Up Date
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
Up Date
Hey ya'll I have to be brief the computer I am on right now does not work very well. But I thought you might like to know I am separated from my H and staying with my mom.
I am warm and safe but still uncomfortable enough to get on with making the changes I need to make.
I am so done.
My family thinks I will go back to H. I must prove them wrong. I have told H that I want him gone. He says he is going to have a moving sale next weekend. I am going to stay out of his way. He has nothing to say I think he knows it is over. I want the THIS TRANSITION to have as little drama as possible.
My son and brothers want to go force him out now. I feel it could cause trouble and I want to just give him a little time to move on without any force. Thanks for being my friends and for your suppport. This change has been a very long time in coming...
I am warm and safe but still uncomfortable enough to get on with making the changes I need to make.
I am so done.
My family thinks I will go back to H. I must prove them wrong. I have told H that I want him gone. He says he is going to have a moving sale next weekend. I am going to stay out of his way. He has nothing to say I think he knows it is over. I want the THIS TRANSITION to have as little drama as possible.
My son and brothers want to go force him out now. I feel it could cause trouble and I want to just give him a little time to move on without any force. Thanks for being my friends and for your suppport. This change has been a very long time in coming...
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,944
Good luck with the future you are planning for your self! I agree that as drama free as possible would be fantastic! Just try to tell your brother and son that you don't want them to get into trouble by confronting your STB exAH...
Hugs!
HG
Hugs!
HG
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
(((Splendra))) You have been in my thoughts and prayers and I am so glad you are out of there and safe and warm.
Staying out of the drama is so much easier once we give up our front row seat. I see your recovery just shining here.
You are an amazing lady, filled with courage and grace, and I just know that you will make it through this pain and come out the other side like a butterfly ready to spread your wings.
Keeping you in my prayers, asking for many blessings to head your way.
Hugs
Staying out of the drama is so much easier once we give up our front row seat. I see your recovery just shining here.
You are an amazing lady, filled with courage and grace, and I just know that you will make it through this pain and come out the other side like a butterfly ready to spread your wings.
Keeping you in my prayers, asking for many blessings to head your way.
Hugs
A work in progress....
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: FREE!!!! Somewhere in the Tennessee Mountains
Posts: 1,018
Hey girl,
Take it from one who recently did the same thing-it will not be easy, but it will be good. Trust God to lead and protect you. He will.
I cannot even convey how it feels to be away from the drama and chaos. I am coming up on two years since I seperated (March2). There were a lot of shaky moments and a lot of mindgames in the beginning. But the longer you stay out, the stronger you will be.
It's akin to coming clean off drugs. It's OUR addiction and it takes a bit for the mind to clear. But it will. Stay strong!
Blessings!
Take it from one who recently did the same thing-it will not be easy, but it will be good. Trust God to lead and protect you. He will.
I cannot even convey how it feels to be away from the drama and chaos. I am coming up on two years since I seperated (March2). There were a lot of shaky moments and a lot of mindgames in the beginning. But the longer you stay out, the stronger you will be.
It's akin to coming clean off drugs. It's OUR addiction and it takes a bit for the mind to clear. But it will. Stay strong!
Blessings!
To Life!
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
(((Splendra)))
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers are you go through this difficult "transition." :praying
Even when it is our own decision to leave and to end the marriage, there is still a loss here. And you may need to heal from that loss. So, please be kind to yourself. And be as gentle with yourself now and in the coming months, as you would be with a good friend going through the same thing.
Shalom!
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers are you go through this difficult "transition." :praying
Even when it is our own decision to leave and to end the marriage, there is still a loss here. And you may need to heal from that loss. So, please be kind to yourself. And be as gentle with yourself now and in the coming months, as you would be with a good friend going through the same thing.
Shalom!
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I'm so glad you are out and safe, Splendra. As Ann said, I think being away fromt he front row action helps to make things more clear and to heal. You're an amazing woman and I know you will take good care of yourself and do what you need to do. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Calif
Posts: 1,007
Splendra
Sounds to me like you are on the right path! Good for you.
You are making a great choice by "staying out" of the drama. Gosh I hate chaos! If you're separated from it, it is much easier to cope.
Good for you, good for you!! I, for one, am proud of you and your choices.
Hugs, Devastated
You are making a great choice by "staying out" of the drama. Gosh I hate chaos! If you're separated from it, it is much easier to cope.
Good for you, good for you!! I, for one, am proud of you and your choices.
Hugs, Devastated
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
I can't help but wonder where I would be with out ya'll walking this out with me.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words, thoughts and, prayers. Ya'll are wondeful!! :ghug
Thank you so much for your encouraging words, thoughts and, prayers. Ya'll are wondeful!! :ghug
Southern through and through
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
Splenda,
I am so glad to hear you sounding strong and healthy as to what you want for your life. Way to go.
Last night I had dinner with 2 recovery friends. And we laughed as we said the theme for the new year is "NO DRAMA in 2009!". I think that might just be a good phrase for you!
Big hugs, Splendra. You are an inspiration.
Hangin' In
I am so glad to hear you sounding strong and healthy as to what you want for your life. Way to go.
Last night I had dinner with 2 recovery friends. And we laughed as we said the theme for the new year is "NO DRAMA in 2009!". I think that might just be a good phrase for you!
Big hugs, Splendra. You are an inspiration.
Hangin' In
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
In stressful times like that, especially if it means I have to be around family a little more than I care to be, I think of my FIL (who is extremely hard of hearing) and try to emulate him ...Smile and nod, smile and nod 
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Splendra, yeah, ditto Greet 
I also tend to make myself scarce, spend absolutely as little time as possible around them (and I've had lots of practice!!)
Stay safe
Big hugs and love
GL
I also tend to make myself scarce, spend absolutely as little time as possible around them (and I've had lots of practice!!) Stay safe
Big hugs and love
GL
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