2 drink limit?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2003
Location: chicago IL
Posts: 38
2 drink limit?
I thought things were getting better. AH saw specialist and is going back tomorrow. But in the mean time told me that he had 2 drinks at dinner Fri nite! Said his problem is binge drinking and he can stop at 2 drinks. Thought my head would explode. Is it possible for him to live his life with only 2 drinks? I guess I already know the answer to that one. Can binge drinkers limit and drink without going overboard? I thought he was getting over this to easy. Please any feedback will be appreciated. Thanks
Hello sadwife.
I would share your skepticism. However, such things are unknowable with any certainty. The only recovery you can work is your own. Try to leave this up to him. If it won't work, it will become obvious soon enough. In the meantime... try to get your mind off of it and do something nice for you.
Hugs,
Smoke
I would share your skepticism. However, such things are unknowable with any certainty. The only recovery you can work is your own. Try to leave this up to him. If it won't work, it will become obvious soon enough. In the meantime... try to get your mind off of it and do something nice for you.
Hugs,
Smoke
Hi Sadwife - "controlled" drinking/using is something that a lot of alcoholics/addicts like to think they can do, and I believe that it can be a stage along the way to acceptance of true powerlessness over the substance in question. IMHO, it's an example of diseased thinking, and most alcoholics/addicts quickly learn that there is no such thing as control over their DOC - that's what makes them alcoholics/addicts in the first place.
Just my 2 cents!
Ditto to Smoke's wise words!
Just my 2 cents!
Ditto to Smoke's wise words!
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: OR
Posts: 18
Hi there,
Well, from my experience the answer would be no. MY H would limit himself for awhile and I thought oh, thats not so bad. Then it started to be more then more until he was back to himself or worse. But, maybe in your H case that is not so. Everyone is so different. I think a couple drinks could lead to more. Sorry, this is not more positive for you. Just keep taking one day at a time. Let go and Let God. I do lots of praying that helps me take my mind off alot of my worries. take care, Snoopy
Well, from my experience the answer would be no. MY H would limit himself for awhile and I thought oh, thats not so bad. Then it started to be more then more until he was back to himself or worse. But, maybe in your H case that is not so. Everyone is so different. I think a couple drinks could lead to more. Sorry, this is not more positive for you. Just keep taking one day at a time. Let go and Let God. I do lots of praying that helps me take my mind off alot of my worries. take care, Snoopy
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2003
Location: chicago IL
Posts: 38
Thats what I kinda thought. Just when you think things are looking up. I guess I do have to stop thinking about him and concentrate on myself. I just feel so let down by him. I guess I am just feeling sorry for myself. I will just have to get on with my life. Thanks for the quick responses!
spontaneous combustion
Originally posted by sadwife
Thought my head would explode.
Thought my head would explode.
There is another thread posted here recently where the term "too much" was used. This seems to be one of the common traits to indicate a problem. They can't bear to imagine a future without alcohol, so they attempt to bargain with the devil. My AH used to line up his empties in an attempt to count how many he was drinking.
I've since realized that anyone who DOESN'T have a problem with alcohol can do COMPLETELY without it and be at peace. If they hang on .... even to one drink a day, there's a problem.
Toby Rice Drews has a book called "Getting Them Sober". (The title is misleading -- the book is actually a guidebook to help us - those who live with them). She makes the case that ANY amount of alcohol in their bodies will not only continue the dependency, it will make the disease progress. I suggest you get a copy of her book -- it will help with dealing with that "head exploding" feeling.
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: San Jose, CA
Posts: 19
My husband thinks that he can control his addictions by just drinking beer...no hard alcohol and then shows up with a pint, sometimes he drinks it before he gets home.
My experience is that the only true "control" is abstinance which I've yet to see in my husband's case. I have hope, but its dim hope
I think you just have to give it time to see if he can control it. Some can...many can't!
My experience is that the only true "control" is abstinance which I've yet to see in my husband's case. I have hope, but its dim hope
I think you just have to give it time to see if he can control it. Some can...many can't!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: LA, CA
Posts: 7
2 drinks
Originally Posted by sadwife
I thought things were getting better. AH saw specialist and is going back tomorrow. But in the mean time told me that he had 2 drinks at dinner Fri nite! Said his problem is binge drinking and he can stop at 2 drinks. Thought my head would explode. Is it possible for him to live his life with only 2 drinks? I guess I already know the answer to that one. Can binge drinkers limit and drink without going overboard? I thought he was getting over this to easy. Please any feedback will be appreciated. Thanks
that is why they need to stop drinking all together.. i am new to this post, i am hoping to find support and i can see i have already , i am going to alanon starting on monday.. i have been told if we make changes in our life styles they will follow our lead. i am willing to try anything.. i hope this helps you....
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 8,709
Originally Posted by margo
Hi Sadwife - "controlled" drinking/using is something that a lot of alcoholics/addicts like to think they can do, and I believe that it can be a stage along the way to acceptance of true powerlessness over the substance in question. IMHO, it's an example of diseased thinking, and most alcoholics/addicts quickly learn that there is no such thing as control over their DOC - that's what makes them alcoholics/addicts in the first place.
Best wishes to you.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 5
My experience with my binge drinking husband is that once he starts... he doesn't stop until he passes out or is physically removed from the premises. He blacks out and doesn't remember a thing, therefore for him these episodes are never really that bad or serious. For me, taking the focus off the alcoholic and on to myself is very difficult...because I still feel that HB is the root of all problems, I know that is flawed thinking, but it is my honest gut reaction to his drinking and the problems that always follows. Take care of yourself.
Hi Sadwife,
Good news! The idea of "controlled drinking" is one of the stages along the way towards us alcoholics bottoming out. We go through a stage where we think we can control it and we try only to fall flat on our faces.
He'll find out...........in the mean time for you, Alanon!
All you can do.
Ngaire
Good news! The idea of "controlled drinking" is one of the stages along the way towards us alcoholics bottoming out. We go through a stage where we think we can control it and we try only to fall flat on our faces.
He'll find out...........in the mean time for you, Alanon!
All you can do.
Ngaire
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