Katie09

This is my new mantra. Half of me thinks I need to step away from SR completely after the thread in the newcomers' forum, but the truth is I need the support of this fora. At any rate, had an asthma attack after a thread in that fora. I so don't need that. This is what happens when I "stuff stuff" down and cannot freely speak my mind. I've always been so durn independent and don't back down, although at the same time I realize one has to be prudent - but that is really more applicable to business than anything else.

There is another SMART meeting tonight which is on my agenda. I am just spent and tired of "talking" with those of a different bent. If nothing else, I so realize how "that program" is so not right for me. Thank Doorknob () that I do have other options here. Anyway, just needed to vent before I lose my mind!!!....................

doorknob

You're just terminally unique... get over yourself.

Katie09

Katie breathes a sigh of relief. Whew!!!! That felt really good. LOL and thank you sooooooooooo much.

And, BTW, notice how I steered FAR CLEAR of that thread? I would have had a stroke otherwise.

stone

Lol!

lunarise

Katie~ Welcome to the unique forum where everyone is the same...er I mean not the same..I mean we all think the same oh wait no we dont ..what was I saying?

WELCOME!
:ghug3

Zencat

Can I play? I'm terminally unique in a most disturbing way

parentrecovers

is this thread about me?

hang in there, folks! and keep reaching out!

hugs, k

Katie09

Oh, I've been here for a while. I only ventured over there to be supportive, but it ended up to the detriment of ME. That is ok. I do stand up for what I believe. I just have to be more careful, or selective, or whatever.

Fubarcdn

That reminds me of the song from that Rudolph the Red nosed Reindeer movie.
We're a couple of misfits
What's the matter with misfits.
Just a couple of misfits.
Sec is where we fit in.

Katie09

Well, there aren't many of us, but I figure we have to stick together. It's very tough out there in the real world where AA dominates the planet. I do hope someday this is not the case. Nonetheless, I know I won't see it in my lifetime. Hopefully, "you youngsters" will see it in your lifetime.

doorknob

That sounds just like Shady (the junk dog).

Zencat

You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist."
-Friedrich Nietzsche

I think is good for me to be leery of those that have the correct way. "Viva la difference!".

Zencat

So true. :ghug3

Katie09

I echo this. To each his/her own. Nonetheless, I am fully aware that options are limited for people like me or us. I won't speak for y'all. I just know that my greatest frustration in life has been the dearth of treatment options, or groups, for people who are of this "bent."

The guy I went to see yesterday at Scottsdale Treatment Institute was very cool. He said I can believe whatever I want to believe. He has 30 years of sobriety in AA which is great. My only reserve is that he may try to push me into that model, which would NOT be appreciated. Nonetheless, seems like a good guy and I believe him. Still, after the last "joint" I remain wary. It's to be expected after losing $5K over misrepresentation, right?

Zencat

Well I hope you can get treatment that is meaning full to you. I think that the whole point of my treatment plan: develop a meaningful treatment plan/practice and avoid all the meaningless stuff. Fortunately there is CBT/REBT and some IDDT groups at the clinic I go to that practice addiction treatment in a meaningful way for me. I did a lot of meaningless things in my active addiction...so why work a program that has no meaning to me. I'm through with wasting my time.

Katie09

What is IDDT? I've never heard of that.

Zencat

The behavioral clinic I go to for f2f groups have 2 meetings 2hr each once a weeK, one for addiction and one for PTSD...There called: Intensive Duel Diagnosis Treatment (IDDT)

Bamboozle

Sorry, Katie.

Katie09

Ah, very interesting. I, too, am dual diagnosis. It is something fairly new, but thank Doorknob

I need to find a place like that which serves both the addiction and psychiatric disorder. I went to see my shrink this a.m. The guy at STI said to stick with him, as they know each other and the guy at STI says he's a good shrink (easier to spell out than psychiatrist). They actually worked together. So, I figure I am going to take the conservative approach, which all shrinks do anyway. Not to digress too much, but my shrink gave me Campral and bumped me up to 400 mg of Lamictal. Should be a winning combo, I figure. I remember when I was on 400 mg of Lamictal I had a bottle of wine in my refrigerator and forgot about it for a month. No kidding!! Such is the power of psychopharmacology, which is what I think of when I think of the second step; psychopharmacology is my HP. At any rate, with SMART meetings and me being careful about where I venture into SR, I think it just might work.

Katie09

Aww, please don't be sorry. I made the choice to go in there. It's on me.