Update-Less Frustrated

Old 06-19-2009, 08:33 PM
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Update-Less Frustrated

STBXAH (emphasis on "soon") signed the papers today. It was a bit of a passive agressive move on his part to wait until the day AFTER court, but hey, at least he did it. I held my ground on what I was willing to compromise on. It was submitted by affidavit to the court today and will be finalized as soon as the judge signs off.....probably Monday!

He called today to let me know how serious he is about his sobriety and how great he is doing. He told me how many days he has, and that he is working on 4000 (days of sobriety), because he is never taking another drink again. Feels like a bunch of hooey to me. I hope he does make it. I hope he never takes a sip of alcohol again. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I was thinking that a person in recovery would not go around saying they were never taking a drink again. Oh well. none of my business. And how good it feels to know I don't have to waste another kilowatt of my precious energy worrying whether he does or not!
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Old 06-19-2009, 08:47 PM
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Smile Congrats!!

CONGRATULATIONS, Blessed4X!!


You did it! And you didn't have to buy him a pen or do it yourself!

Now you can enjoy your July 4th holiday and every holiday thereafter SINGLE. I wish you the best of luck with your family and healing and being no longer legally responsible for the XBM (Ex By Monday).




"hooey" is a funny word, btw.

~Ready!
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Old 06-19-2009, 09:30 PM
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Glad things are working out. The less time you have to worry about your STBXAH the more time you have for the kids.
Enjoy
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Old 06-19-2009, 10:15 PM
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How exciting and wonderful for you. Congrats!!!
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Old 06-19-2009, 11:42 PM
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"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I was thinking that a person in recovery would not go around saying they were never taking a drink again."

The program is meant to move one towards a spiritual awakening. The RA is to take it one day at a time, but the goal is to never drink again.
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Old 06-20-2009, 05:54 AM
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Good News!

Enjoy your weekend!
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Old 06-20-2009, 06:39 AM
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I hope you and your 4 have a wonderful weekend!
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Old 06-20-2009, 01:07 PM
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that's great news, blessed. better late than never!
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Old 06-20-2009, 04:17 PM
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Congrats on the 'paperwork' ..... just a wee FYI.........

"...Correct me if I'm wrong, but I was thinking that a person in recovery would not go around saying they were never taking a drink again..." and "...The RA is to take it one day at a time, but the goal is to never drink again..."

The 'founders,' including the first 100 (or however many there actually were), when they wrote the BB, stated...........:

"...But if you really and truly want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know that we have an answer for you..." (page 181 of BB)

To me, that 'for good and all' means 'forever' 'I will "never' drink again," and this is what I said when I started out on this recovery journey (some 8398 days ago; in three days, I'm working on day 8401--that will be 23 years--and most sobriety calculators count in days, hours, minutes, and even heartbeats--check out the one here on this site), and if anyone asks me today, I say the same thing; obviously, I can only live in today, but if asked, I quit for good and all....forever....never to drink again, and most of my recovered friends say the same thing.

Regarding the 'one day at a time' and the 24hr plan, these terms came about in the book, Living Sober, printed in 1975. For me, one day at a time or just for today (originally an NA phrase) or 24hrs; these are just too limiting for me. I heard a man tell a person who kept on relapsing (the fellow said he just couldn't seem to get more than 3-4 months sober, and then he'd relapse), well, this man asked the fellow if maybe he was only giving himself permission for those 3 or 4 months...........? eh.....? .....something to think about, anyway.


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Old 06-20-2009, 05:08 PM
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Thanks for the insight Noelle!! I think the part I'm a little cynical about is the smug arrogance, and that he has shown NO remorse or asked forgiveness for all of the pain he caused his family. I know he's very early in his recovery. I wish him and the new girlfriend he found at AA the very best......trying not to be sarcastic, but I have my own backslides every now and then.

Seriously though.....I do appreciate your words, and it is helpful for me to hear from someone who's been there.
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Old 06-21-2009, 05:07 AM
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Great news and what relief for you.
Enjoy all that life has to offer you from now.

God bless
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