jeffde23

I have been a weekend drinker for about 11 years. 3 nights a week about 12 beers. It has never affected my work and I never hit rock bottom, but has affected my relationship with my wife. It wasn't the root cause of the relationship issues, but definately contributed to the problems. About 16 days ago, I decided to quit - on my own. I have had no desire to drink. My wife is still concerned and wants me to go to counseling twice a month. How do I know if I truly need outside help? What do I talk about when I feel no pull to alcohol? I realize that I had a problem and believe I know why I was doing it. I have removed those things from my life. I will go to make her happy, but I would like to know if it is worthwhile.

getr345

I don't know if you need any help (outside or otherwise) but what comes next after getting some sober time under your belt is figuring out why you drank like that in the first place and then actually dealing with and feeling the emotions of whatever it was you used alcohol to escape from.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

I think you need to decide yourself whether or not counselling would help.

What I do know, is that drinking is a symptom. There are underlying problems that cause the problem. For me, I had to do a lot of soul-searching when I stopped drinking.

Jakey

Jeff - I don't know whether or not you should go to counseling but I just wanted to say that I can totally relate to your situation. I was also a weekend binge drinker, I had my last drink 10 days ago. Fortunately it never had a big negative affect on my job and somehow I never had a DUI or jail time. But like you it did cause problems with my wife. She hasn't asked me to go to counseling but if she did I would probably go I guess.

If you think counseling will improve your relationship then I would go for it. Good luck!

spiritualgiant

Hey bud, i look at new posts and consider replying but only if i can give helpful advice and i completely agree with getr345, i believe that the only correct suggestion is what he said, good luck man and god bless ya

nickishine

Jeff, thanks for your post!

I, like the others, don't know if counselling would benefit you or not but as Anna said, "alcohol is the sysmtom of other underlying problems". That's the truth of it! It surely can't hurt and you may learn more about you than you do at this point..... hmmm?? Could be interesting and certainly won't hurt your marriage..... If I were in your shoes, I'd go for it!

Good luck and keep us posted!

Best,
Nicki

tommyk

I quit drinking on my own, I was a binge drinker too.

I went to counseling a couple of times and got some really good information.

I'm glad I went and I'd go back again if I felt the urge.

Tryingto

I am 'in' counseling, but for my relationship....not to talk about alcohol (though my counselor has knowledge I have a problem. She is very gentle & just tells me it's not to late. But she doesn't push me into anything).
I am not going to get outside help. I am going to use this forum, myself, my partner & if I need it... my counselor.