2Searay

I would like to introduce myself- I am sober from alcohol (beer) since November 30. It has been a struggle but I have been attending 1 meeting a week and trying to do this on my own. I don't have a sponsor or anything. I am working out again and my family is very supportive but I have found that I am battling depression and my anger is coming back. It is almost like I was always pissed when I was drinking and smoking weed. I did both for almost 30 years . I don't want this becoming a problem. Has anyone had to go on any meds to help them through this. I do not want to relapse but am very depressed and the booze makes me forget. I have a history of depression but never stayed on meds and drank instead. I am making appt with the doctor today and would appreciate any similar feelings or aid. With appreciation..............

least

Overwhelming depression and anxiety were reasons for me to drink, to escape even if just for a little while. Of course both came back much worse from the drinking.

If your doctor prescribes antidepressants will you take them? I found my depression is better now and my antidepresants work much better, now that I'm not negating the effects with alcohol.

Be totally honest with your doctor so that they can help you the best.

What you're experiencing may be PAWS, Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome, which can happen weeks or months after quitting drinking. There's a 'sticky' at the top of the Alcoholism forum with info. Here's the link to that info.
http://www.tlctx.com/ar_pages/paw_part1.htm

Please don't drink to medicate your depression, it will only make it worse. It DOES get better, I promise!:ghug3

Fubarcdn

Welcome Searay.
Making it that long is great.
I can't add much and since you have come this far I am sure you won't but don't drink before you see your doctor. All the best.

mamabin

Welcome 2Searay. I have only been sober for 5 days today but I can tell you that I for one medicated with alcohol. I also have a history of depression. My latest diagnosis is bipolar 2 (whatever) and I am on a few meds. Alot of people are against the meds but I swear they have saved my life. I've had to change doses now and again and I would think it's quite possible that alcohol was your medication. It's great that you're seeing a doctor today, I hope it's a good one! So many of them today just want to prescribe meds and treat us like guinea pigs! Hit me up if you ever want to talk, I've been on alot of these meds (I can't even tell you how many I've tried). I have no idea what's going to happen with them now that I'm sober!

Katie09

Exactly, but I don't have four months sober. Long time ago I had six months and panic disorder didn't set in until that point. For me, depression preceded using. At any rate, I've been drinking for 35 years, save a couple of years. I've been taking meds and do the same thing. Go on them, drink, escape for a bit, stop taking the meds, lie to my shrink (not that YOU do this). But I do know the feeling of getting depressed when I stop masking it with a substance. Unfortunately (or fortunately) drinking and smoking are no longer options for me. I'd encourage you to go to your Dr. and give sobriety enough time for the meds to kick in. That is my plan this time around.

CAPTAINZING2000

If, you've been to a meeting at all, you've probably heard the term, half measures availed us nothing.

In early recovery, I like the term 90 days and 90 meetings. If, you're family is supportive, that's half the battle there.

The emotional part you're going thru, most of us go thru it as well.

This too shall come to pass though

Welcome to S/R

Haunted

Hey searay, congrats on 60 days. I've been on antidepressants for over a year now, and they seem to stabilize my mood pretty well without many side effects. They definitely aren't an instant fix (in my experience) so if you do start the meds, give um' time. I hope the best for you.

grateful2b

Hi Searay
Welcome to SR
Congratulations on 60 days!
There is a lot of information and support here, so have a look around.
Anxiety and Depression dogged me for some time, early in my recovery.
It does get better.

nickishine

Hi Searay and welcome to SR and "the family"!

I agree with Zing above! 90 in 90 really helps in getting that new foundation of sobriety down. Just cuz we get sober doesn't mean we know how to "do life".... AA has helped me re-direct my thinking and provides the tools and steps neccessary to take to create a "design for living" for me. I know there are other avenues that others have taken that work well for them, and I'm all for "whatever works"!!! For me, however, AA has become an intregal part of my recovery process! This time around, I am doing 90 in 90 (although I miss some days and double up later) and have gotten a sponsor! After so many vain attempts of "doing it on my own".... I decided that "my own" is not good enough as I keep landing back in the mire of my addiction relentlessly and it's gotten sooo much worse over time! I've surrendered at this point and am willing to "go to (almost) any length" for my sobriety today! No more half measures or I'll die in the bottle!

As others said, depression and PAWS are huge factors in new recovery! It could be that you need anti-depressants or something prescribed... I don't know as we are all different and some truly need that medicinal help.

If you have a doctor, please see him/her. If you have or feel the need to see a counselor, then go for it! It's YOUR life and it is so worth living whether we have 1 day, 1 week, 1 month, 1 year sobriety!

Being here with all of us trying to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind is HUGE support on this website. Someone is always on and you'll get all different kinds of viewpoints on whatever your going through! Wishing you success on your journey and hope for a brighter future! You are not alone!

Hugs, :ghug3:praying

Hevyn

Welcome Searay - so glad to meet you. (I love Williamsburg.) My husband self medicated his whole life, from age 15. He never had it diagnosed, but looking back I feel certain he suffered from depression. He died 2 yrs. ago, having spent his entire life trying to make himself feel better, increasing his alcohol consumption until it cost him his health, job, etc. It's good you're going to get yourself checked out. Please let us know the outcome. Congratulations on striving for a better life for yourself and your family.

CarolD

Well done on your sober time.....
Welcome to SR!

I'm glad you are seeing your doctor

What I take or why I take med's
are between my doctors and me.
AA is for my recovery from alcoholism.....

Keep in touch....let us know how your doing.

flowersinhair

Hi 2Searay.. I got really depressed about a year ago, cried every day over nothing in particular & just wasn't happy about anything. I got prescribed zoloft, but I also starting seeing a psychotherapist; going to therapy has hands down been the BEST decision of my life. I have been leairning why I do certain things and I can use what I learn and do things differently. You can get to the root of why you are angry or depressed if you really work at therapy, and only then will you be able to overcome those negative mindsets. I absolutely recommend psychotherapy, just make sure to find a dr you trust and are comfortable with. I met with a few not-so-great ones (too pushy, bossy or serious) before I found the one I have now, but I've stuck with her for over a year and like I said, best thing I've ever done. As for sleeping, I used to take Simply Sleep, by Tylenol, but it made it too hard to get up in the morning. Now I take Melatonin, it's natural & just regulates your sleep cycles, also it doesn't make you groggy. Good luck! You CAN be as happy as you want to be!

flowersinhair

Oh, btw I just stopped taking the zoloft a few weeks ago, after enough therapy I noticed I was happy on my own... My dr said the meds are like band-aids, they help at first when the emotions are so raw and still hurt, but ultimately you just need to get to the root of your problems to fix them for good.

2Searay

Thank you all for your advice and support, I feel like I have been walking the plank now for some time. The alone feeling is a bit overwhelming lately and I feel as though I have lost my best friend (alcohol) and that really makes me feel like a selfish piece of crap! I have been self medicating with beer and weed for over 30 years, you would think I would have learned by now, it just dosent work? I thought after 60 days of being sober it would get a little easier BUT I HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO. Thanks again for the support

2Searay

Thank you, it is good to know there is hope for a new life without all the pain and heartache that I have carried around for the past 30 years. I can and I will make it through this.

jowinbo

hope i spelled your name right? i have also self medicated for so many years!

i lost my best friend (alcohol) also. it was very hard, as i always drank at home. now i am knda lost at home?

i have to keep busy, get out, go to AA, etc, else i will be back in that selfpity mode of who cares? I do not care, when i am drinking?

this is not easy, but simpl;e......go to meetings, get a sponsir, work the steps, and FORGIVE yourself....you are worth it!!!!!

grab love and caring from this room we all care and love you and know what you are going thru!

be bkessed
luv jow

2Searay

Thank you for your kind words and your support, I am sorry for the loss of your husband . I already feel alot better about the direction I am moving and with people like yourself helping out I know I can beat this. Thank you again.
Erick

Rouxballs

How are you doing 2searay?