petiot

For starters, a person asking probably indicates they think they might be...which I do think at times, but I wonder if it's alcoholism or alcohol dependence, which I believe are different?

What I'd like to know, if people would share their stories, is what did you do that made you think you were an alcoholic? How often did/do you drink, how many years, why did/do you drink, etc...

Since I'm the one asking, I'll go first.

When did I start drinking?
I didn't drink much until my mid 20s. Started with drinking on weekends and just a way that me and my wife enjoyed our evenings. From what I remember is that as long as I've drank, I always drink until I more or less get so buzzed I go to sleep or pass out..there is not just a few drinks with me...it's always too much.

Why do/did I drink?
At first drinking was more socially driven. I would drink because I was out at a club/bar, etc. Me and my wife would drink on weekends if we were hanging out at home (which we still do) and is something I want to stop.

Why do/did I think it was a problem?
When drinking, I always drink too much, I can't have just a few...like that song goes, "IF I have one I'll have thirteen, there ain't no in between", that's exactly how I drink, and have always drank. I started to think it was a problem when I'd tell myself that I would not drink and sure enough, I'd drink, and I've repeated that countless times.

Some of the stories about me that people find humorous and get told often are things I did when I was drunk, which is something I dislike.

Since me and my wife will keep alcohol at the house to have on the weekend, I will buy extra to drink so she doesn't know I'm drinking as much as I do, which I keep hidden from her.

I have done things while drunk that I would normally never do...things that could ruin so much for me

I crave the buzz at night, almost every night of the week, for the past couple years.

I have an extremely hard time getting to sleep now if I don't drink at night.

That is why I think it's a big problem for me and why I found my way to soberrecovery.com

Is it alcoholism or dependence? I don't know..but I think it's a problem either way.

What is your story?

Iriss

Is it alcoholism or dependence? I don't know..but I think it's a problem either way.

Hi and welcome to SR, you will find lots of help and support... As you said above, it doesnt matter which it is, its a problem... Hope you find some support. take care x

least

I wouldn't bother to argue semantics too much here. Whether it's dependence or addiction, what's the difference? Addiction IS the body's dependence on a substance. I'd just have an honest talk with a medical professional about wanting to get sober, as medical supervision is a good idea for a safe detox. Then perhaps give AA a good try. Go to several meetings and see how you like them, some or all. It helps to have a face to face support group sometimes. There are other recovery programs out there too.

Coming here helps me a lot. I was a wino. I drank wine all day, every day. I had to drink first thing upon awakening to quell the shakes. I drank anywhere from one to three bottles of wine every day. I felt like sh!t all the time, physically as well as emotionally. I hated myself so much I really wished I were dead. Then I got over six months sober and relapsed. I beat myself up pretty badly over that, but now I'm moving forward again and know I can do this thing.

You can too. Just take it one day at a time. Don't drink for today. Just don't drink today. And when tomorrow becomes today, don't drink for today.

Welcome to the family!:ghug3

tellus

Like Least said: quibbling over semantics will just hold you back. Everyone has their own definition of what a "real alcoholic" is - I'm sure that by some people's definitions, I don't qualify. But I do know that my life is so much better sober than it was drunk. For me, that's all that matters. If you think you might have a problem, why not talk to your doctor and give sobriety a try? Nothing's lost in the trying.

Welcome to SR!

ETA: To answer your questions, I suppose I'm a bit of an atypical case. I started drinking when I was 19, was a daily drunk by 21, and got sober at 22. Part of that is my gender: women tend to go downhill faster than men. I was a solitary beer drinker, amounts aren't really relevant but I was no lightweight. I still don't really know why I drank. At first for the social aspect, I suppose, then because I liked the taste, then because I wanted to numb my mind, and finally because I had to. I knew it was a problem almost immediately (I've always had an addictive personality), but it took me a couple years to stop. When I'd had enough, I went to detox and rehab, and I've been sober since.

yeahgr8

You could go to an alcohol counselor and find out for sure?!

petiot

thank you all for replying

CarolD

Welcome back....

Please go to our Alcoholism Forum
Then you may have your answer.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

I know you are concerned about your health
and certainly drinking causes much damage
to non alcoholics as well as to alcoholics.

SHawk25

Where is a good place to find one?

Music man

great info!!

Fubarcdn

Welcome to SR.
My pattern is pretty similar to yours except I started younger(13) but I have never hidden it from my wife.
She has hidden alcohol from me on occasion and when I came home from a night at the bar I didn't mind a little game of hide and seek.
I asked the same are you question and even read Under The Influence and parts of the BB (Big Book) and still don't know but it doesn't matter. I know I have a drinking problem and the only way I can solve it is to quit.
I can't have just one or two. That hasn't worked ever but it has taken me 40 years to admit it.
Good luck and I hope this helps you see what you have to do.

Music man

I hear only you can diagnose yourself as being an alcoholic. I have diagnosed myself as an alcoholic, and I see a lot of the things you are saying as being very similar to me.

bstt03

Sounds to me like whether you call is "dependence" or "alcoholism", you already realize its a problem for you. So whatever you call it is a moot point. Do you have a plan to stop? What is your next step going to be?

sailorjohn

welcome!!!

My story is that I'm a recovering alcoholic.

Michigan Alcohol Screening Test

Like someone else pointed out, speculating about the nature of blood while I'm bleeding out from multiple stab wounds is rather pointless.

petiot

thank you for all the replies

Katie09

My p-doc told me that alcohol dependence is the same as alcoholism, but that the DSM-IV simply calls it dependence now as it's less perjorative. Frankly, I like that because if one is dependent at one time in one's life, it's not a label that someone has to use to describe oneself constantly (which is not to say one can or should drink again someday). Anyway, just thought I'd share what my shrink told me.

Thanks for the thought provoking question.