oneillo

Well the time has finally come for me to stop drinking. I am 31 male from st louis. My girl and i had a huge argument last weekend and she was done with me. We went out last night and she is willing to give me one more chance. This is about the 5th time she has done this. She said that i need to find out why this happens all the time. I have come to the conclusion that it is because of the drinking. We never have this problem when sober. Im thinking maybe when i drink im become insecure or.., im still trying to figure that out. she says that when this happens it pushes her further away from me. I don't want to lose her, she is the most amazing lady i know and i love her. So i am going to quit drinking and get my life back on track. It will be hard because i have been drinking for a long time. But after reflecting on it i think i can do it. Drinking hasn't done anything for me but get me in trouble with the law and friends, as well as not feeling to good the next day. The last couple of days have been horrible because she wouldn't talk with me. After talking with her last night i have to do this. She is ok with me to stop drinking. I will be starting my first meeting on friday, kinda nervous i have no idea what to expect. That is my story and the first step i am going to take. Any suggestions would be great, thanks for your time!

Mark75

A meeting Friday night and posting here... A real good start. Keep doing those things and don't drink. Just don't drink for today, then do it again tomorrow...

Welcome

Mark

parentrecovers

thanks for posting, oneillo. i'm originally from your area, and st l has some excellent aa groups. keep reaching out, and let us know how your first meeting goes!

hugs, k

least

I would advise seeing a doctor about quitting drinking as withdrawal can be rough. Other than that, just take it one day at a time and don't pick up that first drink. You can do this!

Welcome!

aasharon90

Admitting you are powerless over alcohol
and that your life is unmanageable is
the first step of a 12 step program that
will guide you into staying sober one day
at a time.

To begin this journey i had to admit i had a
drinking problem and that i needed help. I also
had to stay sober for myself and not for anyone
or anything else.

I also had to get rid of people, places and things
that reminded me of alcohol.

All those so called friends in bars or clubs...
functions where people drank....bbq's, superbowl
party's.....my favorite wine or drinking glasses,
bottles, etc.

I know this sounds like a tall order to fill....its
not impossible to achieve as u will see in ur
AA meetings ALL those that have stayed sober
a many one days at time to get them where
they r today.

I had to go thru the process by following and
listening and abosorbing all I could to get me
where i am today....happier than i ever have been
without the use of alcohol...a POISONOUS"
substance that was soon to kill me if my
family hadnt stepped in to help me .....doing
for me what i certainly couldnt do myself.

Saved my life.

Thanks for letting me share.

sailorjohn

welcome!!!



Listen to what they have to say at the meeting, and try not to compare. For years, I would compare my drinking favorably with folks that I thought drank a lot more than I did, something I did to keep myself in denial.

shaun00

Sounds great and very positive............admitting to yourself of the problem and looking for the solutions...well done.

AA has been a part of my life for a while now.......it fact in played a part in saving me from certain destruction...

Try to listen out for the similarities rather than the differences to your drinking........and try some different meetings out... if you can get to them.
Keep posting here....and sharing...

Because imo....the power of one alcoholic/addict sharing to another is beyond parallel....its powerful stuff..and keeps me sober and content.

Good luck and i look foward to a full report....lol..............trucker

oneillo

One more question. Should i go to this meeting by myself or bring a friend?

Fubarcdn

Welcome aboard Oneillo. I came here pretty much for the same reason as you did. The old ultimatum. My story differs in that I am older and had 35,000 second chances but I am sure that this is my last. Now that I am here reading and sharing I am here for myself. Try reading a lot of the posts, the successes and slips and you will likely come to the same conclusion as I have. Do this for yourself and don't waste your life.

getr345

Congrats and welcome to SR.

I can relate to the domestic instability brought on by alcohol.

My wife & I used to get in all kinds of shouting matches and LOUD conversations in the past but since I quit drinking and she now hardly ever drinks, things have gotten noticeably quieter and more subdued around here. In fact, we have not had a shouting match since.

I realize now that alcohol was fueling this and that we're not like that normally.

shaun00

A few considerations come to mind.....
Friends can help in the beginning cos a bit of moral support goes along way and some people find their first meeting a bit intimidating..
BUT you may wish to share with the group "stuff" that your not happy sharing while a friend is there.
At the moment id say go with what feels comfortable.........trucker

prettypoison

Remember this when you feel the urge come on to drink (which for me is often) and stay vigilant to getting your life/relationship in order. You can do it, there is a lot of support on this site. Glad you're here

DNM0105

Oneillo, I'm in the very situation that you're in, however, I already lost my partner. Its pretty much over and it's because of my drinking. I moved out and it doesn't look like there's a chance of getting back together. I pushed him to his breaking point and now he's gone. I'm on my 11th day sober and believe me it's tough. It's even harder not having him to support me. He doesn't even know I'm doing this. You have someone there very special, I'm sure. Hang on to her. Be honest with her. Show her the side of you that she fell in love with. Being sober 11 days has brought clarity back to my life, but it hasn't brought him back. I don't know if it ever will. In these past 11 days, I've examined myself and what I want and need. If I could share with him I would. You have a chance. Start living your life! Everytime I start thinking of drinking I come here. Anytime I'm feeling alone, I come here. People here are not strangers, they are just like you and I. You've come to the right place.