ViciousCycle

There, I said it. I have been thinking about this for over a week. I am just over 6 weeks now and I guess the rose-colored glasses have lost their tint.

I am fortunate to have little or no cravings for alcohol...
I am thankful for my overall good health....
I am pretty much content with my life.......
I am so very thankful for all of you.......

I have been eating right, getting good sleep, working out and getting ready for this season of work.....but here I sit...wondering what is next? Why did the parade stop? Where did the glow of all this go?

Is this it?

Music man

now we start to live.
for example I started to take guitar lessons again, even though I have been playing for 20 + years. I have become active in AA. And pretty much have been like 3 people at work.
Take a look at the garden and pay attention to it. I have started to learn how to enjoy the things I have been missing.

nelco

that quote you have by Abraham Lincoln might be worth looking at again......



Life is for living, you are now free from the chains of alcohol so start living. ,
well done on your 6 weeks

getr345

Nobody ever promised you a rose garden or a parade.

If the alternative is misery, drunkenness, and death...I'll take BLAH.

Because at least I know my BLAH is real.

weekendbinger

I feel exactly like you VC! We are thankful and appreciative of our results, but a part of us has died. As awful as that part was....it was sometimes fun. That fun is now gone so we have to figure out how to live without it. It's not easy.

snowdog

VC, you are far ahead of me in this crazy journey so I have no words of wisdom to offer you, but will be very interested to read the responses you get.

Thinking of you and wishing your 'blahs' away!

Mattcake

Gratitude for having a new chance is always good, especially considering that not everyone is as lucky

allport

I have suffered with this in the past and it has lead me to relapse (or been my excuse anyway).

My life when I was drinking wasn't exactly a laugh a minute but that aside I'm trying to come to terms with the fact that I will sometimes be bored, fed up and frustrated and that it is the same for everyone.

Even people who have no problems with alcohol or addiction don't have perfectly happy lives, things do get flat in recovery but I have got to learn not to expect to feel good all the time.

I want a normal life and if that means dealing with the blah days I will gladly take it.

I hope I don't lose the feelings I have at the moment but I will have to try and deal with it when I do.

Well done on the 6 weeks by the way and I will stop rambling now!

Richard54

I'm feeling much the same.

I sure don't want to start drinking again though, that would be a disaster.

Been getting into things I didn't do while drinking like photography, brushing up on playing jazz on my guitars, lots of fresh air walks, hikes, cleaning up my motorcycle and other stuff I didn't do while sitting around drinking.

But, I hear yah, I've been getting the feeling of ....now what?

Actually, I have a list of local AA meetings and will probably go check one out soon.
Have not been to one yet, it can't hurt, I don't want to drink anymore and maybe that might help.

Keep strong Vicious!

shaun00

I get these flat periods.........and they are just that i guess.
Life on life terms can be tough at times.....
And have nothing to do with wanting to get blasted...

i believe i cope with life better becuse i have a pogram of recovery..as outlined in the big book.....i can only share my experience and that is it..

Believe me i have sat in AA meeting saying to myself.....i cant do this cult bs
or "you didnt drink like me"....but in the end after nearly going nuts i tried it.

for me going to endless AA meeting wont keep me sober...but working a program with a sponsor has really helped with all the "life"
problems...

There is also other programs available.....mr doorknob will be glad to give you details of some im sure..
I dont have much knowlege of them but i know they work for some.

thankyou for your friendship....you have made this old trucker smile often.

keep smiling.....your work through it im sure.........trucker..age 42..lol..lol

Fubarcdn

I am on the same page as you are VC. Gotta get off my rump and find some new interests. When I go by the bars I used to go to and peek inside the others don't seem to be crazy happy either.
Finding alternatives is the next phase of my journey.

Richard54

I'm also thinking that spring is coming.

The birds will be chirping and the blooms will be out, as the earth comes alive again.

That always cheered me up some, even when I was drunk.

Iriss

So happy for you to have six weeks... When I feel like that, I almost become complacent, and that is a very dangerous time for me...I relapse..

I think I would preferr be on an even level, although yes sometime boring, I know that highs are always accompanied by bigger lows...xx

ViciousCycle

Thanks to everyone for your replies ......I got something from each of your posts. Wanted to share some words someone PM'd me to add to the mix. I thought she really hit the nail on the head.....

californiapoppy

Lincoln also said something like, most people are happy once they have decided to be. Do your best to only see the good side of things...that might help

yeahgr8

Luckily for me i don't know what you mean? I've only been sober 5 months, i can't imagine ever sitting here and saying blah to sobriety?! make some big life changing decisions, you can do what the **** you want now! Is it just you, do you have kids, have you got a partner, what job do you do? What's making it blah? Don't get it?

Aysha

The excitement of getting sober is dieing. Now you have to find the excitement in stayin that way.

Congrats on 6 weeks.

Rusty Zipper

VC nah, they just have some dust on them...

wipe them off, and let the real world begin!

recovery is a process, and its up to us what we put into that process...

good wishes VC

DeepBlue

My goodness - I never realised that a sense of "blahness" was so common amongst us all (me too). I reckon that recovery experts ought to work on developing some effective strategies for this stage, as it is so common and so dangerous in terms of relapse.

I was thinking...in most literature and TV/films....the villain is often more colourful and "interesting" than the good guy who often appears quite bland by comparison. Well, our villain is alcohol?

The concensu here is that a void needs to be filled - some do it by following the AA steps, some find new hobbies, some find new people. I haven't found anything yet.....but am working on it!

DB

KindBird

Yes - I am with you on this one VC.. My feeling is more like blandness - with moments of small ups, not such downs but an evenness that I am really not used to.. I am realizing that I have to do some work on replacing some of the space that alcohol took up in my life.. Not sure what the new things will be but trying to keep my mind open.

You sound like you are doing some good things - the sobriety and eating well, etc.. Good feedback on this thread too..

This sobriety stuff is taking some getting used to!

You have such a great sense of humor - maybe stand up comedy for you??