cdk1972

Take a "moral and fearless" inventory of yourself? Thanks.

cmc

Hi,
Al-Anon has workbook that alot of people like to use, but the guidelines for this step can be found in the book: Paths to Recovery (this is also Al-Anon approved literature). It's suggested to do this stepwork with the guidance of a sponsor.

ItsmeAlice

Ooooh, good question.

Aside from digging deep for the intestinal fortitude....not an easy one for me...I like to make lists and write down random thoughts about own behavior and emotions as they come to me. I add to it over time as insights bubble to the surface.

Later when I read back over my lists and other journal entries, I see patterns forming and similarities to the stories of others here on the forum and it helps me to see myself more clearly.

I don't know if that answers your question, but it is what came to ming when I read it.

Hope this helps!

Alice

laurie6781

One thing that many people forget in taking that inventory (step 4) is that you really should include the GOOD points of one's self also. That is one thing your sponsor will remind you of over and over, lol

When you are ready, you will find it is not near as hard as we 'project' it to be and is quite a beneficial exercise into one's self.

J M H O

Love and hugs,

GiveLove

CDK, are you close to Al-Anon meetings anywhere? I found it much easier to get through the steps when I had some flesh-and-blood support....it made SO much more sense.

Taking5

The words are "searching and fearless moral inventory". It tells you exactly how to do this in the big book of alcoholics anonymous. Since you are posting in the F&F section, I don't know if you are asking for yourself in terms of working an Alanon program or for your friend or family member? Can you elaborate?

The purpose of an inventory is to catalog what is wrong or undesirable about you as a person, and hopefully remove these character defects as we continue to work the steps. The "good" parts of your inventory is not mentioned anywhere in the big book, for what that is worth. If it helps you to finish the no-so-good parts of your inventory then I would do it.

There are several good books and worksheets on this subject, and a sponsor would be a great idea too.

Good luck.

Freedom1990

If you're referring to step 4, there are 12 steps total, meant to be worked in order for a reason. I also found it was best to work those steps with a sponsor who had already worked through them. If I plan a vacation with a tour of a certain place, I'd want a tour guide familiar with the territory. Same applies for me with the 12 steps.

cagefree

For me - my step 4 was filled with crimes I committed against myself - I allowed people with unacceptable behaviours into my life and made situations that were not okay acceptable.

In the throes of my codependency, it was extremely easy for me to trash myself...and I originally thought that's what step 4 was...however, it wasn't about not taking out the trash every week or forgetting to pay a bill on time or not being the perfect member of society.

I think being truly honest with myself and looking at how I let myself get to where I was was key - not ripping myself to pieces. Once I saw how I contributed to my situation, I then was able to see how I could prevent it from happening again and the power I really posess. I don't have to be a victim. It helped a lot with my anger towards XABF. He was just behaving like an addict does - but I expected more than that and wanted him to change to meet my expectations - trying to change others so they meet my expectations - yup - that's on my list.

I would highly reccomend doing step 4 with a sponsor or therapist.