dingus3

greetings. this is day 10 without booze. I was ok this weekend, a little difficult finding something to do, but i did not drink. I had class last night till 10pm, and class this morning at 530am. Im looking for that excuse to stop trying and go out and drink beer. i know that one become 8, then ill run out of money and go to the atm, get cigarettes, go back to the bar and drink until they will not serve me anymore just like i always did. Ill spend upwards of $80 that i dont have, ill make funny jokes, have tons of fun and be the life of the party, ill begin to drink liquor after beer and will walk out of the bar at 230am with a sixpack under my arm to drive home. I can not go to a bar and have one beer... it is futile to even attempt. I CAN NOT predict that i will get home, not crash my car, or worse. Im reminded of the moment 10 days ago when i disgusted and scared myself to come here to spill and otherwise get help to stop drinking and break my cycle of binge, abstain, binge, abstain... I can't get drunk enough, ill chase it till the sun comes up and i force myself to sleep. Im posting here to express my apprehension with staying sober tonight, my urge to, and my fear thereof in the hope that someone else knows that they are not alone. Im right on the front line now and im saying, no. Im not going to wake up hungover tomorrow afternoon, im not gonna take any drunken chances tonight with my life or my future and Im gonna stay straight and watch a bootleg movie on the internet prior to a decent night's sleep. best wishes to all, good night.

yeahgr8

Great post, wishing you a peaceful night!

Fubarcdn

Good post and good job on finding and remembering all the reasons why you don't want to drink.
as long as you can remember those things will be fine.

Anna

Good post, Dingus!

Remind yourself of where you will end up, and you're motivated to stay sober tonight.

least

If you stay sober you can't drive drunk and kill yourself or someone else - that's a good thing! Keeping even one drunk off the road is a great reason to stay sober!

katie89

This is the great thing about us we all know Exactly what you are feeling when it comes to the drinking.I went for three days once and thought well there you go I don't have a problem..I would hear commercials for booze at 6 am and think hhmm everyone else is doing it too why else would they have that commercial on this early.Always come back here and never be ashamed.It is the hardest thing to do quitting it.But there are ways and maybe one day you will read something and it will turn your life around.Welcome Glad to meet you"Dingus 3"