nixx

Hello all. I'm a 28 year old artist. My boyfriend of 10 months is an alcoholic and currently in rehab. I'm mainly here to find out the best ways to support him in his time of need. Once he gets out, I'm going to encourage him to join this site as well. He's one week sober and has officially joined AA. I couldn't be more proud.
Let me know if you have any tips on good books to read or things I could do to best support him. Tips on what not to do are welcome as well. Thank you for your time.
-Nixx

Ann

Welcome, Nixx, glad you found us.

Something that would help you more than you know, is finding a meeting for yourself and begin working a program that will help you keep your balance no matter how his recovery is coming. Alanon, Naranon and CoDA and three similar fellowships that many of us have found to be real lifesavers.

I am happy for both of you that he is in rehab but have to add that nothing you do or don't do will keep him sober, only he can do that and this rehab and AA will give him the tools to help when the going gets rough.

Stick around, others will be along to welcome you, and walk with us a while on our journey.

Hugs

splendra

(((((nixx)))))

Welcome to Sober Recovery. My 2 cents is take care of you and keep the focus on yourself. Let him manage his own recovery. I send you good thoughts.

greeteachday

Welcome - He's getting the tools he needs while at rehab, so now is a great time for you to do the same. Reading here and finding Alanon or Naranon meetings is a wonderful start.

Hangin' In

Hey Nixx,

So glad you've found SoberRecovery. There is great information here, so I hope you'll stick around.

I'd also recommend that you find a meeting and start attending. I know my addicted daughter is so glad I found "recovery" for myself through those meetings. And I know she is glad that I learned that I can't work her program (12 step program such as AA or NA) for her, that only she can do that.

I've learned so much from my meetings that have helped me. You see, your meetings will be for you and your bf's meetings will be for him. And trust me, the best thing you can do for you AND him is for you to get your focus on yourself and let him figure out his own recovery.

Hope to see you around some more.

Hugs,
Hangin' In

Spiritual Seeker

Leave his recovery to him. You don't need to do anything for him or ease the work he must do.

Focus on yourself to determine if an alcoholic/addict is the right partner for you.

nixx

thank you. and i will definetly take your advice.

nixx

i've thought a lot about whether or not an alcoholic is the right partner for me. all that chronically comes to mind is the fact that i love him more than anything and am willing to do anything i can to make it work.

Yesterdaysnumb

I hope he doesn't let you down. I felt this way about my husband before...

hope213

welcome to S.R. i am glad you found us. there is not much u can to do support him. it is his recovery. you can keep coming here & read around. focus on you & your needs & how to take care of you. i wish him luck & i know you are proud of him. prayers for you both,

nixx

thanks for your reply. i hope he doesn't let me down either. i have endless faith in him, and KNOW he can do this. we'll see how bad he wants to...

best wishes to you and i hope you and your husband are well.

sailorjohn

Welcome!!!

You can start by reading the posts at the top of each forum-the 'stickies'-a lot of good info there.