sunshinebaby

I got through today but I was thinking about stopping by my shop and grabbing some wine on the way home from picking the kids up from school. We drive right by there, so I went another way home. I hate that I have to have this argument in my head, should I or shouldn't I. But I do.

It was like this:-

I should drink because: hubby is on nightshift and I can stay up as late as I want. And my fav shows are on and I usually drink and relax.

I should drink because I really feel like a glass of wine tonight, it would be relaxing.

I shouldn't drink because I want to fit into these jeans I saw in the shop

I shouldn't drink because I want to be healthy, inside and out

I shouldn't drink because I want to get fit and start my exercising and each time I drink I move back and not forward.

I shouldn't drink because I would really like to start my 6am walking and theres no way I will do that if I have a hangover.

I shouldn't drink because I don't want my kids to see

I shouldn't drink because its costing me too much money

I shouldn't drink because I can't stop at one

I shouldn't drink because when I do I feel weak and depressed and I want to feel strong.

So the shoulds got beaten by the shouldn'ts so I am drinking a protein shake instead. And I feel so happy I drove past that shop. Its today, I will have this argument again tommorrow, but I feel good about it today.

adore79

Great work! Maybe print out that list and keep it for tommorrow. You did it one day you can do it another ODAAT. Congrats

Maggot4Life

Great job, its always an awesome feeling when you make it through the day sober. I also make lists similar to yours and it really helps when the cravings strike.

Tazman53

I used to keep a "Gratitude" list in my hip pocket, it was a list of all of the things good I had due to not drinking, I would read it over and aks my self after every item "Is a drink worth losing this?" The list did not include material things, it was things like:

The respect of my family.
The respect of friends.
My pride.
A clear head.
Telling no lies.
Looking at myself in the mirror and liking who I see.
Driving with out canstantly scanning my mirrors for cops.
Not worrying if some one smells booze on my breath.
Not being alone anymore.
Not fearing life.
Not being paranoid.
Not being angry.
Not being frustrated.
Not hating myself.
etc.
etc.

A list of what I have to lose by simply taking that first drink.

Early sobriety is a bear, staying sober takes work, but it is well worth it and it becomes easier with time, the hardest part is to stay sober once life is starting to get good and that voice starts telling me that "It wasn't that bad, I bet I can handle it now!", but if I am doing what I need to be doing, it is not that hard with time and the steps. Things really started to go a lot better once I was working on cleaning up the wreckage from my past, with the guilt and shame being dealt with, the idea or need for a drink is off in the distance, sanity has returned and the insanity of a drink is gone.

vegibean

Congrats on getting through the day. That is awesome!!! It gets better however you'll still have those talks with yourself. You'll be amazed at how strong you really are.

Fubarcdn

Congratulations on making it through.
When I first quit drinking I learned about the list from Smart Recovery and when I did mine it looked similar to yours.
A few reasons to drink and a lot of reasons not to.
I read it once a week just to remind myself as my addictive voice daoesn't come out much anymore.
After I made my list I decided that I will never drink again.
Keep up the good work.

Coolmummy

Absolutley brilliant. 2 shoulds and 8 shouldn'ts. Seems a fairly straight forward argument to me! Keep it up..


xxx

Toomutch

Your list is awesome! My hope is that you will keep adding to the shouldn'ts... Good work sunshinebaby!!!

sunshinebaby

Thanks everyone, today is Saturday, we have the most perfect sunny afternoon, and I have a great movie to watch tonight. And I have no alcohol (instead some nice blueberry strudel!!) and I am on day 5, so life is sweet!! Best wishes to you all.

Coolmummy

Yes !!!!


cm xxxx

acer67

Awesome Sunshine!

I need to do one of those up too! I know that as time goes on it will get easier and easier.