yeahgr8

OK i know i know i've been out there bigtime, i am concentrating on the keyboard! I am soooo scared that i gambled my last money away , but i have realised that it is only 30 mins since i blacked out! Please God let this be true, tell me i haven't found a way to waste my last 5k online...i just can't remember! I found an unopenened pack of cigs, wait there is one on the floor sweet! It's 23.57 in spain and ihave just woekn up...what a great disease/problem!

**** it still glad to be here, ok waking up now, bit more wine left! 10 more days left!

I tmeans a lot to be able to post here!

Have to edit this i rememeber now being out at a bar and betting about something!

I cant remember a ******* thing!

Thinking about it, thank the lord (or whatever for the secular guys/girls) i can't have been to the casino cos it is 30 mins away and i've only blacked out for 50 mins!

Carol thank God for you!

CarolD

Try to stay as safe as possible
You are gambling with more than money.

Please call your AA friend or find a meeting.

yeahgr8

OK i have 'woken up' now and there is no way that i have done my money like i normally would! Online would mean i would have to transfer euros to pounds which would take a day, and i haven't had time to go to the casino! Thank God my credit cards are maxed, and i have a limit on my debit card...i have 11k euros and a porche worth 25k left....thats it! Oh and my life too:-)

flutter

I hope you find your way back.

With all due respect, thank you for such a tragic reminder of why I am happy to be sober.

CarolD

I hope you have paid for your treatment stay
that might be wise.....just in case.

Shower...food...a walk....AA
all positive actions

yeahgr8

They have the money all paid, all i have to do do is turn up! First edition stuff C, **** i need a miracle!

sailorjohn

You have to willing to let the miracle happen. Good luck.

Mattcake

Cliff... I thought long before deciding to answer this thread, as I hate to come across as being preachy. I hope you won't be offended, I'm just concerned for your wellbeing.

So you go into rehab in 10 days. What's going to happen until then? The notion of a "last hurrah" seems very scary and dangerous. On the other hand, your recovery could start right now, if you so wanted.

Just... take good care of yourself

yeahgr8

ok i am certain that the 'food' that i have here comprising of 'chicken' (fried of course, spanis style which is revolting) and chips was from my last port of call....thank god for that, and not from further a field! i need a miracle...taken me 15 mins to finish this...i wish...ah whatever you know the rest ...

yeahgr8

Thanks for your replies, how ridiculous has this gotten?!

Nothing more to say really...time for action!

Tazman53

Take it my freind, don't just talk it! Pick up the phone, there is nothing stopping you from going to an AA meeting or calling the AA hotline there. As some one already said, you can begin recovery now.

Dee74

I'm with Matt, mate - I know very well the allure of a last hurrah, but this is a bit indulgent, mate - as well as being very dangerous.

Walking into rehab drinking the dregs of your last bottle might be very Hollywood, but you want to get there in one piece....

As you say - time for action.
Start day one anytime you like, Cliff
D

yeahgr8

I am done! My recovery begins today...