Language of Letting Go - Nov. 16 - The Victim Trap

Old 11-16-2008, 02:53 AM
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Language of Letting Go - Nov. 16 - The Victim Trap

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go

The Victim Trap

The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr.

We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves.

We aren't helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power - not to change or control others, but to solve the problems that are ours to solve.

Using each problem that comes our way to "prove" that life is hard and we are helpless - this is codependency. It's the victim trap.

Life does not have to be difficult. In fact, it can be smooth. Life is good. We don't have to "awfulize" it, or ourselves. We don't have to live on the underside.

We do have power, more power than we know, even in the difficult times. And the difficult times don't prove life is bad; they are part of the ups and downs of life; often, they work out for the best.

We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances.

Life is challenging. Sometimes, there's more pain than we asked for; sometimes, there's more joy than we imagined.

It's all part of the package, and the package is good.

We are not victims of life. We can learn to remove ourselves as victims of life. By letting go of our belief that life has to be hard and difficult, we make our life much easier.

Today, God, help me let go of my belief that life is so hard, so awful, or so difficult. Help me replace that belief with a healthier, more realistic view.


From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Old 11-16-2008, 03:00 AM
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Ann
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We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances.
Who knew that change would begin with ME? For so long I waited and prayed for everyone else to change, I waited for their outcome to be MY way. And then I learned that I wasn't in charge of anyone else's life and certainly not in charge of the universe.

What an eye-opener to discover that if I adjusted my attitude, found some faith and gratitude and the courage to find a better path for myself, my life would get better, one day at a time.

I don't have to be a victim today living in the problem. I much prefer to be a survivor living in the solution. All it takes is a little adjustment in attitude and perspective.

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