.
But, I do think you need to deal with the issues that are on your mind, so that you feel more comfortable with where you are in your life.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 5
Originally Posted by TheLadyb 
Here I am at Day 3
Giving it all to God to help me.
I was exhausted over the weekend.
Trying to get to the root of my problems.
Sexual molestation as a child
Abandonment issues/Mother died when I was very young
Neglected child/Father to busy to take care of all the kids
Made fun of/dirtygirl,hair messy, no clean clothes, no new clothers
Unhappy marriage
Married the wrong person, who does not love me.
Why are all of these things in my head?
I never thought about the sexual molestatation before this weekend.
Can it be part of the healing process
To accept it and move on?
I need to take care of me.
To take care of that little girl that was neglected
I will be 50 years old this year, and these feelings have been festering for 42 years. I have been an acoholic for 32 years, but just admitted and wanted change in the last 4 years.
This time, I am throwing everything I have at my sobriety and taking care of myself. It is time, to take care of me.
Giving it all to God to help me.
I was exhausted over the weekend.
Trying to get to the root of my problems.
Sexual molestation as a child
Abandonment issues/Mother died when I was very young
Neglected child/Father to busy to take care of all the kids
Made fun of/dirtygirl,hair messy, no clean clothes, no new clothers
Unhappy marriage
Married the wrong person, who does not love me.
Why are all of these things in my head?
I never thought about the sexual molestatation before this weekend.
Can it be part of the healing process
To accept it and move on?
I need to take care of me.
To take care of that little girl that was neglected
I will be 50 years old this year, and these feelings have been festering for 42 years. I have been an acoholic for 32 years, but just admitted and wanted change in the last 4 years.
This time, I am throwing everything I have at my sobriety and taking care of myself. It is time, to take care of me.
I'm not an alcoholic, but alot of my family members are... here is some of my story...
molested by my drug addicted mother
family did nothing to stop it or intervene
father commit suicide when I was 5
neglected by parents and family
often harrassed in school
raised poor, no new clothes either
married a person who was familiar to my original upbringing (also unloved)
Here is what I did. I did not choose to be a victim. I chose instead to survive and fight for the life I knew I deserved. I did not choose to get drunk and escape my problems and create new problems for my family and friends. I chose to heal myself and create a family that was different than the one I grew up it. I chose to take responsibility for my choices and when I was unhappy in my marriage, I acknowledged MY part in it and did the work to change it. I found a way to forgive those who hurt me as a child and even thank them for playing the roles they did for my spiritual growth.
We all have pain and are exhausted. "god" however you define "it" only helps those who help themselves. Day 3 or Day 500, part of the healing process is losing the blame and self pity and owning your life and being responsible for yourself.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 98
BAck from my AA meeting and it really hit home.
I want what these people have.
The peace, and success, the love, and the companionship
Today it the only day I have
Today I will not be a victim
Today I will not cloud my light with alcohol
Just for today, I can make it through
Thank you friends for your kind words
Thank you for everything that you give me,
I read all of your comments and print them so I an read them outside of the boards too.
Thanks
I want what these people have.
The peace, and success, the love, and the companionship
Today it the only day I have
Today I will not be a victim
Today I will not cloud my light with alcohol
Just for today, I can make it through
Thank you friends for your kind words
Thank you for everything that you give me,
I read all of your comments and print them so I an read them outside of the boards too.
Thanks
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