hiding

Have you ever noticed how many dysfunctional family relationships there are on tv? Does this help to stop dysfunctional families in real life from addressing their problems by promoting the idea that dysfunctional is 'normal' and that there isn't an alternative?

It's hard enough for me to picture what the alternative might be and I just wonder whether outside influences like tv help to reinforce the trap that families like mine are in.

GiveLove

I find myself more intolerant of television, and its portrayal of "normal," with every passing year.

I don't give a lot of time to "why" they broadcast so many dysfunctional families (I mean it's obvious: they make more money telling these interesting screwed-up stories than they would just showing calm, normal families, right? LOL) The fact is that they do, and it irritates me on very deep levels.

I have a lot of trouble watching TV at all, if you must know. I don't want to run the risk that I'll start to think something is normal when it clearly isn't (husbands and wives who lie to each other and laugh about it, standup comics who b*tch nonstop about their spouse, etc....)

I go to bed with a knot in my stomach.

Enough of that!

dothi

I have to agree with GiveLove - it perpetuates false ideas of "normal". There are few good shows out there that I consider entertainment.

That said, I like to think it more reflects that unhealthy relationships abound in society, and everyone is struggling at their own pace. Some arenas are getting healthier, others are floundering backwards. It suggests more than ever how important it is to model healthy behavior not only for your family, but your coworkers/colleagues as well. We all need reminders and reassurrances as to what healthy looks like from time to time in our lives.

DesertEyes

I gave up on TV some years ago, and now I don't even own one. So I agree with everybody, I don't like it.

Mike

guiab

I haven't owned a tv in years and last I looked there were a lot of 'reality' shows that have a scary resemblance to soap operas of years past (same weird lighting). But I get enough exposure at school to gossip on the current offerings (to a malevolent unkindly god) to know there aint' much there. We as a viewing public are just fascinated with dysfunction and destruction, especially in celebrities.
Yet, if we see lots of abnormal lives on TV, maybe it would reduce the amount of shame that an ACOA feels, and make it easier to talk about one's problems? It is just my observation, but it seems like many, especially those under 35, are far more willing to mention drug/alcohol abuse in their families, and themselves, than in years past.
Such a public service, if you can call it that, could certainly be addressed with weekly showings of Hamlet and King Lear (dysfunction has always been fun to watch), but don't hold your breath.

hiding

Interesting replies. I do watch tv but I tend to avoid programmes which focus on dysfunctional families and go for happy family shows instead or shows which show close relationships between friends. I find I feel deeply uncomfortable when fictional programmes are similar to my circumstances and get annoyed by the kind of reality shows which turn serious problems into entertainment and, by focussing on people who've totally lost control of all areas of their lives, enable af to distinguish himself from others and continue to believe that he's 'better' than them.

I read a lot too and have noticed in the past year or so that I tend to prefer books where the heroes are proper heroes. Again, I feel slightly uncomfortable with flawed characters. I suppose I want escapism and proof of an ideal. Some might say that's not a particularly good sign!

A few times I've watched something (9 times out of 10, drama) for no better reason than because it's the next big thing and had to switch off before the end of the first episode because I just don't want to see it.

This is the balance I'm wondering about. I agree that some shows can help people to feel they're not alone provided they're properly approached. There are some well made documentaries out there on a range of issues. At the same time though, the constant diet of dysfunctional families can provide a strange sort of 'proof' that there's nothing wrong with being dysfunctional.

You're so right. By comparison to Greek tragedies, we don't have a clue how to 'do' dysfunction on tv. Of course, the Greeks believed that it would be a cathartic experience. Maybe that's the part we've lost. There definitely seems to be an element of cheap thrill in the tabloid progs and mags that are around now.