dragostexjane

Hi. I'm obviously new and I have a question.
I've be told one of the ways to get away from drugs is to disassociate yourself from the people you know do them.
But that's one of the main things I have a problem with.
Some of these people are family and others are really good friends I've known all my life.
I've done drugs with them, but I've also been sober with them too.
They think its fine that I'm choosing not to do drugs and they don't pressure me to do them either.
But sometimes I find it hard to not do them when they're around.
Pot is nothing, but its other substances I have problems with.
Yet I can't bring myself to stay away from these people.
Anyone have any advice?

Rusty Zipper

repeat... disassociate yourself from the people you know do them.

for today...

Ananda

It sounds like they are supportive, so just tell them that you want to spend time with them, but it can't be when they are using as it is too hard for you right now. Friends will understand. Those who can't do that you may have to seperate from for now, but some will proably be happy to be supportive...at least thats how it was for me.

Anna

I don't know what the answer is for you, but I know that early recovery involves making some very hard choices. I did cut a couple of people out of my life, family members, who were toxic to me. I needed all the help I could get and anything that triggered thoughts about drinking was negative to me.

Epiphany00

My sister had the same problem and she landed herself in jail. She had to move to another town away from her family and friends to get clean. I feel awful because when I was strung out I gave my sister her first pill. For me to get clean I had to move to another state. You may not realize it, but these people that you love can trigger memories of getting high, and memories trigger cravings. Look at it this way, my sister and my cousin used to run around and get high together. My sister moved away and lost all contact with my cousin and everyone else she knew that did drugs and my cousin stayed in town and kept all the same friends. My cousin has been to jail 3 times since my sister moved, has lost 50 lbs from shooting coke, and is sleeping with the dope men. My sister has been clean for 6 months, made all new friends, and is doing great. My advice is to keep your distance, but everyone is different. It was so hard for my sister and I to move away from everyone we know and love, and to start over. But we did it and we've never been happier.

Good luck to you, you can do it!

Mariposa18

I can understand how you are feeling since my Brother is going through the same thing right now. Every time he tries to get clean and straighten out, his "Friends" bail or end up pressuring him and he gives in. Or they use in front of him, even when they say it's okay if he doesn't do it, but really that's not a good situation to be in.

As sad as it its, you will have to stay away from people when they use. Even if it's been years having it in front of you it's way too tempting.

Good Luck Sweetie~

nickishine

I agree with Ananda. Limit your time with them and communicate that you can't have drugs or whatever around while you visit with them. Do you have a support system/group set in place for yourself?? Have you checked out NA or AA?? That's a great avenue to take and to meet new people who can relate to what you're going through. It's also a way to make new clean & sober friends that you can hang out with instead of the norm. Just a suggestion.

Please keep posting!

Hugs,
Nicki:ghug

NoelleR

"I've be told one of the ways to get away from drugs is to disassociate yourself from the people you know do them..."

Actually, disassociating yourself is NOT a 'way' to 'get away' from (using) drugs, but as you also said.....:

"... sometimes I find it hard to not do them when they're around..."

....and THIS is why it is usually 'suggested' to folks who are just starting on a road of recovery (have stopped using), that it's usually a good thing to stay away from folks who use, at least in the beginning..... (o:

As others have said, ask your friends (and family) if they could not use when around you, at least in this beginning of your road of recovery.....


NoelleR

dragostexjane

See I've done those oddly enough.
I moved from Texas to Washington and lived there for a year with family.
(They made me insane so I left.)
But once I came back even though I hadn't talked to the people in a year they somehow(friend wise anyways, its hard to stay away from family)found me.
Of course I was just happy to be back with my friends, some of them have also recovered a bit.
My own brother(whom doesn't live with me but is a few months younger than I) and I used to smoke meth together, and he kicked the habit soon after I'd left.
Though he still does it from time to time, I can't be around it.
That's the thing I've had the biggest problem with.
I literally go into a panic attack if I see it cause my brain stops and I don't know what to do.
So all in all leaving didn't exactly help.
Mind, it helped while I was away...but once I came back it was the same thing.
I'm just wondering how to break the circle I guess.
I mean I've pretty much cut my brother off, we usually only talk on the phone and see each other every few months.(even though he lives down the street.) but it hurts me to not see him.
I've cut off people before, I did it to my own father...then he died.
I couldn't stand if I did the same thing and it happened to another family member or a close friend.
I guess really its that fear that's making it hard for me to well, disassociate myself from these people.

I guess the real question would be how do I rid myself of that fear?