how to stay sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
how to stay sober
For newcomers, in the format of sobriety date, initial action took to get sober, ongoing actions to stay sober so,
15th October 2008
Alcohol Counselor, prescribed antabuse and anti depressant
Attended first AA meeting last week, continued counselling twice a week, one to one and group for social anxiety
Thought this might give some good information so they can make informed choices on their route to sobriety as there is a lot of debate about different ways to get sober.
15th October 2008
Alcohol Counselor, prescribed antabuse and anti depressant
Attended first AA meeting last week, continued counselling twice a week, one to one and group for social anxiety
Thought this might give some good information so they can make informed choices on their route to sobriety as there is a lot of debate about different ways to get sober.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
This promises to be an interesting thread....Thanks!
Jan. '85
After being diagnosed with situational depression
my doctor suggested AA. Off I went.
I did return to drinking....for about 4 years.
I was in and out of AA ...up and down like a Yo-Yo.
In April of '89 I read "Under The Influence"
Eureka! I was not doomed to fail I was not hexed!
I re connected to God and AA and have not had another drink.
Please find something that works for you ...don't die from alcohol.
Thanks for letting me share the joy of recovery....
Jan. '85
After being diagnosed with situational depression
my doctor suggested AA. Off I went.
I did return to drinking....for about 4 years.
I was in and out of AA ...up and down like a Yo-Yo.
In April of '89 I read "Under The Influence"
Eureka! I was not doomed to fail I was not hexed!
I re connected to God and AA and have not had another drink.
Please find something that works for you ...don't die from alcohol.
Thanks for letting me share the joy of recovery....
Living in sobriety
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Sick and tired of been sick and tired, Depressed and suicidal
April 1998
picked up the phone asked for help. Went to rehab. Found a solution..alcoholics anonymous.
Went to AA , got a sponser, got honest and started the steps.
Through the grace of God and the fellowship of alcoholics anonymous I have not had to have another drink..
April 1998
picked up the phone asked for help. Went to rehab. Found a solution..alcoholics anonymous.
Went to AA , got a sponser, got honest and started the steps.
Through the grace of God and the fellowship of alcoholics anonymous I have not had to have another drink..
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
4:30pm June 7, 1981 knew I was dying. That if I continued to drink, I would die, and if I tried to stop I would die, but wanted to die sober.
4:28pm June 8, 1981 ER Dr was writing TOD on my ER chart and my heart started on it's own. Came to on medical floor later that evening with IVs in both legs and both arms.
June 12 1981, went to Women's Odyssey House (A Recovery Home for Alcoholic Women) in Canoga Park. There were rules there. Had to go to 5 outside AA meetings a week. Had to get a job. Had to get a sponsor. Had to help with household chores. Had to attend the 3 AA meetings in the house, unless was working at time of meeting, etc
AA, my sponsor and lots of hard work learning how to LIVE and ENJOY life sober, since then.
This was and is the HARDEST thing I have ever tried to do in my life. I was always a great STARTER of some new project but a chitty finisher. NOT THIS TIME.
I only hope and pray that each of you can find a 'program', a 'process', a 'whatever' that works for you so that you too can find the life I have found for all these years now.
J M H O
Love and hugs,
4:28pm June 8, 1981 ER Dr was writing TOD on my ER chart and my heart started on it's own. Came to on medical floor later that evening with IVs in both legs and both arms.
June 12 1981, went to Women's Odyssey House (A Recovery Home for Alcoholic Women) in Canoga Park. There were rules there. Had to go to 5 outside AA meetings a week. Had to get a job. Had to get a sponsor. Had to help with household chores. Had to attend the 3 AA meetings in the house, unless was working at time of meeting, etc
AA, my sponsor and lots of hard work learning how to LIVE and ENJOY life sober, since then.
This was and is the HARDEST thing I have ever tried to do in my life. I was always a great STARTER of some new project but a chitty finisher. NOT THIS TIME.
I only hope and pray that each of you can find a 'program', a 'process', a 'whatever' that works for you so that you too can find the life I have found for all these years now.
J M H O
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: my room in ct.
Posts: 58,110
march of 3/15/03
i surrendered to the problem, booze, dope and me!
went to some AA meetings
got some hope...
3/26/03, got one day clean...
did the real long hard work of following the path of the 12 steps...
looked at the problem, and became the solution...
today, whos got it better then me!
even when the shhitt fairy lands!
if one wants to get better, its oh so doable...
find somthing that works for you, put your ass into it, get a emotional rearangement, and live life, as life is...
it really isn't so bad...
good wishes...
rz
i surrendered to the problem, booze, dope and me!
went to some AA meetings
got some hope...
3/26/03, got one day clean...
did the real long hard work of following the path of the 12 steps...
looked at the problem, and became the solution...
today, whos got it better then me!
even when the shhitt fairy lands!
if one wants to get better, its oh so doable...
find somthing that works for you, put your ass into it, get a emotional rearangement, and live life, as life is...
it really isn't so bad...
good wishes...
rz
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Great thread, short success stories and what led to the success, I like it.
Early Sept. 2006, wife told me that in Oct. her and the kids were moving out. I thought that was great so I went back out to the garage to continue drinking. Had a moment of clarity where I saw the loss of everything and everyone in less then a year if I continued to drink and then a slow, lonely death from alcoholism........................
This scared the crap out of me, I had spent years trying everything to stop and stay stopped and the only thing it led to was the need to drink every day just to fuction and not start going crazy and getting sick.
I felt hopeless, I pulled out my wallet and called the Drug & Alcohol hotline for my health insurance company and called the number.
Saw an awesome doctor and he was the first person I was ever totally honest with about my drinking. I thought he would put me on some meds and send me on my way, instead he told me that I would have to be medically detoxed because I could die detoxing myself.
Sept. 17th 2006, spent the entire day drinking in my garage..... amking sure I drank every thing I had stashed in my truck and garage. (I still find some every once in a while!) Thise was the date of my last drink!
Sept. 18th 2006, I went into detox, this was my first day without a drink in 5 years. This was also the date of my first AA meeting sober, I had gone to one about 5 years before drunk and never went back.
Sept. 21st 2006, my head was clearing up a bit and I heard them say to us that if we wanted a CHANCE to stay sober to go to at least 90 AA meetings in 90 days and get a sponsor!
Sept. 23rd 2006, I got out of detox and damn near stopped and grabbed a 12 pack for the ride home, instead I prayed and prayed and prayed my whole way home, hugged the wife and kids and went to an AA meeting & got a temporary sponsor.
Sometime in early December after going to at least 1 AA meeting a day, I had a REALLY bad day, got POed and came VERY close to getting a 12 pack.............. but instead I called another guy in AA and within 5 minutes I was okay.
About a week later I started to notice that almost every single person I knew in AA with what I wanted, which was long term sobriety and a serene happy life had taken the steps of AA with a sponsor, I got a different sponsor & I took the steps with his guidance.
Sometime in January of 2007 as I was taking the steps, the obsession to drink was totally lifted, I bacame a free man, free of alcohol & self!
In April of 2007 I started to pass it on to my first sponsee.
My wife & I are still together.
My children today respect, love, & look to me for guidance instead of hiding from me like when I was drinking.
I have REAL friends today that are but a phone call away..... not drinking buddies, they all dissappeared when I quit.
Today I am a part of the world instead of on the outside looking in through the fog of the booze.
Any active alcoholic can have this, it does not have to be AA, but some manner of not trying to battle this ALONE!
AA was what has worked for me, if AA is not for you, try other programs.
No matter what path one chooses, getting sober and staying sober involves far more then just not drinking, it involves CHANGE & GROWTH as a human being. This takes work, what ever path one chooses they have to work it and be willing to change paths instead of drinking and to work that path.
Early Sept. 2006, wife told me that in Oct. her and the kids were moving out. I thought that was great so I went back out to the garage to continue drinking. Had a moment of clarity where I saw the loss of everything and everyone in less then a year if I continued to drink and then a slow, lonely death from alcoholism........................
This scared the crap out of me, I had spent years trying everything to stop and stay stopped and the only thing it led to was the need to drink every day just to fuction and not start going crazy and getting sick.
I felt hopeless, I pulled out my wallet and called the Drug & Alcohol hotline for my health insurance company and called the number.
Saw an awesome doctor and he was the first person I was ever totally honest with about my drinking. I thought he would put me on some meds and send me on my way, instead he told me that I would have to be medically detoxed because I could die detoxing myself.
Sept. 17th 2006, spent the entire day drinking in my garage..... amking sure I drank every thing I had stashed in my truck and garage. (I still find some every once in a while!) Thise was the date of my last drink!
Sept. 18th 2006, I went into detox, this was my first day without a drink in 5 years. This was also the date of my first AA meeting sober, I had gone to one about 5 years before drunk and never went back.
Sept. 21st 2006, my head was clearing up a bit and I heard them say to us that if we wanted a CHANCE to stay sober to go to at least 90 AA meetings in 90 days and get a sponsor!
Sept. 23rd 2006, I got out of detox and damn near stopped and grabbed a 12 pack for the ride home, instead I prayed and prayed and prayed my whole way home, hugged the wife and kids and went to an AA meeting & got a temporary sponsor.
Sometime in early December after going to at least 1 AA meeting a day, I had a REALLY bad day, got POed and came VERY close to getting a 12 pack.............. but instead I called another guy in AA and within 5 minutes I was okay.
About a week later I started to notice that almost every single person I knew in AA with what I wanted, which was long term sobriety and a serene happy life had taken the steps of AA with a sponsor, I got a different sponsor & I took the steps with his guidance.
Sometime in January of 2007 as I was taking the steps, the obsession to drink was totally lifted, I bacame a free man, free of alcohol & self!
In April of 2007 I started to pass it on to my first sponsee.
My wife & I are still together.
My children today respect, love, & look to me for guidance instead of hiding from me like when I was drinking.
I have REAL friends today that are but a phone call away..... not drinking buddies, they all dissappeared when I quit.
Today I am a part of the world instead of on the outside looking in through the fog of the booze.
Any active alcoholic can have this, it does not have to be AA, but some manner of not trying to battle this ALONE!
AA was what has worked for me, if AA is not for you, try other programs.
No matter what path one chooses, getting sober and staying sober involves far more then just not drinking, it involves CHANGE & GROWTH as a human being. This takes work, what ever path one chooses they have to work it and be willing to change paths instead of drinking and to work that path.
Om, Aum, Ohm...
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh
Posts: 4,797
28 October 2002
detoxed in a psychiatric facility for 7 days, spent 28 days in a hospital-based rehab, began meetings (at first, both NA & AA; now, primarily AA), got a sponsor, took the steps, learned to live the steps, kept putting one foot in front of the other
Peace & Love,
Sugah
detoxed in a psychiatric facility for 7 days, spent 28 days in a hospital-based rehab, began meetings (at first, both NA & AA; now, primarily AA), got a sponsor, took the steps, learned to live the steps, kept putting one foot in front of the other
Peace & Love,
Sugah
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 700
Feb 4th 1986
In a blackout I threatened to kill my Dad.
It had to be stopped. Was afraid I would wake up in jail after a blackout not knowing what I did.
I knew somebody (my sponsor) that was in AA, and he took me to my first meeting. In AA I found hope and a program of action that led me to a power that keeps my happy and sober.
Nice thread
In a blackout I threatened to kill my Dad.
It had to be stopped. Was afraid I would wake up in jail after a blackout not knowing what I did.
I knew somebody (my sponsor) that was in AA, and he took me to my first meeting. In AA I found hope and a program of action that led me to a power that keeps my happy and sober.
Nice thread
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,861
October 15,1989 ( I think, at least it was the one we picked) I woke up in a corn field, I looked up to the sky and said "God I don't want to live like this anymore" It was the most honest prayer I had ever said.
I went to AA meetings for two months and felt like I was crawling out of my skin. Just not drinking and going to meetings felt like a death sentence for me. I remember sitting in a meeting on a friday night, telling myself I was gonna go get drunk. If this was all there was to sobriety (sodriety more like it!) Then I would rather escape into the bottle. At least there was some comfort there. As I listened to everyone share in the meeting they only confirmed what I had suspected ( they were full of...). The man sitting immediately to my right began to share, as he spoke I felt like I knew him ( turns out I did), he was an old drinking buddy of mine. As he spoke I could tell something was different about him. Something had happened but I wasn't quite sure, one thing was certain, he seemed happy. I latched onto this guy after the meeting. We started going all over the place together. He introduced me to my first real AA sponsor ( I had had sponsors before this but they all majored in catch phrases and telling me how good I was doing). This man began to take me through the steps as they are outlined in the Big Book and the rest as they say is history...
I have had an amazing life because of those 12 steps. I learned to trust God and find purpose and honor in my life. I was 22 when I got here, I could not read very well and I was not a good student of the steps. I struggled the first 4 1/2 years. My ego got in the way more often than I would have liked, but through it all, I faced life sober.
I am today a happy man. There is a difference between happiness and bliss. I replaced the bliss of the bottle and narcotics for the happiness of living a decent life.
The only advice I have is to work the steps, if you get a sponsor who you have to ask permission to work steps then you do not have a sponsor, you have a boss. The examples in the Big Book are as true today as they were in 1939. Dr Bob began making amends on day 2. There is no timeline on how and when to start working the steps, it is your recovery and you are responsible for treating your spiritual condition. Happiness awaits.
I went to AA meetings for two months and felt like I was crawling out of my skin. Just not drinking and going to meetings felt like a death sentence for me. I remember sitting in a meeting on a friday night, telling myself I was gonna go get drunk. If this was all there was to sobriety (sodriety more like it!) Then I would rather escape into the bottle. At least there was some comfort there. As I listened to everyone share in the meeting they only confirmed what I had suspected ( they were full of...). The man sitting immediately to my right began to share, as he spoke I felt like I knew him ( turns out I did), he was an old drinking buddy of mine. As he spoke I could tell something was different about him. Something had happened but I wasn't quite sure, one thing was certain, he seemed happy. I latched onto this guy after the meeting. We started going all over the place together. He introduced me to my first real AA sponsor ( I had had sponsors before this but they all majored in catch phrases and telling me how good I was doing). This man began to take me through the steps as they are outlined in the Big Book and the rest as they say is history...
I have had an amazing life because of those 12 steps. I learned to trust God and find purpose and honor in my life. I was 22 when I got here, I could not read very well and I was not a good student of the steps. I struggled the first 4 1/2 years. My ego got in the way more often than I would have liked, but through it all, I faced life sober.
I am today a happy man. There is a difference between happiness and bliss. I replaced the bliss of the bottle and narcotics for the happiness of living a decent life.
The only advice I have is to work the steps, if you get a sponsor who you have to ask permission to work steps then you do not have a sponsor, you have a boss. The examples in the Big Book are as true today as they were in 1939. Dr Bob began making amends on day 2. There is no timeline on how and when to start working the steps, it is your recovery and you are responsible for treating your spiritual condition. Happiness awaits.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,876
June 1st 2007....decided I needed to change. Went to an aa meeting...disagreed with 95% of what I heard but stayed anyway. I utilized the fellowship for peer support until I felt I was strong enough to continue on my own. I now follow a very simple plan...I don't drink...ever. I now have my life back...alcohol has lost its power over me. I have regained everything I had lost...I realized the disease that I have is one that I can catch from open bottles...so I stay away from open bottles.
Psalm 118:24
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
Admitting, accepting, getting honest with my drinking problem.
Not drinking one day at a time. Nothing orginal, I was all concerned with never drinking the rest of my life and was told, just don't drink today.
I could grasp that concept.
All in all, it was complete surrender
Not drinking one day at a time. Nothing orginal, I was all concerned with never drinking the rest of my life and was told, just don't drink today.
I could grasp that concept.
All in all, it was complete surrender
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,697
Dec 25 2000 - drunk and slept through Christmas dinner, family was all together and sat me down telling me I needed help. I agreed to enter a detox - stayed 10 days to safely get me off booze (consumption was quite high and regular). Went to first AA meeting in detox center - don't remember much of it, but I did manage to get that book they were talking about (after explaining to the guy that they took my wallet away from me so I didn't have $7 but would have a check cut to him..he gave in. Began attending outpatient treatment at a local hospital upon my release.
Jan 15 2001 - on the way to outpatient treatment (was from 7am to 4pm M-F) I pulled off the freeway - went to a liqour store, bought a bottle, rented a motel room - drank until I passed out . Two days later my aunt (an AA) tracked me down and I admitted that I drank again (I had rented out 3 different rooms - 2 hotels and 1 motel and had them all stocked with liqour...I lived within 2 miles of each).
Jan 18 2001- entered first of 3 inpatient treatment facilities. HATED it..rules and all those losers who were happy to be there. I was NEVER going to go through that again - got a sponsor in AA. He told me to go to meetings, I did..told me to write about why I am powerless over alcohol - so I did an essay. He was soo impressed that he wanted to share it with others, I thought "these people have no education, I dazzled them with words"..I stopped going to meetings but did show up Jan 18 2002 and took a cake (I did stay sober for over a year).
October 2002 - moved into a new place..was away from family friends etc..bought my roommates a case of beer the night I moved in for helping me. The next night I bought and drank a 750ml bottle of Jack Daniels - I continued this until I almost lost my job and ended up hospitalized again. Entered a detox/treatment center and checked myself out after 4 days because I made $xxxx per year and couldn't afford to lose my job. I saw a Dr who put me out on stress leave from work (fully paid)...ended up in another inpatient 4 weeks later (pretty much drank 1-2 bottles of jack daniels every single day) after 5 days in detox. Had a great time in rehab - beautiful place in the mountains, cute girls - got into AA, hooked up with my old sponsor again and started hanging out at meetings and getting "involved" with AA.... returned to work and got promoted within 3 weeks.
June/July 2005 - sitting in an airport to visit a girl I was dating who was away at grad school - I thought a vodka tonic would be nice before the flight. She didn't know about my alcohol problem - I spent the weekend drinking in a city where nobody knew me and nobody really cared that I was drinking. The girl thought my consumption levels were quite high - but she liked to have a drink now and again too, afterall - I was on vacation.
August 2005 - took stress leave from work again (Dr wrote me another note), locked myself in a room and drank around the clock - vodka. I cleaned that room out about 18 months ago - there were more than 50 bottles that I had never thrown out and had hidden so well that I forgot about them. December 12 2005 - entered 3rd inpatient treatment after hospitilization stayed for 2 months. Got into AA, began to pray and find some attraction in spiritual matters. Made some good friends that worked AA as it should - hung out with them, journaled daily, told everyone I had a sponsor and was doing the steps. Read a lot of spiritual books and felt good for the first time in years. Returned to work, and was promoted AGAIN upon my return. Met a girl when I was 10 months sober - she didn't really drink and knew I didn't drink at all. Life was really good. Making more money than I ever thought I would. I was truly happy, and sober. lost touch with AA friends...but took a cake at 1 year and told everyone my drunkalog and tales of rehab (I miss rehab sometimes - it is nice to go back and visit now).
End of Feb 2007 - normal day, good mood. Went to brothers house to watch a hockey game (Ottowa vs Buffalo - the second of a home and home series where the first game had a huge brawl, so we were looking forward to the encore). Left to go home - here it gets foggy...I actually don't remember what happened.
Woke up 4 days later, drunk with bottles all over my room and 50 voicemails. I drank! I didnt even remember taking the first drink or going back and buying all those bottles. I had told everyone I had the flu (from what they told me).
I didn't want to drink. I didn't think about drinking. It was like one moment I was sober and happy (14 months sober..thank you very much)...the next moment I was drunk and had no idea why or how. I had to be medically withdrawn..girlfriend locked me in her apartment and administered the medicine the doctors gave...I had no wallet, no money, no keys..like a scene out of trainspotting. Awful withdraw, I thought I would die.
I prayed - and nothing happened. I called an AA buddy - he was smoking crack. I called another - he talked me down and I didn't feel so guilty. Two days later my crack smoking AA friend called me and gave me a number to call - I did.
I met with the guy who's number I was given and he is an AA member - 19 years sober at the time. I told him I never wanted to drink again and I don't know why I did and I was scared and didn't know what else to do....I wanted to keep drinking, but knew it would probably mean a death like the character in leaving Las Vegas - I had enough money to run and live in hotels and hide and buy all the liqour I wanted. He said "we first need to find out if you have alcoholism." We opened the book to the title page and read outloud.
If he said to pray - I prayed. I the book made a statement, we turned it into a question "Is this relevant to me?"...somewhere in the first few weeks, sober - I lost all hope that I was gonna stay sober. Alcoholism does not paint a pretty picture and in that hopelessness I gave up thinking there was anything that "I" could do - and I started moving my feet. Did what I was advised to do...
Words don't do it justice..really. I wish for everyone to have the experience that I had and continue to have doing the steps and waking up somewhere during that process. It's truly a miracle - I should be dead.
Jan 15 2001 - on the way to outpatient treatment (was from 7am to 4pm M-F) I pulled off the freeway - went to a liqour store, bought a bottle, rented a motel room - drank until I passed out . Two days later my aunt (an AA) tracked me down and I admitted that I drank again (I had rented out 3 different rooms - 2 hotels and 1 motel and had them all stocked with liqour...I lived within 2 miles of each).
Jan 18 2001- entered first of 3 inpatient treatment facilities. HATED it..rules and all those losers who were happy to be there. I was NEVER going to go through that again - got a sponsor in AA. He told me to go to meetings, I did..told me to write about why I am powerless over alcohol - so I did an essay. He was soo impressed that he wanted to share it with others, I thought "these people have no education, I dazzled them with words"..I stopped going to meetings but did show up Jan 18 2002 and took a cake (I did stay sober for over a year).
October 2002 - moved into a new place..was away from family friends etc..bought my roommates a case of beer the night I moved in for helping me. The next night I bought and drank a 750ml bottle of Jack Daniels - I continued this until I almost lost my job and ended up hospitalized again. Entered a detox/treatment center and checked myself out after 4 days because I made $xxxx per year and couldn't afford to lose my job. I saw a Dr who put me out on stress leave from work (fully paid)...ended up in another inpatient 4 weeks later (pretty much drank 1-2 bottles of jack daniels every single day) after 5 days in detox. Had a great time in rehab - beautiful place in the mountains, cute girls - got into AA, hooked up with my old sponsor again and started hanging out at meetings and getting "involved" with AA.... returned to work and got promoted within 3 weeks.
June/July 2005 - sitting in an airport to visit a girl I was dating who was away at grad school - I thought a vodka tonic would be nice before the flight. She didn't know about my alcohol problem - I spent the weekend drinking in a city where nobody knew me and nobody really cared that I was drinking. The girl thought my consumption levels were quite high - but she liked to have a drink now and again too, afterall - I was on vacation.
August 2005 - took stress leave from work again (Dr wrote me another note), locked myself in a room and drank around the clock - vodka. I cleaned that room out about 18 months ago - there were more than 50 bottles that I had never thrown out and had hidden so well that I forgot about them. December 12 2005 - entered 3rd inpatient treatment after hospitilization stayed for 2 months. Got into AA, began to pray and find some attraction in spiritual matters. Made some good friends that worked AA as it should - hung out with them, journaled daily, told everyone I had a sponsor and was doing the steps. Read a lot of spiritual books and felt good for the first time in years. Returned to work, and was promoted AGAIN upon my return. Met a girl when I was 10 months sober - she didn't really drink and knew I didn't drink at all. Life was really good. Making more money than I ever thought I would. I was truly happy, and sober. lost touch with AA friends...but took a cake at 1 year and told everyone my drunkalog and tales of rehab (I miss rehab sometimes - it is nice to go back and visit now).
End of Feb 2007 - normal day, good mood. Went to brothers house to watch a hockey game (Ottowa vs Buffalo - the second of a home and home series where the first game had a huge brawl, so we were looking forward to the encore). Left to go home - here it gets foggy...I actually don't remember what happened.
Woke up 4 days later, drunk with bottles all over my room and 50 voicemails. I drank! I didnt even remember taking the first drink or going back and buying all those bottles. I had told everyone I had the flu (from what they told me).
I didn't want to drink. I didn't think about drinking. It was like one moment I was sober and happy (14 months sober..thank you very much)...the next moment I was drunk and had no idea why or how. I had to be medically withdrawn..girlfriend locked me in her apartment and administered the medicine the doctors gave...I had no wallet, no money, no keys..like a scene out of trainspotting. Awful withdraw, I thought I would die.
I prayed - and nothing happened. I called an AA buddy - he was smoking crack. I called another - he talked me down and I didn't feel so guilty. Two days later my crack smoking AA friend called me and gave me a number to call - I did.
I met with the guy who's number I was given and he is an AA member - 19 years sober at the time. I told him I never wanted to drink again and I don't know why I did and I was scared and didn't know what else to do....I wanted to keep drinking, but knew it would probably mean a death like the character in leaving Las Vegas - I had enough money to run and live in hotels and hide and buy all the liqour I wanted. He said "we first need to find out if you have alcoholism." We opened the book to the title page and read outloud.
If he said to pray - I prayed. I the book made a statement, we turned it into a question "Is this relevant to me?"...somewhere in the first few weeks, sober - I lost all hope that I was gonna stay sober. Alcoholism does not paint a pretty picture and in that hopelessness I gave up thinking there was anything that "I" could do - and I started moving my feet. Did what I was advised to do...
Words don't do it justice..really. I wish for everyone to have the experience that I had and continue to have doing the steps and waking up somewhere during that process. It's truly a miracle - I should be dead.
A new dawn and new chapter
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
December 13th 2008: Decided why not, I think I earned it and I bought a 30pk of beer and commenced to drinking myself stupid. It took me a full 9-12 beers to numb away all the negative feelings that were going through my head and had that same old feeling I was after. don't remember much after that...
December 14th 2008: Woke up feeling not so bad (half drunk still) and went on about my day till midmorning. Then that's when the withdraws kicked in. Came here to SR but felt to ashamed to post since I think if you backtrack through threads I started over the years I have well over a dozen "I fu***d up and drank last night" threads out there. Went through the rest of the day reading and feeling like crap.
December 15th 2008: Still feel like hell but better functioning. Something serious snaped in me. I was thourghly disgusted with my life, I wanted out of it at whatever cost, and if that was quitting drinknig and learning to live sober so be it! I threw out all things booze related.
December 19th 2008: I got really ill which made the intial wanting to quit easier since I felt like death re-heated and in no way wanted a drink. I contnue to feel under the weather till the end of January.
Febuary 1st 2009: After making 7 weeks I realized this was no ordinary "Man I'm going to quit drinking forever" attmpts. I made it the longest I've ever had since I started drinking 15 years ago. Strted geeting more serious about my recovery program. Started posting more on here (after being a member for nearly 4 years!) Getting my hands on everything I can read and asking questions about sobriety. Really wishing PAWS would get a life and leave me alone. But hey, It's a new life and will take getting some use to before they leave or get to a managable level.
Febuary 20th 2009: I'm 68 days sober, feeling better but this past week was a really hard one. Yesterday I had to go in to put my Dog to sleep
but I did something I never have done in the past when I've had to do that....I stayed sober!! I didin't go running for a bottle to to numb the grief. It's been rough but the sun is shining and with eash passing day I stay sober I become stronger and more solid in my recovery!
December 14th 2008: Woke up feeling not so bad (half drunk still) and went on about my day till midmorning. Then that's when the withdraws kicked in. Came here to SR but felt to ashamed to post since I think if you backtrack through threads I started over the years I have well over a dozen "I fu***d up and drank last night" threads out there. Went through the rest of the day reading and feeling like crap.
December 15th 2008: Still feel like hell but better functioning. Something serious snaped in me. I was thourghly disgusted with my life, I wanted out of it at whatever cost, and if that was quitting drinknig and learning to live sober so be it! I threw out all things booze related.
December 19th 2008: I got really ill which made the intial wanting to quit easier since I felt like death re-heated and in no way wanted a drink. I contnue to feel under the weather till the end of January.
Febuary 1st 2009: After making 7 weeks I realized this was no ordinary "Man I'm going to quit drinking forever" attmpts. I made it the longest I've ever had since I started drinking 15 years ago. Strted geeting more serious about my recovery program. Started posting more on here (after being a member for nearly 4 years!) Getting my hands on everything I can read and asking questions about sobriety. Really wishing PAWS would get a life and leave me alone. But hey, It's a new life and will take getting some use to before they leave or get to a managable level.
Febuary 20th 2009: I'm 68 days sober, feeling better but this past week was a really hard one. Yesterday I had to go in to put my Dog to sleep
but I did something I never have done in the past when I've had to do that....I stayed sober!! I didin't go running for a bottle to to numb the grief. It's been rough but the sun is shining and with eash passing day I stay sober I become stronger and more solid in my recovery!
Karma Amputee
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Among The Living
Posts: 769
October 4 2008: Got TRASHED again, this time at a wedding reception. Was wearing a nicotine patch, doing codeine pills and drinking everything in sight. Went to bed that night after driving home completely drunk, had a bowl of pot as a 3am nightcap and thought as the room spun "if I actually wake up alive tomorrow, I'm never drinking again."
That was 139 days ago.
My life and my drinking/drugging was building up to that night and stopping drinking was on my radar for a while, but that night put me over the top so to speak. Since then, I have given up/beaten my nicotine addiction, stopped doing pain pills, and now I'm trying to quit smoking pot. Drinking had to stop first though.
That was 139 days ago.
My life and my drinking/drugging was building up to that night and stopping drinking was on my radar for a while, but that night put me over the top so to speak. Since then, I have given up/beaten my nicotine addiction, stopped doing pain pills, and now I'm trying to quit smoking pot. Drinking had to stop first though.
Thriving sober since 12/18/08
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 3,115
I'll keep it simple, I don't count my pre-attempts or drama.
12/18/08: showed up to work 'under the influence', mandatory counseling referral to keep my job.
Counseling 2x a week, lots of bibliotherapy per his recommendation, the simple desire to be DONE with my drinking career. Just moved on with my life, I've had my share. SR for some support, hubby and family for support, I don't think of drinking nor do I want one again. Tried other treatment resources, found a bunch of BS, nothing worked til I made the decision that I would never drink again.
12/18/08: showed up to work 'under the influence', mandatory counseling referral to keep my job.
Counseling 2x a week, lots of bibliotherapy per his recommendation, the simple desire to be DONE with my drinking career. Just moved on with my life, I've had my share. SR for some support, hubby and family for support, I don't think of drinking nor do I want one again. Tried other treatment resources, found a bunch of BS, nothing worked til I made the decision that I would never drink again.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Birmingham, AL
Posts: 1,924
April 28, 2003 was my first sober day; finally I wanted to live more than I wanted to die and I was willing to do anything to live free. I have never enjoyed life more since my last drink as I do now. Today I am free.
First meeting was 1977; probably January or February in Jacksonville, FL; USN and I have attended meetings since that time even when drinking, homeless or in prison.
26 - thirty day treatment centers, 8-10 halfway houses and sober houses, 3 state mental sanitariums, several Psychiatric Unit inpatient stays, jailed numerous times, 1 prison term all between 1972 and 2003.
First meeting was 1977; probably January or February in Jacksonville, FL; USN and I have attended meetings since that time even when drinking, homeless or in prison.
26 - thirty day treatment centers, 8-10 halfway houses and sober houses, 3 state mental sanitariums, several Psychiatric Unit inpatient stays, jailed numerous times, 1 prison term all between 1972 and 2003.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
April 07 - Good Friday - decided to try something different this time - came here
Learned, I hope once and for all, that I am an alcoholic - taking a drink is not any kind of solution for me, it only cements me deeper and deeper into the kind of devastation and despair I've been glad to be rid of for nearly 2 years now
It's been damned hard work, and continues to be some days, but it's the best thing I'll ever do.
I'm closer now to who I want to be.
It's a great gift
D
Learned, I hope once and for all, that I am an alcoholic - taking a drink is not any kind of solution for me, it only cements me deeper and deeper into the kind of devastation and despair I've been glad to be rid of for nearly 2 years now
It's been damned hard work, and continues to be some days, but it's the best thing I'll ever do.
I'm closer now to who I want to be.
It's a great gift
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
sobriety date sep 1st 2000
Long spiral downward into the darkness...to chronic alcoholism.
Living on the streets of uk.....drinking whatever i could get hold of.
Begging for drink money....brief trips for detox through sally army...only to get off the street not to stop....i would sneak booze in!!!
numerous prison sentences and hospital wards....
With help.....after several suicide attempts......(half hearted)...and a strange moment of clarity..or maybe not so strange..thankyou holy father.
i managed to get to a safe house...sober house i think you call it.
Had big problem trying to stay sober....few weeks....few months...etc
went on a learning curve........
Went to AA ....sat at the back and looked at girls.........got drunk.
Went to AA whinged and moan...but did sevice............got drunk.
Went to AA Red the big book.....lied...schemed......and chatted b@ullsh@t
and got drunk.
and finally.
Went to AA with a sincere desire to get and stay sober and asked for help.
My then sponsor told me EXACTLY what was wrong with me......and told me the solution..
Come to the realization that it wasn't all about booze... damn this is about me.
Began to embrace the PROGRAM of AA and things started to become clear.
I needed a program to manage my own life and to change.
Developed a strong belief in god...........turning to faith with time.
Continue to study the book book....continue to change.
Finally found my place in the world...... because i was shown the solution to my dilemma. or rather i was listening.
So i continue to pass it on.........
Thanks to many people but ultimately.......GOD...AA...
rough outline but you get the basics right?
Thanks for listening....god be with you all......
Long spiral downward into the darkness...to chronic alcoholism.
Living on the streets of uk.....drinking whatever i could get hold of.
Begging for drink money....brief trips for detox through sally army...only to get off the street not to stop....i would sneak booze in!!!
numerous prison sentences and hospital wards....
With help.....after several suicide attempts......(half hearted)...and a strange moment of clarity..or maybe not so strange..thankyou holy father.
i managed to get to a safe house...sober house i think you call it.
Had big problem trying to stay sober....few weeks....few months...etc
went on a learning curve........
Went to AA ....sat at the back and looked at girls.........got drunk.
Went to AA whinged and moan...but did sevice............got drunk.
Went to AA Red the big book.....lied...schemed......and chatted b@ullsh@t
and got drunk.
and finally.
Went to AA with a sincere desire to get and stay sober and asked for help.
My then sponsor told me EXACTLY what was wrong with me......and told me the solution..
Come to the realization that it wasn't all about booze... damn this is about me.
Began to embrace the PROGRAM of AA and things started to become clear.
I needed a program to manage my own life and to change.
Developed a strong belief in god...........turning to faith with time.
Continue to study the book book....continue to change.
Finally found my place in the world...... because i was shown the solution to my dilemma. or rather i was listening.
So i continue to pass it on.........
Thanks to many people but ultimately.......GOD...AA...
rough outline but you get the basics right?
Thanks for listening....god be with you all......
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