9Iron

Wow, I had a stressful day. I've got an incredibly complex and messed up job situation where one of the companies that I work for is being sold, and one of the owners has succeeded in hijacking all of the company information and is holding it hostage for payments into his legal defense fund (don't ask). Although last time I spoke to him he was basically trying to have me arressted for theft, all of the other partners kept me on payroll pending the sale when I will be "hired" by the new owner. I don't know if the sale is going to go through because of this shitbird, i may be out of a job there anyway. Anyway I got my check on Friday and it wasn't signed, so through an intermediary I arranged to have him sign it. He snatched it. Probably spent by now. Urrgh, just what I need with the wife in rehab and not getting paid for the next 4 plus weeks. On the other hand, the other company I represent just was awarded, solely through my expertise and experience, the project from hell which is incredibly stressful but also very lucrative. Big problem, this deal has been in the works since long before my wife went away, they start before they come back and I won't be available to them peak times due to my child care situation. Might I have to kiss that money goodbye as well? Urrgh again. Then I had to call my parents and tell them the whole situation with the wife going away, which is not an easy call to make as I'm sure some of you can imagine. Then of course I have work to do because I'm spending so much time away from the offices, and the kids don't get that, they want ice cream, gummy bears, M&M's etc. ALL EXACTLY 5 MINUTES APART! I just sit down and another kid is coming up to me asking for something else. By the time the third one is done with the first one is coming back for more. I explain that I need to get work done, but hey, Moms away, it's party time!

The difficult thing about the day was hasn't been not being able to have a drink, although at times it would have been nice to have that option. But I don't have that option, so it was simply a stressful day. Nobody ever told me that there wouldn't be stressful days when I am more comfortable with my sobriety, right? If I'm mistaken on that, please let me know right away. In fact, if I could drink right now I'm not so sure I would be all that pleasant of a guy to share a drink with. So, I'm grumpy but am also very glad that even in the 2nd day sober that I realize it's not because I can't drink. I'm grumpy because I'm grumpy. And I don't think there's a 12 step program for grumpiness right? If so, again please let me know right away.

Thanks for the vent!

marty888

Hey Mate, Sounds like you are having a tough time right now. The first 5 days I found to be the toughest, then the physical side of the cravings and the irritabilty start to ease. I have had tough times financially recently with the economic climate and have been tempted to forget it all through the drink.
The problem with that is the drink wont change anything and you still have your problems to deal with as well as feeling cr@p, guilt and remorse and the same or even worse problems.
Good work on day 2, just try and focus on the moment and dont drink for that moment.

9Iron

Thanks, Marty, you're so right that the problems will be there whether I drink or not, but especially financially how much sense does it make to spend $20 a day on alcohol? For that matter alone its a good enough idea to put it down. And no guilt or remorse, but I still will probably feel like crap for parts of another couple of days.

I'm sitting here watching a Cubs Cardinals baseball game with my boy drinking a Pepsi and eating popcorn. I actually feel pretty good at the moment.

Mark75

I know what you mean..... Probably not how you meant it though

Well, Actually.... That's kind of the whole point of the 12 step program... The steps help me work through alot of grumpiness!!

I am glad you are here posting like you are. It helps all of us!

When those kids get to you, try to remember how incredibly blessed you are. You have your kids there with you, their mother, your wife, is doing something INCREDIBLY difficult... I was in rehab for 2 months.... a very difficult, life changing event... she is doing that to get well... and be the all woman she wants to be, can be... Be very proud.

I am sure you know all that, I can tell that you love your family very much... just remind yourself how those kids love you and your wife loves you... just remind yourself of that when the going gets really tough.

Keep posting, I'm prayin' for ya!!

Mark

flutter

Yeah one thing I quickly realized when I stopped drinking, my life didn't go away.. the stress, the grumpiness, the gunk that throws me off balance.. but now I'm also not missing the simple things, excitement of a new day, knowing I'm living as healthy as possible, and I get plenty grumpy sometimes too.

Mary52

The 12 steps are not about not drinking. They are about living life on life's terms. Getting sober doesn't mean there won't be problems. It just means that you have the steps as guidance to handle them. Great job on day 2. Keep up the good job.

1_day@_a_time

Agreed the steps are not about alcohol, soooooo true!

For me to take it a bit further, it's the application of spiritual principles as a way of life. Building a whole new character, with no reference to the old.

It's a spiritual life as well as moral one.

Many of you will read this & not relate to the spiritual thingy.....& I SO relate to you, as I didn't get this way of life for nearly 50 yrs.

You don't have to wait that long to be freed from your own mind & it's destructive thinking.

Maybe you like AA, maybe you don't, perhaps you have never been for whatever reason.

What it IS for me is a way of life with compassion, tolerance, patience, forgiveness & love.

I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.........

Tazman53

Well as others have already said I will concur, in the book Alcoholics Anonymous it says that "we are not a glum lot."! You know that is so true, why in the heck would some one want to work any program if that programs results were not enjoyable?

Thanks to the program of AA & the fellowship of AA I have a real life today, not a perfect life by a long shot, but I have a lot more up times then I do down times. Today the down times I can deal with and work through them rather then try to drink them away and they just get worse.

I live a life today out side of AA that 3 years ago I never dreamed possible, the program of AA is not learning how to stay sober and go to AA meetings, it is about learning how to live life on lifes terms outside of AA, the meetings are to hear the message and to pass it on to others seeking happy sobriety.

BTW congrats on day 2.... being grumpy is a part of early sobriety I found, day 3 & 4 were the worst for me in detox, the physical withdrawals really were at a peak for me then, every one is different, but most folks have thier worst withdrawals starting on day 3 so be prepared to call the doctor if need be, do not play hero, people die from alcohol withdrawals if they are bad.

keithj

Actually there is. It's called AA. Do the things suggested and you'll find that the grumpiness just sort of goes away automatically.

First couple of days without a drink is really strange. I don't think there are any absolutes in that time, but grumpiness seems to be pretty common. Taking positive action for your sobriety can be a big help. Try to keep in mind that all of things which seem like real problems, really aren't. If you're an active alcoholic, you have just one problem. When you find a solution for that, all of the other problems get taken care of. You'll know how to handle them.

1_day@_a_time

I'm grumpy all the time, everyday.

Unless I'm out of self & petitioning a Higher Power to relieve me from my thinking & my mind....