Nature vs. Nuture (our DNA)
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Nature vs. Nuture (our DNA)
A couple of years ago I was really surprised, when my daughter's psychologist told her being American Indian had a hand in her temperament. I started doing some research and talk with any specialist that will give me the time of day. I've been borrowing/stealing their professional magazines, too LOL!
The Genome Project has shed so much light on us and it keeps on going. I read somewhere that 30% of our population doesn't have enough dopamine receptors. It's a genetic variant and they aren't able to learn from consequence. It's strongly linked to addiction and goes way beyond will or desire. Some addicts don't make it and this is one of the reasons why. Some people are also born with low levels of beta endorphins and that's another challenge.
Temperament is something we're born with, too. That gene was identified recently. We can't change it, cure it, control it, but we can work with it and that's the nurture part. If we're parents, we can learn our children's temperaments and tailor our responses to them from an early age, teach them how to cope. That doesn't guarantee anything though, because it's only part of the equation. When I finally learned and accepted my temperament, I was able to start some behavior modification on myself. It's a process like everyone says, and the people who love me are a gift from the heavens above. As much as I've fought my temperament, I have fought with them.
All the science we're learning about our DNA is giving us more tools. I really hope at least an overview becomes standard high school science curriculum or at least offered. Maybe it will stick in a few brains and they'll remember when they have children.
The Genome Project has shed so much light on us and it keeps on going. I read somewhere that 30% of our population doesn't have enough dopamine receptors. It's a genetic variant and they aren't able to learn from consequence. It's strongly linked to addiction and goes way beyond will or desire. Some addicts don't make it and this is one of the reasons why. Some people are also born with low levels of beta endorphins and that's another challenge.
Temperament is something we're born with, too. That gene was identified recently. We can't change it, cure it, control it, but we can work with it and that's the nurture part. If we're parents, we can learn our children's temperaments and tailor our responses to them from an early age, teach them how to cope. That doesn't guarantee anything though, because it's only part of the equation. When I finally learned and accepted my temperament, I was able to start some behavior modification on myself. It's a process like everyone says, and the people who love me are a gift from the heavens above. As much as I've fought my temperament, I have fought with them.
All the science we're learning about our DNA is giving us more tools. I really hope at least an overview becomes standard high school science curriculum or at least offered. Maybe it will stick in a few brains and they'll remember when they have children.
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Join Date: Dec 2007
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Chino- method to my madness.
Ever since my youngest started to walk/talk ....... If he hurt himself - he would get angry with what hurt him. (to this day - even with my coaching/teaching - he STILL is like this!) If he tried putting a square peg into a round hole - he'd get frustrated (not at himself) - but at the toy that was NOT working.
This is not learned. This is something he was doing before he was one years old!
Now, my oldest "knew" to take a deep breath - pause - try it again (with the peg and hole toy). If he didn't get it - he would quietly walk away. And be okay! If my oldest hurts himself - he thinks... YIKES - what can I do next time to not make the same mistake?
They are 20 months apart in age.
Ever since my youngest started to walk/talk ....... If he hurt himself - he would get angry with what hurt him. (to this day - even with my coaching/teaching - he STILL is like this!) If he tried putting a square peg into a round hole - he'd get frustrated (not at himself) - but at the toy that was NOT working.
This is not learned. This is something he was doing before he was one years old!
Now, my oldest "knew" to take a deep breath - pause - try it again (with the peg and hole toy). If he didn't get it - he would quietly walk away. And be okay! If my oldest hurts himself - he thinks... YIKES - what can I do next time to not make the same mistake?
They are 20 months apart in age.
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
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My daughter and I play a horrible game... "Try to Guess Which Younger Relative Will Be the Next Addict". I guess lots of we moms of do some of that. Daughter and I have long noticed differences in temperment amongst the next generation - even (or maybe especially) amongst those with multiple kids.
Having addiction on both sides back many generations, it is almost a given that many of the next group will walk the same path as us. And all we can do, even after all these years, is try to talk them out of ever picking up.
I wish science would catch up with itself on addiction.... give us some tools to help those thirty - forty percent who die active in their disease, and save some families from decades of turmoil.
sigh.
((hugs))
Having addiction on both sides back many generations, it is almost a given that many of the next group will walk the same path as us. And all we can do, even after all these years, is try to talk them out of ever picking up.
I wish science would catch up with itself on addiction.... give us some tools to help those thirty - forty percent who die active in their disease, and save some families from decades of turmoil.
sigh.
((hugs))
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,307
If I was independently wealthy - I would volunter speaking at high schools... doing REAL drug awareness seminars/classes/rallys. Giving out the resources... getting the word out about choice. It's a reality folks..... and these kids are wearing rose colored glasses through their upbringing..... and turning into an adult - especially when not emotionally mature to be one - drugs can be the answer.
Why do people use drugs? Because they WORK....... they increase the dopamine levels..... some people start using and have that AH HA experience - like... this WORKS! But it only works for so long before it becomes addiction. If I could teach that to high schoolers.... let them know the REALITY of it... show it to them in a different light. Show them that there are other tools out there to increase the dopamine levels, for example. And make it fun at the same time!
Nowadays you can talk to 16 years old (or younger) - like you would talk to someone who just started college!
I'm joining the middle school PTO - and I'll probably do it in HS too - so maybe I'll be able to get some kind of program going.
Why do people use drugs? Because they WORK....... they increase the dopamine levels..... some people start using and have that AH HA experience - like... this WORKS! But it only works for so long before it becomes addiction. If I could teach that to high schoolers.... let them know the REALITY of it... show it to them in a different light. Show them that there are other tools out there to increase the dopamine levels, for example. And make it fun at the same time!
Nowadays you can talk to 16 years old (or younger) - like you would talk to someone who just started college!
I'm joining the middle school PTO - and I'll probably do it in HS too - so maybe I'll be able to get some kind of program going.
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Eastern Shore, Maryland
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Chino - Thanks for this post.
A few years ago, I went to a physician whom I believe thought he was the answer to everyone's problems. He was asking about my family's history and when it came to family members with addictions, I mentioned my father - a recovering alcoholic for the past 20 years. The doctor went on to ask why I had never taken up the 'family trait' and how surprised he was that I hadn't, "Especially since you should have the gene for it within your DNA."
I told the doc that it never interested me. I watched people, from afar, who were addicted to various things and watched how it controlled and consumed them. I want control of my life and I don't want to be one of those people who wakes up the next morning going, "What happened last night? How did I get here? Dude, where's my car?" Not interested.
As far as children today, I think my generation (the Gen-x-ers), from what I've seen with my friends, are raising our children to be destructive adults. (Lord, I hope I don't offened anyone with this... hear me out...)
I have 2 boys - 10 and 5. Both of them are strong willed and at times appear to have one of the acronym illnesses - ADD, ADHD, OCD... They were tested by my ex-h who thought I created these acronymed illnesses by 6 different specialists. Low and behold they are normal, healthy, active children - he was hoping there was something wrong with them... this is why we're divorced. I am stern with my boys. I do not let them control my house or behave as their friends do - like adults. They are children. I give them the leeway to be so. When they act out of line, I quickly curb them toward behavior. I'm a drill instructor, and most of the time I am very lax. Some behavior will not be tolerated.
My best friend has a 2 year old who runs her house. Everytime she gets on the phone with me, this child is screaming in the background - death-shrill screaming. He hits her, he throws things at her, and flat out refuses to do anything she asks. My friend also refuses to discipline her child to curb this behavior. When he screams, she doesn't walk away and let him have his tantrum, she asks him what he wants and gives it to him. And the boy has been getting worse. This behavior started when he was 8 months old. I worry for her because I know he will be out of control when he is a teenager if she does not do something now.
DNA and the research surrounding it are fascinating to me. I do feel sorry for the next few generations. They are being raised in a world where 'anything goes'. They are allowed, as children, to do as they wish and then have a sense of entitlement as they grow. I wish it could all catch up to itself - the science and the study and our lives.
A few years ago, I went to a physician whom I believe thought he was the answer to everyone's problems. He was asking about my family's history and when it came to family members with addictions, I mentioned my father - a recovering alcoholic for the past 20 years. The doctor went on to ask why I had never taken up the 'family trait' and how surprised he was that I hadn't, "Especially since you should have the gene for it within your DNA."
I told the doc that it never interested me. I watched people, from afar, who were addicted to various things and watched how it controlled and consumed them. I want control of my life and I don't want to be one of those people who wakes up the next morning going, "What happened last night? How did I get here? Dude, where's my car?" Not interested.
As far as children today, I think my generation (the Gen-x-ers), from what I've seen with my friends, are raising our children to be destructive adults. (Lord, I hope I don't offened anyone with this... hear me out...)
I have 2 boys - 10 and 5. Both of them are strong willed and at times appear to have one of the acronym illnesses - ADD, ADHD, OCD... They were tested by my ex-h who thought I created these acronymed illnesses by 6 different specialists. Low and behold they are normal, healthy, active children - he was hoping there was something wrong with them... this is why we're divorced. I am stern with my boys. I do not let them control my house or behave as their friends do - like adults. They are children. I give them the leeway to be so. When they act out of line, I quickly curb them toward behavior. I'm a drill instructor, and most of the time I am very lax. Some behavior will not be tolerated.
My best friend has a 2 year old who runs her house. Everytime she gets on the phone with me, this child is screaming in the background - death-shrill screaming. He hits her, he throws things at her, and flat out refuses to do anything she asks. My friend also refuses to discipline her child to curb this behavior. When he screams, she doesn't walk away and let him have his tantrum, she asks him what he wants and gives it to him. And the boy has been getting worse. This behavior started when he was 8 months old. I worry for her because I know he will be out of control when he is a teenager if she does not do something now.
DNA and the research surrounding it are fascinating to me. I do feel sorry for the next few generations. They are being raised in a world where 'anything goes'. They are allowed, as children, to do as they wish and then have a sense of entitlement as they grow. I wish it could all catch up to itself - the science and the study and our lives.
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Studying this stuff has really opened my eyes about addiction and recovery, nature vs nuture. So many people are born with a risk taking gene but not all develop addictions, and one of those genes is also linked to ADHD. It was absolutely needed for nomadic living but is counter-productive in our sedentary lifestyle. Unless those people find a viable outlet they will need Rx drugs.
Makes me think about athletes -- the ones who aren't doping. Especially the ones from third world countries. Some of them would probably end up addicts if they grew up with the sedentary lifestyle of industrialized countries.
I've always thought addiction resulted from a perfect storm. Now I'm beginning to think "normal" comes from a perfect storm.
Recovering addicts that go on to lead a productive life just blow my mind right now. God bless them.
Makes me think about athletes -- the ones who aren't doping. Especially the ones from third world countries. Some of them would probably end up addicts if they grew up with the sedentary lifestyle of industrialized countries.
I've always thought addiction resulted from a perfect storm. Now I'm beginning to think "normal" comes from a perfect storm.
Recovering addicts that go on to lead a productive life just blow my mind right now. God bless them.
Last edited by Chino; 06-18-2009 at 10:03 AM. Reason: spelling
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My guys IS a risk taker! And he has ADD..... it's no surprise that the drugs worked for him for awhile. Or how he got caught up in it. He stopped thinking of other ways to fill that craving of risk taking.... I think he gave up on having healthy outlets.
His risks were drugs, not committing, having an affair on an airplane.....
I hope one day that he slows himself down enough to figure himself out.
His risks were drugs, not committing, having an affair on an airplane.....
I hope one day that he slows himself down enough to figure himself out.
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Renee also fascinates me and she's an example of that perfect storm I mentioned. Her environmental influences (nurture) had to be strong and powerful, and her brain during the formative years had to be running on all cylinders.
The same thing goes for my son. He carries some of the same genes of my daughter, but obviously not all of them, and his environmental influences were pretty much the same. He also hasn't had any concussions like she's had.
So many factors!!!
The same thing goes for my son. He carries some of the same genes of my daughter, but obviously not all of them, and his environmental influences were pretty much the same. He also hasn't had any concussions like she's had.
So many factors!!!
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