Chris80

Why is it so hard to get started? I am feeling like the propetual relapser. I have started on Day 1 more times than I can count. I haven't given up and that is the good thing, but I cannot keep going on like this. I drank the weekend through. It's pathetic really - drink, pass out, wake up, drink more, repeat. I have put my girlfriend through Hell and my body through all kinds of misery. I woke up yesterday with marks on my forehead. I had to tell people at the office that I fell on the ice, because I am too ashamed to tell the truth. I can get through a few days and feel great, but then something happens and I just want to drink. What do you all do to stay sober when it seems like a better idea to just drink? Please reply, I really can use the advice.

Thanks,
Chris

KindBird

I too am a restarter, had 45 days from Nov - Dec 2008 and lost it for a few weeks. For me this time I am trying to have a plan which includes..

Spending at least 30 minutes on SR a day reading and responding
Writing in my journal every day about how it is going
Talking with my partner every evening about how it is going
Talking every week with a good friend who I have asked to support me
Reading daily in some books which I find really supportive - (Changing for Good, Smart Recovery, Sober for Good, and the LifeRing manual)

I also have gotten the alcohol out of the kitchen (partner still occasionally drinks so we moved any alcohol to a closet in the hall), bought things I like to drink, and am staying out of the kitchen during cooking time which was my trigger.

I hope I get past day 45 this time. My goal is permanent abstinence. I did not know this back in Nov when I stopped, but now I know that zero and for good is the best way for me.

Good luck. Keep posting and keep coming to these forums!

Bamboozle

I always want to drink...but I can't....so I don't. To remain sober, I'm on SR frequently and I play video games or fix something tasty to eat. It's not easy to stop or stay stopped...the first week is the hardest and time really seems to slow down.

Have you talked to someone who specializes in addiction? If you want to stop and find that you cannot, please ask for some help. Hang in there.

least

For me to stay sober I have to stay 'in the moment' and just not pick up that first drink. I have to remind myself when cravings hit, that I can't have 'just one', it will always end up badly and feel like crap the next day. I am still aware of how bad my last withdrawal was and how I don't ever want to go thru that again.

Chris80

All good advice - thank you all. I always seem to forget how bad withdrawl is until I am going through it. My plan now is to "think through the drink." Meaning that when I have a craving, instead of thinking solely on the instant benefits of drinking, I will think of where I will be tomorrow. Today is Day 1 for me, and God willing, tomorrow will be day 2. I know that tonight will be a night of little sleep, even though I am exhausted, and I will likely have the sweats. It's no lie that it is easier to stay clean than get clean.

BamBoozle - yeah I have talked with people who specialize in addiction. Its when I start throwing a pity party that I tend to forget everything I have learned and pick up a bottle.

I have no illusion that I can't have just one - I am working on realizing that I am worthy of being sober.

allport

The really bad thing is you only realise how badly you need to stop while the alcohol is still in your system and the shame is the only thing you feel.

If you are anything like me you need to be able to get that feeling back.

I know its not a long term solution but it works for a while and gives you that clear head for a while.

It hasnt really worked for me but I dont know what else to do, I am white knuckling it big time.

least

Drink lots of water and juice, B vitamins can help, and chamomile tea helps with anxiety. Drinking lots of fluids will help flush out your system. B vitamins are destroyed by alcohol so us alkies need B vits. Drink lots of water.

Make this your last 'day one'. YOu can do it. If a chronic relapser like me can stay sober, so can you.

Chris80

I cannot guarantee that this will be my last day 1, but I can say that I will do my best to make sure it is. I am going to be on this site or talking to someone in recovery until I go to sleep tonight. Today is a great day to get sober.

Thanks for the advice about the B vitamins. I keep a supply on hand for hangovers, but I forgot to take one.

lovinmenow

Find 10 things you would rather do than drink. Than do them!! Praying for all.

sailorjohn

Actually, what you describe sounds like the way a few of us drank, but I never characterized my drinking bouts as relapses, was just giving my body a rest before the next round. All I can suggest is that you may still feel that you get more from drinking than it takes from you, and maybe you just haven't reached a bottom yet? I honestly don't know, but today, when I have those insane thoughts, I play the tape all the way through. I don't want to go back to where I came from, ever. Good Luck.

pangur

First about my future with drink (misery, depression, lower life expectancy)
Then, my future without drink, it's really a no brainer.
This works for me, of course I still have cravings and withdrawal (I'm only on day 4), but it's working so far.
I pay into 2 pension funds, if I continue drinking I'll be dead and broke by 65. If I quit, I'll have a better chance of a long life with plenty of money to enjoy with my family YAY!

flutter

I had to find my place where I wanted to be sober more than I wanted a drink.. I always want to drink.. but I want to be sober more so.

YOU CAN guarantee the last day one, it's up to you! We're here to support you !

NewDayNow

Lots of great advice here

and

SailorJohn pretty much nailed it:


Works for me at times

Ed

Rouxballs

Chris I went through the same crap--I would quit for a few days then drink for a few-when i worked long hours I felt I was treating myself to a drink--I deserved it.
I think its just, our thinking is out of wack.
This is my story and I am sticking with it:
I woke up and decided enough is enough-I really wanted to quit--next, I kicked in my strongest wave of will power--44 days later I am still sober typing a message to chris80 on sober recovery . com.
The longer I go sober, the easier it gets.

You can do it chris

michigangirl

I have avoided all situations that would put me near alcohol. I even changed the place where I buy my cigerretes. I am also now on antidepressants which I contribute ALOT to helping my cravings. I spoke to my doctor about my drinking, but the antidepressants are actually the type to help stop smoking, which has also curved my cravings to drink. And probably the biggest thing this time around is SR!!!

I try to come here everyday and read and post. This place is the best.

Fubarcdn

This is only my third day so I don't really know yet. This forum is a real help and I am on it so far most of the day. I told my grown children today and they want to help. We played Yatzi all evening and although that might sound kinda corny I had the best time I had in a long time. I think if you can get those close to you to do things that don't focus on alcohol it will help make things a lot easier.

Tommyh

I go to AA

Sugah

AA?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

CAPTAINZING2000

I have a gratitude list a mile long.

YouTube - STARSHIP- NOTHING'S GONNA STOP US NOW (MANNEQUIN)