Hammerhead

I recently stumbled across this book that was written a few years ago. There are only two chapters available to view online... but I really learned a lot and wanted to share.

"When Someone You Love is Addicted to Alcohol or Drugs" - Chapter 8: 'How You Can Help Facilitate Recovery'

bluebelle

Chapter 8: "This means that when alcoholics or addicts embark on recovery, even though they are no longer drinking or using, they have a natural, underlying tendency to feel they should not have to cope with the reality. They have a tendency to think they should not have to put up with things that don't suit them, because, for so long this has actually been true for them in their minds."


That paragraph really fits my ABF's situation now that he has been clean for 3 months. I get really tired of him complaining about ridiculous stuff that we all have to deal with on a regular basis.

winnie12

Thank you for posting this. i have a big family counseling session tomorrow with AS and this is very helpful right now. I like the idea of taking a "matter of fact" attitude - i do notice he's more receptive when i express my ideas without emotion, blame, guilt, etc.

Hammerhead

I know! I know! This hit me on square on the forehead. I'm learning that our emotions are a product of expectations... unfulfilled expectations which in codie translation is CONTROL! So many good things in this chapter

NeedingHelp7

Thankyou, this is very helpful info for me. I wish I had known/learned it years ago, but oh well, better late than never.