Chrysalis123

I thought I would ask you all for some ideas. About 8 months ago my daughter was involved in a dangerous incident involving horses, livestock and 4H, brought about by a careless mother and her son. My child, this mom and/or her son could have been severely injured, but thank goodness they were safe. This mom left the scene of the accident, did not check on my child or her terrified horse and drove off. I called her later that evening wanting to know why she did not call me or my kid's dad so we could help our kid, and why she did not check on the well being of my 13 year old. This angered this lady and all hell broke loose with her attacking my daughter's character as well as 2 other kids who witnessed the accident. She called us all liars and threatened me with a lawsuit:wtf2. We were under attack from this lunatic for 8 months until the people in charge understood her accusations were false and put a stop to her antics. The whole ordeal greatly wounded my 12 year old, and this is the condensed version.

Anyway, I just found out last night that this lady and her kid will be participating in 4H again and we will have close contact for about 4 months. I have not seen her since the accident(all this went through mediators) and she never apologized for any of her actions or made amends. Because of my own issues from ACOA I feel I did a great job handling this all with dignity while protecting myself and my kid (without running away or becoming overcome with anxiety), but I am at a loss for what to say to this woman (who nearly killed my child and then staged a giant smear campaign against my kid and me which involved many other kids and parents from our small town) when I come face to face with her.

Any an all comments or advice welcome! How would you handle this?

peaceteach

I would hold my head up high and let my daughter know that she did nothing wrong, that she has absolutely EVERY right to participate in 4-H and have as much fun and enjoyment as she possibly can, and be a good example for her to follow in that "fun" department. Be civil to the other mom/daughter combo, but don't try and be buddy-buddy. Keep your distance and a hand up to this woman, i.e. don't trust her and don't give her anything, no ammo, nothing, just a smile and no sharing or conversation. You can be around her without having to be "with" her, you know. Don't participate in any smear stuff on your end. Give your daughter a good role model--make that your mission. I hope you both have a great spring/summer with 4-H! Good luck.