Hello! I'm new
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: SE Asia
Posts: 18
Hello! I'm new
Hi there, my name is ..... "padoink" and I have been struggling with alcoholism for perhaps 3 or 4 years now.
I live in South East Asia, but I am not from here originally. I am a Brit.
I first started my romance with alcohol around 3-4 years ago when I was in the rat race of career climbing in the big city in the UK. When I had a "bad day", I came home and drunk about 8 cans of 500ml beer.
Then, it seemed like I had more and more bad days.
My question moment to myself was ... "Am I drinking because i had a bad day, or am I having a bad day because of the drink?"
I managed to stop a few times and my weight went down every time - which is good as I am usually overweight. Then I would start drinking again. Slowly at first, but one beer leads to another, which leads to another, which leads .... ... then the fat comes back!
My latest bout of alcoholism has lasted around 1 year. I finally took the bull by the horns yesterday after lunch (with my lunch yesterday I had 2 bottles of 330ml beer).
Usually I would drink anywhere between 3-5 litres of beer per night. I have been known to drink at lunch time... heck, even breakfast. Any excuse. Alcohol has been making my life hell.
Last night instead of getting my usual 2 or 3 litre bottles of beer, I got some (frightfully expensive yikes) imported Non Alcoholic Champagne! I felt so proud of myself for not getting drunk!
With my alcoholism, I have felt sick most times. I didn't know if it was the extra 50lb or so I had gained on my already overweight body, or the alcohol or both. All I know is - it wasn't good.
Actually, the last time I gave up alcohol was in Jan 08. I was here in SE Asia for Christmas and new year, and I was heavily drinking because of the cheap beer and nightlife here. I went home to UK and continued to drink. Then I decided, let's just stop and see what happens (under the premises of a "30 day trial"). I stopped until April (until my next visit to here in S.E.A.).
But, back to the today ...
I had a tough time sleeping last night (although I felt sleepy since 7pm). I had HORRIBLE dreams ... then I kept waking up! I was moving around like crazy in bed, and I feel sorry for my poor longsuffering wife! Is that because of the beginnings of withdrawl, or is it just a conincidence?
And mentioning that makes me want to say one more thing before I go ...
It's because of my wife and the fact that this wonderful 22 year old woman deserves me to be healthy that I want to change. She pointed out my belly and how bad I looked yesterday. I had to agree. I looked yukky. I am 27 years old, and I feel like 100!
From now on - NO MORE! I've had it.
I read an incredibly powerful article yesterday by a University of Manchester academic (who's also a recovering alco) and he said something like "I don't know when I'll pick up my next drink, but I'm sure it's not going to be today".
I like that. Here's my take ... If I can get through today, then it's a success all by itself. If I can just control myself today, then it's a victory. If I can take it one day at a time, then I am winning.
So, that's all from me right now, thanks in advance for your welcomes (which I know will be great) ...
and I really am so happy that this online forum exists (there's no AA in the city where I live).
Thanks and God bless.
Padoink!
I live in South East Asia, but I am not from here originally. I am a Brit.
I first started my romance with alcohol around 3-4 years ago when I was in the rat race of career climbing in the big city in the UK. When I had a "bad day", I came home and drunk about 8 cans of 500ml beer.
Then, it seemed like I had more and more bad days.
My question moment to myself was ... "Am I drinking because i had a bad day, or am I having a bad day because of the drink?"
I managed to stop a few times and my weight went down every time - which is good as I am usually overweight. Then I would start drinking again. Slowly at first, but one beer leads to another, which leads to another, which leads .... ... then the fat comes back!
My latest bout of alcoholism has lasted around 1 year. I finally took the bull by the horns yesterday after lunch (with my lunch yesterday I had 2 bottles of 330ml beer).
Usually I would drink anywhere between 3-5 litres of beer per night. I have been known to drink at lunch time... heck, even breakfast. Any excuse. Alcohol has been making my life hell.
Last night instead of getting my usual 2 or 3 litre bottles of beer, I got some (frightfully expensive yikes) imported Non Alcoholic Champagne! I felt so proud of myself for not getting drunk!
With my alcoholism, I have felt sick most times. I didn't know if it was the extra 50lb or so I had gained on my already overweight body, or the alcohol or both. All I know is - it wasn't good.
Actually, the last time I gave up alcohol was in Jan 08. I was here in SE Asia for Christmas and new year, and I was heavily drinking because of the cheap beer and nightlife here. I went home to UK and continued to drink. Then I decided, let's just stop and see what happens (under the premises of a "30 day trial"). I stopped until April (until my next visit to here in S.E.A.).
But, back to the today ...
I had a tough time sleeping last night (although I felt sleepy since 7pm). I had HORRIBLE dreams ... then I kept waking up! I was moving around like crazy in bed, and I feel sorry for my poor longsuffering wife! Is that because of the beginnings of withdrawl, or is it just a conincidence?
And mentioning that makes me want to say one more thing before I go ...
It's because of my wife and the fact that this wonderful 22 year old woman deserves me to be healthy that I want to change. She pointed out my belly and how bad I looked yesterday. I had to agree. I looked yukky. I am 27 years old, and I feel like 100!
From now on - NO MORE! I've had it.
I read an incredibly powerful article yesterday by a University of Manchester academic (who's also a recovering alco) and he said something like "I don't know when I'll pick up my next drink, but I'm sure it's not going to be today".
I like that. Here's my take ... If I can get through today, then it's a success all by itself. If I can just control myself today, then it's a victory. If I can take it one day at a time, then I am winning.
So, that's all from me right now, thanks in advance for your welcomes (which I know will be great) ...
and I really am so happy that this online forum exists (there's no AA in the city where I live).Thanks and God bless.
Padoink!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 818
Welcome to the Home for the Mentally Bewildered. I wish you every success is getting sober. Try and find an AA meeting (you'll be suprised). I stop and think sometimes how much different my life would have been had I stopped drinking when I was your age. But I didn't, so it isn't.
Attitude of Gratitude
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
I'm glad you found us and thanks for sharing. You may be going through some withdrawls but rest assured after a few days things will ease up. As far as the insomnia, we're here 24/7, so hang around SR, keep posting, read lots of threads and just don't drink today. God Bless,
Judy
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
Padoink, I had the same thing - strange dreams and restlessness for a few nights, among other withdrawal symptoms. I kept seeing things during the day, and was very jumpy then, too. It will pass, along with all the other adjustments your body will have to make. You have some healing to do, be patient - and be happy that you've owned up to this problem now, while you can make everything ok before more damage is done. Please let us know how you're doing.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: SE Asia
Posts: 18
Thanks everyone!
I am so glad that I am not the only one to experience what I have been experiencing!
@joedris: Hi Joe, thanks for the welcome! The only problem is that where I live is a relatively remote island where there aren't any AA's. And, I don't know if I'm the kind of person for whom AA would work anyway. Dunno.
@CarolD : thanks for that. Actually, i noticed your tagline in another thread a few minutes before you posted on this one. Nifty! Yes! thanks, actually the person whom I mentioned before whose words I was inspired by is "Chris McCully". His exact words were " I don't know when I will pick up a drink again, but I do know it won't be today".
@MickHK: Yes, spot on with the "Sozzled Old Farts"! Where I live there are only a few foreigners, but you can be sure that if I look out my back garden now I'll see 2 of them sitting drinking a few bottles ... and, yep, I saw in HK before, when I visited! Yucks!
@serenity: thanks for your kind words, and your welcome mat
I am glad that I am not the only one to experience withdrawl like this!
@horselover: it feels great to be called a "family member" in this forum! wow, thanks
@Hevyn: Thanks for sharing your experiences, and I am glad that I am not alone in the weird dreams and insomnia thing. I felt really paranoid last night also, every little sound I was thinking that maybe someone's breaking into the house etc etc. I know it's irrational. My wife was great though. Thank you Thank you Hev, for the lovely encouragement!
Doink
I am so glad that I am not the only one to experience what I have been experiencing!
@joedris: Hi Joe, thanks for the welcome! The only problem is that where I live is a relatively remote island where there aren't any AA's. And, I don't know if I'm the kind of person for whom AA would work anyway. Dunno.
@CarolD : thanks for that. Actually, i noticed your tagline in another thread a few minutes before you posted on this one. Nifty! Yes! thanks, actually the person whom I mentioned before whose words I was inspired by is "Chris McCully". His exact words were " I don't know when I will pick up a drink again, but I do know it won't be today".
@MickHK: Yes, spot on with the "Sozzled Old Farts"! Where I live there are only a few foreigners, but you can be sure that if I look out my back garden now I'll see 2 of them sitting drinking a few bottles ... and, yep, I saw in HK before, when I visited! Yucks!
@serenity: thanks for your kind words, and your welcome mat
I am glad that I am not the only one to experience withdrawl like this!@horselover: it feels great to be called a "family member" in this forum! wow, thanks
@Hevyn: Thanks for sharing your experiences, and I am glad that I am not alone in the weird dreams and insomnia thing. I felt really paranoid last night also, every little sound I was thinking that maybe someone's breaking into the house etc etc. I know it's irrational. My wife was great though. Thank you Thank you Hev, for the lovely encouragement!
Doink
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: SE Asia
Posts: 18
Padoink/Doink!
thanks for that flutter!
it's a play on a family member's name which sounds like padoynk, and there is a famous (maybe infamous) wrestling character called "Doink the Clown", so I combined them!
I love the name too
Doink!
it's a play on a family member's name which sounds like padoynk, and there is a famous (maybe infamous) wrestling character called "Doink the Clown", so I combined them!
I love the name too
Doink!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 818
OK, if there aren't any AA meetings on your island, then are there other alcoholics? You could always start an AA group. And your doubts as to whether or not it would work for you are questionable if you've never tried it. In the meantime, however, SR is the next best thing. Glad you joined us.
Disposable Hero
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Being, ME
Posts: 3,758
Welcome to the SR community!!
A few links you may find useful;
Alcoholics Anonymous
AA Speaker Tapes
AA Speakers
AA Speakers
Keep coming back and remember Easy Does It!!
A few links you may find useful;
Alcoholics Anonymous
AA Speaker Tapes
AA Speakers
AA Speakers
Keep coming back and remember Easy Does It!!
Robert
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Temperanceville, VA
Posts: 5
Hey 'Doink, The restlessness and dreams will lessen with time. I suggest eating a balanced diet and go light on sugars of all kinds. The sugar mimics alcohol in your system I'm told and slows the physiological changes that you want to occur when you remove alcohol from your system. Good luck, be well and happy. A friend on the Eastern Shore of VA, USA
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: SE Asia
Posts: 18
Originally Posted by Seanachie 
Hey 'Doink, The restlessness and dreams will lessen with time. I suggest eating a balanced diet and go light on sugars of all kinds. The sugar mimics alcohol in your system I'm told and slows the physiological changes that you want to occur when you remove alcohol from your system. Good luck, be well and happy. A friend on the Eastern Shore of VA, USA
@everyone: thanks for your comments and nice words.
'Doink!
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Welcome to SR Doink, check out AA online since you do not have any meetings in your area, also check out other programs, most of the other programs do not have face to face support, some do in limited areas, so reach out where ever you can for support and direction.
Have faith that it is possible to get and stay sober with out F2F support whether it is AA or another program, heck there is nothing to stop one from using more then one program.
Have faith that it is possible to get and stay sober with out F2F support whether it is AA or another program, heck there is nothing to stop one from using more then one program.
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