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I'm brand new to this and very afraid to quit....

Old 12-25-2008, 06:51 PM
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I'm brand new to this and very afraid to quit....

Hi everyone. I don't know what led me to this site, but I'm glad to be here. I'm a middle age woman who is a former model and still attractive....but drinking is taking it's toll with my personality, weight, finances, etc...
I keep it all together...by the skin of my teeth and know that NOW is the time to do something positive. I'm SO SCARED to quit drinking cause it's all I've known in my social life and I'm so afraid I won't be "loose" enough to have fun if I don't drink. My husband and I entertain alot and I feel that I'm a boring person without alcohol in me.
Can anyone give me some first baby steps to help me?
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:06 PM
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Welcome Hippychicky!

Originally Posted by hippychicky View Post
Can anyone give me some first baby steps to help me?
You've already taken a bunch of baby steps.

Your concerned enough about your drinking that you found this website.
You've recognized and don't like the affects that drinking is having in your life.
You had the courage to post here.
And the biggest of all - your asking for help.

Congratulations! Your making progress already. Please stick around, just keep reading and posting and good things will happen.
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:07 PM
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Hi hippychicky!

I'm so glad that you were lead here to SR. Welcome. It's always baby steps when we first get sober, no matter our age or circumstances. I think it is such a relief when we know that we're not alone and that there are so many wonderful people who are ready to support us. It's just the beginning of a journey that has so many rewards. That's been my experience so far.

Take your time and stroll around the place. There are many good and interesting reads in the various stickies located at the top of the various headings.

Post as much as you want, as often as you want.

And a late Merry Christmas/holiday to you.



Donna
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:16 PM
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For me to quit drinking....I found I did have to make lifesstyle
changes. And I don't regret that action in the least.

Welcome to our recovery community....
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:19 PM
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Welcome. This is a wonderful place.

Read and post, those are two things that are good first steps.
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:21 PM
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I'm glad to see you thinking in baby steps...cause the changes that we make in our lives to get and stay sober are all accomplished one baby step at a time.

Please take time to read through some threads and find things you relate to. There are many helpful posts here, and the 2 weeks and under thread in newcommer daily support will be a big help if you care to join in.

The courage to post here is the begining of a great journey....try to eat properly and get lots of rest...it's a good start to staying sober.
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:25 PM
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Hey there Hippychicky!

I'm a newbie here too, and I know exactly how you feel. It took me years to make the decision to quit. Then I quit for 4 years and made the bad decision to have "just one drink" at a dinner party in my honor for a promotion I had worked for and earned. What a way to celebrate by screwing up 4 years of sobriety, huh?

Your first days, weeks and months can be challenging, but you can do it! During that time, learn and read all you can about staying sober. Do whatever you think you have to do. There are lots of resources listed here for your to try.

I just joined Smart Recovery, which is listed in the resources here. Go there, take the tutorials, and then do the CBA worksheet. Then sign up on their forum too. You can never have too many sober friends!

If you think an AA meeting might work, you can try that too. It did not work for me, but it helps lots of other people, so that's an option.

As to your being a boring person without alcohol...perish the thought! You are who you are regardless of the booze. It's all in how you allow yourself to think. You obviously realize that alcohol is hurting you physically and mentally, and that is why you came here. With that realization, begin to change your thinking about alcohol and about yourself. There are lots of resources out here on the internet, so spend the next days learning all you can. If you truly want to stop, you can and will succeed!
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:32 PM
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:45 PM
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Hi, I am new here too. Read my post about what will happen if you CONTINUE, sometimes it takes a little fear maybe? I am loosing my looks, FAST, as well as my brain. I have already lost my life. (Kids, mate, house, car, job, on and on)

Perhaps it is wrong to instill fear into someone who is trying to recover, but I wish you well.
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Old 12-25-2008, 07:46 PM
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What I have found that went wrong in recent attempts to quit drinking, was that I simply quit drinking. Then I realized I had to learn to live sober. That is completely different. I cannot maintain my sobriety and live the same life I have been, the two don't co-exist. Babysteps got you here, we can help support your LEAP into sobriety
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Old 12-25-2008, 08:06 PM
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Welcome Hippychick and I'm glad you posted. I sometimes feel boring without a drink also. I also wondered how I would live without alcohol in my life. I'm 42 years old and its been a part of my life for 25 plus years. How do you change that? Baby steps as you said. The first one was I went 24 hours without a drink and then I did a week and my first weekend! Wow I can do this and now 7 months later I'm still sober. Some days I go back to the 24 hour pledge and this was my first Christmas and I definitely did the 24 hours and it worked. Yup! Still sober and very proud. You can do it and I'll enjoy watching your days add up.

By the way, I am sitting here with my MP3 player plugged into my ears typing away and enjoying my music once again. My husband bought me this for Christmas and its amazing how music can soothe the soul and energize the spirit. Go ahead plug in some Van Morrison and escape through music instead of a bottle. I dare ya!
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Old 12-25-2008, 08:11 PM
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Welcome to a great new beginning of sobriety. I hope You will find you are more amusing and will have more fun than you could imagine. You are not alone and I have been where you are. Alcohol will take a toll on our body, finances and appearance.
Hopeing you have a wonderful new year of sobriety! LOl
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Old 12-25-2008, 08:41 PM
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It gets a lot easier when you start to confront the fears behind sobriety. I am sure you'd find you're not at all a bad host if you're not drinking. You said that drinking was damaging your "personality." On a guess, that means it's hurting some social interaction?

If you're drinking is problematic it is almost impossibly unlikely to get any easier. For most everyone it only gets stable for a bit or gets worse.

You might try writing out a list of pros and cons of quitting or not quitting. This is effective if you do it honestly. For me, I was afraid at first that I'd be losing a means of winding down after work. My cons included broken relationships, job instability, and loss of money. In the light of the cons, it was hard to argue in favor of a day-end relaxant.

Coming here has also been helpful for me. Suggestions are endless. Sometimes just saying the problem to an anonymous group like this helps.

Also, a temporary change of routine seems to work well for a lot of people. You might want to take a break from socializing for awhile. Tell people white lies if you must. But where you used to spend time drinking, try something new in it's place. Obviously, something that you would enjoy.
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Old 12-25-2008, 09:28 PM
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welcome hippychick!!!
god i love the name!!!!!!
hang around here sweet, read alot antake it in.
honestly this forum is so much fun an you will soon realise your inner comedian!
you dont need booze to be fun truly!
we all have such a scream here without it, now i just apply the same out there as i do here
i be myself, cos im damn entertaining as i am!
yay for you to find us theres your very first step...
admitting you have a problem.
your second step was admitting by your post you felt unmanageable
your 3rd step was reaching out to something greater than you, which was this forum!!!!!!!!!!!
your doin just fantastic girl!
keep it up! one day at a time keep it up!!!
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Old 12-26-2008, 02:30 AM
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HC, welcome to the family...

HC
Can anyone give me some first baby steps to help me?
taking the Bah Bah (Booze Bottle) out of the mouth...

good wishes HC!
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Old 12-26-2008, 09:16 AM
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I want to thank all of you who replied to this (my first!) post. I'm sitting here crying my heart out because of you WONDERFUL people. I really do feel your love and support, and I've been doing alot of reading on this site. THANK GOD I found you, I feel like I found my home.
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Old 12-26-2008, 09:18 AM
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I'm thankful that you found us too this is a wonderful place to take up virtual residence. Welcome! :ghug3
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