Coolmummy

I just don't know what it is - 2 days away from 60 days, three weeks and four days off the cigarettes , nothing really too bad in my life, ok, massive financial and job issues but that's not new...I just feel so so depressed.

There is someone in my life who used to be my best friend but she let me down from a huge height around thid time last year and I still can't forgive her. I actually want to go to her house and kill her right now, and that's kind of taking my mind over. Bad way to feel, negative, and stupid, but..
About an hour ago I said to my husband I just WANT a drink and a cigarette. Grr. Why do I want them? I don't NEED tham that's for sure. Sigh...Sorry just needed to write it down.

sorry again

cm

Toomutch

I know why your down... You listed several reasons to bring a person down. I'm sorry that you are letting the anger toward you friend remain as a primary focus. Can you talk to this friend and voice your feelings. It is important to let go of anger and resentments or they will fester. Easier said than done, I know.

123bubblegum123

hey cool,

please know that what you're going through is something (probably) everyone on this site goes through. it's always the "blah" days that seem to drive me nuts - the really awful ones where i actually know what's wrong are even worse than just being in a funk. my best advice: do something productive that will get you feeling better about yourself. i find when i'm in a funk i just have NO energy and can't even make it to eat something. then, when night comes, plan something that you will almost positively enjoy (a favorite movie, get your fave take-out chinese, whatever) and if none of that works: take a nap!

also, feel free to message me if you need to vent. the chat on this site can be super helpful too, as there are almost always people around to discuss random debacles with.

hope that helps and feel better hun!

Rachel

jamdls

Instead of feeling down remind yourself of what you have accomplished! You've kicked 2 addictions!!!! You should be jumping for joy, remind yourself of what that ex "friend" is missing by you not being in their life. Success is the best revenge.

J

least

Hope you feel better soon.:ghug3

Impurrfect

((Coolmummy))

It's also pretty common to have these feelings any time we have an "anniversary" come up...30 days, 60 days, a year...whatever. I heard about this when I was new to recovery, and just kept it in the back of my mind, any time I had one of those dates come up. Sure enough, sometimes I'd just feel "funky" around an anniversary time. Once it passed, I'd get back to normal.

You're doing really great, though! I'm about to quit smoking, so you're way ahead of me on that count. Be gentle with yourself, know that this will pass, and give yourself a few pats on the back for all that you've accomplished.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

Coolmummy

yet again, the love and support on this site has overwhelmed me. I didn't expect any replies but you are just all so lovely :ghug Regards the ex friend, I've got over that now - sometimes I just want to kill her as she really did hurt me very badly, however, I know she's worth nothing and I need to get on with it without her, so that's out the way!

It's so hard financially at the moment, my poor oh is so stressed about it and I am finding it extremely difficult to get a job, whcih is making me feel guilty which then turns to despondancy..I guess I just have to think and remind him that I am here for the children which is equally important huh?


Anniversary - yes i hadn't thoght of that - I've been really counting the days down to 60 lately as I have never ever been this long without a drink! Maybe it is that making me feel 'odd'? Still, I do have those 'sparkly eyes' my little girl was sooo impressed with !!

Anyway, thank you so much again - I promise to be a better member


cm xx