One week!
A new dawn and new chapter
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
One week!
Man am I glad to say that! Today is 1 week sober again, I'm on the way to re-building myself back up to where I was before that unfortunate, but necessary slip up. One thing I am surprised by all this was having to go through mini detox. Two even one year ago just one night heavy drinking followed up by a few days off I would of been fine. But I had the signs of detox going on for the first few days. Skin crawling bad anxiety, bouts of bad depression, rapid heart beat, mild body tremors, crazy thoughts popping into my head you know it was bad. But it was pretty mild to my original quit date back in December when I was binging for a few months straight, quit drinking, and then followed up by being the sickest I've ever gotten in my life.
I thought I learned my lesson then, but as stated this relapse was a necessary evil I feel that had to happen. It proved to me that with a lot of sober time and overall feeling better then what I was that you can still never go back and be cured from drinking and it will be as fun and as harmless as it was when I first started drinking 17 years ago. So I made my mistake, lived and learn from it and moving in my life
I just want to thank everyone who has been supportive. I sometimes feel bad that I don't post enough on here. I see some posters who have the 10,000,000,000,000,000 posts to their names and are in every thread helping out newcomers and veterans alike. That's one thing I plan to work more on eventually but I guess one thing at a time. But once again thanks everybody, your support does mean alot to me!
I thought I learned my lesson then, but as stated this relapse was a necessary evil I feel that had to happen. It proved to me that with a lot of sober time and overall feeling better then what I was that you can still never go back and be cured from drinking and it will be as fun and as harmless as it was when I first started drinking 17 years ago. So I made my mistake, lived and learn from it and moving in my life
I just want to thank everyone who has been supportive. I sometimes feel bad that I don't post enough on here. I see some posters who have the 10,000,000,000,000,000 posts to their names and are in every thread helping out newcomers and veterans alike. That's one thing I plan to work more on eventually but I guess one thing at a time. But once again thanks everybody, your support does mean alot to me!
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 42
Congratulations on a week!
As a newbie, I've appreciated your posts recently, because I'm still entertaining the idea that I'll be able to drink the way I did in the beginning - not the way I did in the end. It really helps to hear over and over that you just go back to where you were when you try that. So thank you.
Jayne
As a newbie, I've appreciated your posts recently, because I'm still entertaining the idea that I'll be able to drink the way I did in the beginning - not the way I did in the end. It really helps to hear over and over that you just go back to where you were when you try that. So thank you.
Jayne
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Knock on wood, but I pray I never have to detox again, even though mine was medically done, the stuff that went on in my head was pretty whacked. I only have really detoxed once and that was after a 5 year drunk. No I was not fall down drunk the whole time, but I never drew a sober breath through out the whole time.
Resident
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 4,150
Way to go Bard.
You definitely sound more determined than ever and you have always been determined.
Posting here really helps me stay focussed and hopefully something I say will help someone that is reading it also.
I have times when I want to try to relive the fun times too and it is shares like yours that convince me that I am only fooling myself.
Thanks for the reminder.
You definitely sound more determined than ever and you have always been determined.
Posting here really helps me stay focussed and hopefully something I say will help someone that is reading it also.
I have times when I want to try to relive the fun times too and it is shares like yours that convince me that I am only fooling myself.
Thanks for the reminder.
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Littleton, Co.
Posts: 3,317
Bard - This thread will be an eye opener for many; over time our minds do start saying " well... maybe I could have just one".
After 7 sober years my mind convinced me that I could drink again, like a normal person. Within a few weeks my body needed it daily.....
Thanks for the helpful post and congratulations on 1 week.
After 7 sober years my mind convinced me that I could drink again, like a normal person. Within a few weeks my body needed it daily.....
Thanks for the helpful post and congratulations on 1 week.
A new dawn and new chapter
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
Don't let your self be fooled about that "it would be fun like old times" voice in your head, let me and some other people who went out and came back beaten up that it is indeed, not a fun time. That whole fun scene is just a illusion anyway. If it was so much fun then why do so many of us wish we could stop having all that fun?
And Tazz knock on wood here for myself I hope that was my last mini detox and the one in December was my last big one! That one was the worse. Besides having the DT's and seeing snakes and spiders I had about every detox sign. I was really freaked out that I was cracking up when I heard whispering in my house and then all the random crazy insane thoughts going on in my head, I thought I was a gonner for sure and would have to be locked up in a padded cell for the rest of my life!
And Tazz knock on wood here for myself I hope that was my last mini detox and the one in December was my last big one! That one was the worse. Besides having the DT's and seeing snakes and spiders I had about every detox sign. I was really freaked out that I was cracking up when I heard whispering in my house and then all the random crazy insane thoughts going on in my head, I thought I was a gonner for sure and would have to be locked up in a padded cell for the rest of my life!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Bard, keep on trucking my friend, and hang in there.
The slip may have done you some good if you fell backwards and smacked your head on the pavement, thus knocking some sense into ya. I've done that too, d*mn it hurts, lol.
The slip may have done you some good if you fell backwards and smacked your head on the pavement, thus knocking some sense into ya. I've done that too, d*mn it hurts, lol.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Dayton, OH.
Posts: 879
Good job on the one week Bard! You are doing super awesome! And don't worry about how many posts you have or don't have! LOL. Like you said, one thing at a time. I know I try to skim a few threads here and there, but mostly to see what information, support, help, etc., I can get from them. If I happen to be able to congratulate someone on their clean time or help someone out along the way, all the better, but I really think our first few months in recovery should be more focused on ourselves. Which is really hard for me to do. I am a people pleaser though and through. I love making people happy... And that makes it difficult to find the balance and focus on myself so I can stay clean and become the people pleaser I once was, with a few new 'tricks' up my sleeve so to speak. LOLOL.
Anyway, keep up the great work. TELL on your addiction. I cannot stress how important that is. It may tell you it will seem stupid to tell on the slightest little thing it's trying to convince you to do, but tell anyway. No one will make fun of you for it. In fact, you may help someone else out along the way! *HUGS*
Anyway, keep up the great work. TELL on your addiction. I cannot stress how important that is. It may tell you it will seem stupid to tell on the slightest little thing it's trying to convince you to do, but tell anyway. No one will make fun of you for it. In fact, you may help someone else out along the way! *HUGS*
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