Coping mechanisms?
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Coping mechanisms?
As I progress in the process of, as one member put it, peeling the onion, I've discussed a few things with different members of AA and recovery counselors. The prognosis of alcoholism is a given to me, and in addition to that I've been told I may be also suffering from depression, post traumatic stress, and codependency. Seems like a very difficult set of conditions to overcome, however the choices are limited, so I'm wondering if any others here have had similar multiple conditions to consider while trying to gain a solid footing on the path of recovery and how did you deal with all of them. I'm not sure which is of utmost importance, except abstinance from alcohol and my sponsor said he is not familiar with all of the conditions well enough to help deal with them, and that's ok, he's a great help when talking about drinking specifically, which I consider my number 1 problem.
I know I am unable to cope with all of these at once, so a little guidance would sincerely be appreciated.
I know I am unable to cope with all of these at once, so a little guidance would sincerely be appreciated.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,299
Hi Firestorm.
I think it's fairly common that many alcoholics suffer from depression as well.I know I did and having been at SR for a while now and reading others posts it seems to be something many of us share.
To put it in a simple way-you really can't deal with the other things while drinking-it's like putting the cart before the horse as they say.I know I had to make not drinking my priority first-and then deal with the rest of the stuff/baggage. There's no way you can deal with depression or PTSD if you're not sober really.
So-take care of the not drinking part first is my suggestion.It's really just the beginning of the journey though.Then we have to look at our emotional stuff, how we deal with life, and create a new, better, sober one for ourselves.
Jules
I think it's fairly common that many alcoholics suffer from depression as well.I know I did and having been at SR for a while now and reading others posts it seems to be something many of us share.
To put it in a simple way-you really can't deal with the other things while drinking-it's like putting the cart before the horse as they say.I know I had to make not drinking my priority first-and then deal with the rest of the stuff/baggage. There's no way you can deal with depression or PTSD if you're not sober really.
So-take care of the not drinking part first is my suggestion.It's really just the beginning of the journey though.Then we have to look at our emotional stuff, how we deal with life, and create a new, better, sober one for ourselves.
Jules
I would suggest that for right now and the next few months, concentrate on finding and maintain sobriety. Some of the other things, ie depression may disappear as it has with many alcoholics.
Also, it says right in the BB of AA that sometimes 'professional' help is needed, and thus there is nothing wrong with seeing a therapist while you continue working on your recovery in AA.
Please Keep It Simple and concentrate on the 'primary problem' first, ie the alcohol situation.
Work with your sponsor on the steps. I think you will be pleasantly surprised at how the steps can make things clearer.
Please try not to OVER ANALYZE everything (don't feel bad, we all do it). I don't know about anyone else, but when "I seized fighting" and just started to do what was asked of me, without a lot of "yeah but's" my life got better.
Oh and BTW I am also Bi Polar. That too is now in check .................................. but I had to work on the 'primary problem' first ................................. MY alcoholism.
J M H O
Love and hugs,
Also, it says right in the BB of AA that sometimes 'professional' help is needed, and thus there is nothing wrong with seeing a therapist while you continue working on your recovery in AA.
Please Keep It Simple and concentrate on the 'primary problem' first, ie the alcohol situation.
Work with your sponsor on the steps. I think you will be pleasantly surprised at how the steps can make things clearer.
Please try not to OVER ANALYZE everything (don't feel bad, we all do it). I don't know about anyone else, but when "I seized fighting" and just started to do what was asked of me, without a lot of "yeah but's" my life got better.
Oh and BTW I am also Bi Polar. That too is now in check .................................. but I had to work on the 'primary problem' first ................................. MY alcoholism.
J M H O
Love and hugs,
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: ozstrayleeya
Posts: 2,950
Yes,I had the lot.The removal of alcohol helped almost immediately,
however I still get extremley anxious and I don't know why.Maybe I should
just simply relax and try to be a bit more positive.....Good wishes...Oz.
however I still get extremley anxious and I don't know why.Maybe I should
just simply relax and try to be a bit more positive.....Good wishes...Oz.
I use an addiction outpatient clinic where I see a therapist once a week. This is in addition to my AA program. I am so thankful I have the opportunity to see her, I can talk about a lot of issue that aren't really appropriate for AA meetings.
Although I see my therapist essentially to talk about my recovery from alcoholism, the fact is that we talk about a lot of other things: family, my marriage, my kids....I am a co-dependent for three alcoholic brothers. It is such a relief to have a place to talk about this.
Maybe you could find a counseling service in some form?
Although I see my therapist essentially to talk about my recovery from alcoholism, the fact is that we talk about a lot of other things: family, my marriage, my kids....I am a co-dependent for three alcoholic brothers. It is such a relief to have a place to talk about this.
Maybe you could find a counseling service in some form?
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Here's me. but when drinking could be found in doorways!
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Hi....
I have used lots of coping mechanisms through my life and some that have become real issues fo me....
But they were all to cover up feelings. feelings that i couldn't cope with.... from childhood....
Now i am sober i have also had to try and stop these other coping mechanisms to allow myself to fully heal....
I still struggle not to use them... my counselor calls them my escapisms.... she says we are the best escape artists ever... houdini has nothing on us :o)
I am only recently aloowing myself to FEEL... as in the last week or so and it is hard.... but if i am ever going to be free from all this i s need to work through these feelings free from any escaping behavours
I wish you luck.... please be gentle with yourself
I have used lots of coping mechanisms through my life and some that have become real issues fo me....
But they were all to cover up feelings. feelings that i couldn't cope with.... from childhood....
Now i am sober i have also had to try and stop these other coping mechanisms to allow myself to fully heal....
I still struggle not to use them... my counselor calls them my escapisms.... she says we are the best escape artists ever... houdini has nothing on us :o)
I am only recently aloowing myself to FEEL... as in the last week or so and it is hard.... but if i am ever going to be free from all this i s need to work through these feelings free from any escaping behavours
I wish you luck.... please be gentle with yourself
Well so far every thing suggested and experienced is what I have experienced and would have suggested.
One step at a time, focus on not drinking and the steps, no matter what, things will get better by simply not drinking, and even better taking the steps with your sponsor.
A therapist can not help one deal with depression if they are still drinking depressants!
If one is suffering from clinical depression then the most important thing for them to do is not drink and to see a couch doctor. Taking the steps with ones sponsor while doing this will make things far easier for all parties involved.
A lot of folks in early sobriety are prescribed ADs, some of them after taking the steps and being sober for a time get off of them and some do not.
One step at a time, focus on not drinking and the steps, no matter what, things will get better by simply not drinking, and even better taking the steps with your sponsor.
A therapist can not help one deal with depression if they are still drinking depressants!
If one is suffering from clinical depression then the most important thing for them to do is not drink and to see a couch doctor. Taking the steps with ones sponsor while doing this will make things far easier for all parties involved.
A lot of folks in early sobriety are prescribed ADs, some of them after taking the steps and being sober for a time get off of them and some do not.
Unless the depression or PTSD is getting in the way of your recovery, and I know that may be hard for you to know... I agree with everything said above. Once you get the alcohol out of your life, and you can process your emotions accurately, you may find that the depression and PTSD was either the result of alcohol or was made much worse.
If your not sure, definitely see a counselor, even if it's just once or twice. Explain why you are there... He/she may have some thoughts to help you.
But if your recovery is progressing along, get the recovery thing going, the other problems may take care of themselves.
I like what everyone said... reread Laurie's post... And Taz's... antidepressants are not unusual for those in early sobriety.
Mark
If your not sure, definitely see a counselor, even if it's just once or twice. Explain why you are there... He/she may have some thoughts to help you.
But if your recovery is progressing along, get the recovery thing going, the other problems may take care of themselves.
I like what everyone said... reread Laurie's post... And Taz's... antidepressants are not unusual for those in early sobriety.
Mark
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,876
FS, I am curious as to who told you that you may be suffering from these conditions?
If it was not a Dr. or medical professional I would take the diagnosis with a grain of salt. The power of suggestion is huge and you may be taking on things which are not true. Focus on getting sober first would be my suggestion.
If it was not a Dr. or medical professional I would take the diagnosis with a grain of salt. The power of suggestion is huge and you may be taking on things which are not true. Focus on getting sober first would be my suggestion.
There are areas on these forums for the other issues as well D. Come on over to the codependency thread (newcomers daily section) and see if the readings strike a chord in you. I believe that thread and the fine people I have met there have helped me nearly as much as putting down the bottle.
I agree with this as well
I agree with this as well
FS, I am curious as to who told you that you may be suffering from these conditions?
If it was not a Dr. or medical professional I would take the diagnosis with a grain of salt. The power of suggestion is huge and you may be taking on things which are not true. Focus on getting sober first would be my suggestion.
If it was not a Dr. or medical professional I would take the diagnosis with a grain of salt. The power of suggestion is huge and you may be taking on things which are not true. Focus on getting sober first would be my suggestion.
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Firestorm,
I tried to deal with 'my problems' of depression and anxiety for a couple of years before I got sober. Real serious can't get out of bed depression interrupted with panic attacks. Like others have said, these issues may be difficult to treat while living with active alcoholism.
Do what you think you have to do. For me, when I took the 12 steps, my depression and anxiety problems went away. Stopped taking anti-depressants somewhere around the 9th step and haven't had a need for them in a number of years. When I straightened out spiritually, I also straightened out mentally, just like the book says. At the very least, you will be in a position to deal with any other issues when you recover.
I tried to deal with 'my problems' of depression and anxiety for a couple of years before I got sober. Real serious can't get out of bed depression interrupted with panic attacks. Like others have said, these issues may be difficult to treat while living with active alcoholism.
Do what you think you have to do. For me, when I took the 12 steps, my depression and anxiety problems went away. Stopped taking anti-depressants somewhere around the 9th step and haven't had a need for them in a number of years. When I straightened out spiritually, I also straightened out mentally, just like the book says. At the very least, you will be in a position to deal with any other issues when you recover.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
I know all of you are right about the multiple issues to deal with in early sobriety, but considering that today is day six without a drink, I just want to be well now and move on with life, lol. Is that too much to ask?? Guess I'll have to give it another week or two, damn.
I guess the depression from the traumatic stress of being a codependent alcoholic is to much to resolve in a week, lol.
Seriously, I am trying to weed out the chaff and focus on staying sober, and will deal with the other issues one at a time when I'm further down the road of recovery.
Still, wouldn't it be nice to solve all these problems in a week, sometimes reality is a real kick in the a**.
I guess the depression from the traumatic stress of being a codependent alcoholic is to much to resolve in a week, lol.
Seriously, I am trying to weed out the chaff and focus on staying sober, and will deal with the other issues one at a time when I'm further down the road of recovery.
Still, wouldn't it be nice to solve all these problems in a week, sometimes reality is a real kick in the a**.
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